Ascendant
by LostInYou-TDG
Summary: Post Allegiant - So much happening that will change everything! Tris is back... or is she? Can Tobias and Zeke figure it out in time? Will Tris be able to help or is her memory out of reach? FourTris... A secret organisation, not just a relationship. Will their love have a happily ever after? Enjoy! Please R&R, love hearing the reviews! Will be updating again soon!
1. Chapter 1

Chapter 1

TOBIAS

"How are you Tobias," Evelyn asked me. I started to answer with my typical 'I'm fine' response but before I could get a word out she added, "I mean how are you really?" I sigh. It has been three years since Tris died and I still can't seem to get over her. I still haven't even looked at another girl. I am beginning to wonder if I will ever get over her. Or want to. I wasn't sure I actually wanted to move on. How could anyone compare?

"I'm getting there," I answered eventually. She came over and placed a hand on my cheek gently. She continued to look better and better. She was much more vibrant since she spent time away and has been much more loving since that day she chose me. She actually seemed like a mother to me now.

"I know Tris and I never got on, but I also know how much you loved her. I wish I had given her a chance instead of being so stubborn in thinking I knew what was best for you despite not even knowing you. I was so sure she wasn't good enough for you," Evelyn said, regret making her eyes shine with unshed tears. I was a little surprised at her, she had never until this point shown any regret or sadness that Tris hadn't made it out that day.

"I would have liked her to see you like this," I said, and swallowed the lump in my throat. I kept focusing on the fact each day was getting slightly easier. I preferred when people stopped asking me how I was doing, but it was what normal mothers' did. And when people mentioned her I was torn between wishing they hadn't, then feeling guilty because she certainly deserved to be mentioned and then being the opposite and wanting to talk about her all the time.

I meant it though, I was mending. We were all mending together. Christina and I were continuing to forge quite a strong friendship. We laughed about some of the things Tris had said or done, though it wasn't often we talked about her. It was far too painful. Now I wondered why I had never liked Christina in the first place, and completely understood why Tris had liked her. She was forthright, blunt and completely unthinking sometimes, but she had a great heart and always tried to do what she thought was right.

"I would have liked that too," Evelyn said and in a completely non-Evelyn fashion, crushed me to her in a bear hug. I hadn't cried over Tris in such a long time, but for whatever reason, this undid me now and I blubbered like a baby. "Oh son," she said and tried to soothe me. She rubbed my back softly but all I could think about was how I missed the feeling of Tris' arms around me. I had never loved anyone before Tris, and wasn't sure I would after her.

I finally slowed my breathing, and calmed myself down until I was just hiccupping. But I knew my eyes would be red. I took deep breaths and slowly pulled myself together. "I'm sorry," I said softly but Evelyn shook her head.

"Don't ever be sorry for letting out your emotions or not being so damn macho," she said and I almost laughed. "Especially not around me. How's your work with Johanna going? You seem to be enjoying government? I still don't trust politicians though," she added and this time I did laugh. I was still fighting with my words instead of guns though occasionally I did miss the combative side.

"I am enjoying it. So far we are all working together to ease transitions between different locations and work on equality for everyone. It has been quite peaceful so far and I am relishing it." Though we no longer had factions, there were still the same essences of excellence. Those who were always studying and focussed on knowledge, those who were charitable and leaned toward improving conditions for all, those who were agricultural and held a sunny disposition, our law makers and truthsayers, and then those who preferred and active, combative type life including our police force.

The difference now was, that there was no factions, no limit on who you could and couldn't see… and that the lives of the people were by choice. Anyone could change their focus at any time and it was more integrated into a typical style life. There were no "factionless outcasts" or "Genetically Damaged" people in the fringe. We were all equal but had different passions and were free to explore them.

Anyone could be elected into government but had to have worked their way up through the government system, as I was. That only meant that someone random off the street was unable to apply for a government position without learning the ropes beforehand.

"I'm glad you're enjoying it. Though I do see you looking at George with some envy when you see him out training the troops. I think you miss it," Evelyn said and I looked at her surprised. I didn't know she had noticed so much about me. She'd never been quite so observant, or if she had, hadn't been as vocal about her observations.

"I do miss it sometimes. But I am enjoying what I am doing for the moment. I feel like I am making a difference. Now, can you tell I've been crying?" I asked her after a quick glance at my watch. I was meant to meet Christina for lunch in ten minutes. I needed to get going.

"No son, you're fine. I will see you later," she said and left. I took another deep breath, pushed Tris to the back of my mind, and left as well, heading out of my apartment and down the street to the café. I walked quickly the café and wondered why I was rushing when Christina was always "fashionably" late. I sat down in a booth where I had a nice view out the window and waited for Christina to arrive.

"Hey Four," came a voice and I looked up. It was Zeke. Things between us had finally gotten back to where they should be. I still blamed myself to a degree for Uriah's death, and I missed that kid. I had let Zeke get a good hit in, as I had when I left with Caleb that day and since then we let bygones be bygones.

"Hey Zeke. How are you?" I asked and he just grinned.

"Loving taking these pansycakes through their training," he said as one of the police trainers with George. I always knew he would be good at that kind of stuff. He seemed to have a knack for coaching and had always helped Uriah and the others.

"Hope you aren't trying to be too Dauntless," I said and grinned back.

"No Four, it isn't anything like that. But we do want them tough and they have brought back the fear landscape, though now it is used purely as a training tool to help them get a grip on their fears," he replied. I had already known they brought back the fear landscape with the serum. I had been part of the council that approved it. I thought it was a good experience to face one's fears.

"And how is it going with the recruits?" I asked, I was keen to hear how they were coping through it.

"Similarly to how we did," Zeke said. "The first time freaks them out but they are starting to get a grip on them."

"That's good. I was hoping that would be the case."

"Anyway Four, I better get back. George will kill me if he doesn't get fed soon," he said and laughed, gesturing the big bag of food he was taking with him. I laughed.

"See ya Zeke," I said and he left. I glanced at my watch. Christina was now fifteen minutes late. Nothing unusual there. I leaned back in the chair and kind of zoned out, listening to chatter around me and staring out the window when my heart started pounding, my palms started sweating and my mouth went dry. It couldn't be.

A small blonde woman close to my age walked past. She was the same frame, same height, same walk as Tris, wearing tight black pants with multiple pockets in the legs, and a blue V necked shirt. And she had tattoos though I couldn't see what they were. Were they the same? The hair was the same colour though it was longer than it was when she had died. Closer to the length it was when we met and it was braided as she had worn during her initiate training. As she glanced up at me as she walked, with me gaping at her open mouthed, she smiled at me just like Tris smiled with the same colour eyes as Tris. I jumped up and ran outside and collided with Christina.

"Did you see her?" I asked her frantically, looking over her head down the street. I couldn't see Tris anywhere.

"See who Four?" she asked me, staring at me oddly. She was unused to seeing me this way – frantic, insecure, neurotic and emotional.

"Tris," I uttered and she sighed and took my hand, leading me back inside.

"Come on Four, let's have some lunch." She obviously thought I was hallucinating or having a break down. I looked once more along the street but saw no one that looked like her. What the hell was that? It was not enough of her, and at the same time, it was too much. Her mouth, the warmth of her body, the feeling had when I kissed her…

I sighed.


	2. Chapter 2

Chapter 2

TOBIAS

Christina and I had lunch and then I walked over to my office and let Johanna know I would be heading over to the police training ground. I wanted to run through my own fear landscape again. I hadn't done it since before Tris had died. I was too worried about what would be in it. But now I just had to see her again and I was fairly certain she would appear somewhere.

I went the old way, the same way we used to take the faction initiates, for the police training centre was in the old Dauntless facility. It was the best setup for it, having already contained sleeping quarters, training rooms, fighting rings, targets etc.

I checked my watch again. There was a train coming in two minutes so I ran down to the track as the train approached. I ran alongside it and pulled myself up into the carriage. Despite fighting with "words" now, I still kept a fit lifestyle.

As the train ran through the city, I felt the rush of the wind on my face. As the train approached the rooftop of the building, I ran with no hesitation and jumped onto the roof, landing on my feet. I had forgotten how much I enjoyed this. I walked over to the edge of the roof and then had a moment's hesitation. Would they have moved the net? Would the net still be there? I looked over the edge but of course couldn't see the bottom.

Well, only one way to find out. I jumped off the roof and closed my eyes, remembering when Tris had been the first to jump. The Stiff. I chuckled at the memory as I hit the net and bounced before hitting it again. I rolled off the edge and entered the old Dauntless tunnels, heading for the rooms that contained the fear platform.

No one stopped me though a few looked at me curiously. I was a man on a mission. My whole body ached with the thought of seeing her again. I made it to the rooms and noticed one was free. I locked the door and walked over to the machine. I hooked myself up then injected the serum without hesitation. I sighed as I sank back onto the chair. Here we go…

I looked around. I was on top of the Hancock building. Zeke was standing there, goading me to get on the zipline again. I looked down and thought about the last time I did this. My heart was pounding. But this time I had an added reason for wanting to move on. I wanted to see her. I got him to quickly strap me in and I dived off the building, flying through the air.

Then I noticed the walls around me were closer to me and I started panicking, gulping in air. "Calm down Tobias," I heard her voice say in my mind. And though the walls continued to crowd me, I took deep calming breaths and forced myself to move on. I pushed against the wall and this time the walls stopped coming closer to me.

They moved much further out at a speed that made me dizzy and revealed Evelyn standing in my apartment. She was staring at the blue ornament. She turned and saw me and sneered. "I can't believe you believed I had changed. You fool. And this," she said as she picked up the ornament, "was just a way to know what you were doing. See this," she said and pointed to a section of the ornament and rubbed it. The blue came away to reveal a camera lense.

"How could anyone love someone like you Tobias? You're damaged. You're broken. You were never as brave as her, as selfless, as strong. You were never good enough for her! She never loved you!" she shouted at me and I had to remind myself this wasn't real. I put my hands over my ears in a childish fashion and closed my eyes and focused on my breathing. It wasn't real. It wasn't real. Come on Tobias.

When I looked up, Evelyn was gone and I was in my bedroom. There she was. Tris. Asleep in my bed. She had one arm stretched out over my side of the bed, seeking me. A lock of hair covered her face and moved slightly with each breath she took. I eased on to the bed and gently tucked her hair behind her ear. I tried not to wake her. I was too overwhelmed at seeing her again. Then she opened her eyes.

"Hello," she murmured and sat up slowly. I just stared at her. She turned and kneeled in front of me as I sat there staring at her. Then she brought her mouth to mine and wrapped her arms around my neck. To kiss her again, was totally worth facing my fears. I lost myself in it. She was so warm. My hand found her hip and I eased the edge of her shirt up, putting my hand on her skin as she ran her hand under my shirt, up my back, pulling me to her.

Finally she pulled back and rested her forehead on mine. "I was wondering when you would come looking for me," she said and I pulled back sharply to stare at her.

"What do you mean come looking for you?" I asked her.

"Did you really think I wouldn't have a backup plan?" she asked, tilting her head to one side. "I told you to trust me."

"I do trust you. But you died. I scattered your ashes. I actually zip lined for you!" I said, starting to shout as I stood up. Was it possible that she was alive?

"Oh Tobias! I'm so proud of you," she exclaimed and launched herself at me again, kissing me hard and we lost ourselves in it again for a while. "I have missed you so much. I was hoping you would come looking for me," she said and again I wondered what she meant about looking for her.

"You mean in the fear landscape?" I asked. Then she cursed under her breath.

"He's coming, I don't have much time. Tobias listen to me carefully. The towns are part of a much bigger "experiment". Much bigger than even the Bureau thought they knew. I don't have time to explain. Just trust me. Leave it a week, then come back again," she said cryptically and tucked a piece of paper into my palm then I was in the room again and George was staring at me.

So many questions. Did she mean George was coming when she said "he"? What did she mean the town was part of something bigger than we thought? Is she trapped in the fear landscape? Or just in mine? Is she real or was I just hoping to see her? Was she in my fear landscape because I was scared that she actually was alive? Could I really wait a week to see her again? A whole week? My brain boggled at the questions but I forced my face to be composed as I acknowledged George.

"Hey George," I said and extracted myself from the chair, my left palm clenched.

"Four," he said and nodded a greeting. I stood up and shook his hand.

"How's the training going?" I asked him and we walked out of the room. As we do I subtly open my left hand. There was a piece of paper there. I quickly tuck it into my pocket. I will have to check it later.

"Pretty well thanks. Would you like to come and have a look at the new recruits?" he asked and I nodded but was querying his motives. He was making me feel like I had done something wrong. I felt better about it all when he said, "Sure I still can't tempt you to come on as a trainer?"

"The thought is tempting. I do miss it," I replied and he grinned. It was true, there was nothing like the rush of training someone or the smell of the training rooms. And it would mean I would have better access to the fear inducing serum of the Dauntless. But could I give up my aspirations of being a political leader in the hopes or the fear that Tris was somehow still alive? I left my answer at that so it wouldn't be thought of as strange if I did end up changing my mind. Maybe I could do both?

We made our way to the walkway that overlooks the pit and I looked down with pride. While the candidates no longer beat each other senseless for no reason, sparring was still a vital part of their training. They still needed to be able to defend themselves. I saw a blonde girl sparring against a partner of similar size and for a second my heart missed a beat. Then they both looked up and I could see it wasn't her.

"What do you think?" George asked me.

"A bit easily distracted," I joked, pointing out the fact they had noticed us watching and paused their training to look at us.

"Oh whatever," George replied and elbowed me in the side. "The guard we have at the moment are mostly ex-Dauntless and a few from the fringe but this mob are completely mixed. Now that they don't have to make one choice for life, and aren't scared of becoming Factionless, we seem to be getting some good results."

"Yeah it looks like it. I'm glad that it is becoming much more mixed though it does make sense for the first guard to be mostly ex-Dauntless. They were already trained," I replied, thinking aloud.

"That's what we thought," George replied laughing. "Was difficult with some of them to rope them in and make them less Dauntless and more aware of their actions instead of being so reckless like jumping off rooves," he said and I grinned though my face went red. I knew he was having a dig at how I had come into the facility this time.

"Yeah I know," I said.

"So Amar told me how often you used to go through your fear landscape. Why now?" George asked me. I decided to lie and focused on not biting the inside of my cheek as I had done all my life since copying Evelyn.

"I heard it was back and what to see if I was still Four," I replied and acted nonchalant.

"And?" George prompted.

"And I am," I said and grinned.

"Ha! Come check out the knife throwing," George said and though my heart skipped a beat remembering throwing the knives at Tris, I focused on maintaining a casual expression and followed him.

The scene was much different from when we were in here with Eric last when I through knives at Tris. It amazed me that she had been gone for so long and I still thought about her all the time despite trying to keep busy and distracted. So the initiates were lined up and each practised their throwing and aim. There were two that were in the completely wrong stance and missed their target every time. Without a moment's thought or hesitation, I began correcting them and was pleased with their steady improvement.

"Looks like I have myself a trainer," George said and slapped his hands together in delight.

"I don't know about that, but certainly looks like you need some good ones!"

"Well I've heard there are some new recruits and new trainers coming in from a town I hadn't yet heard of – Jericho? Maybe that will yield some promise," George said. I frowned. I hadn't heard of Jericho either.

"When is this happening?" I asked curiously.

"A few weeks I think. Christina knows more about it. Ask her," George said and shrugged. I would indeed. I wondered why she hadn't mentioned it. I also shrugged and after checking out the new sleeping quarters, headed home for dinner. As I was about to unlock my door, Alma stuck her head out and invited me to dinner. I politely accepted and followed her into her apartment.

Alma is my neighbour on the other side of Rosco (the history buff formerly from the Fringe). Alma's brown hair was in a tight bun, pulled back severely from her oval face. She was a few years older than me, and worked with Christina in assisting the movements and rehoming of members from the different "states". I sat down at the table as she served up.

"How was your day?" Alma asked me as she sat down. I think being ex-Amity, she lived for looking after people. Even if it was just feeding someone like me dinner. I saw her often looking after Rosco as well. And while Evelyn had lived here, they worked together often on Alma's garden.

"It was good," I replied absently as I picked at my plate. Perhaps it wasn't such a good idea to agree to dinner tonight when my mind was elsewhere. I actually just felt like sitting down and analysing everything that had happened today.

"And you had lunch with Christina?" she prompted. "How did that go? You two have been spending a lot of time together lately," she added and I looked up at her.

"It was fine. The food was delicious," I added and forced myself to keep my face composed. The café was a recent addition to Chicago and so far was very popular. They had a range of different cooked foods and of all the meals I had tasted so far, they were all very good.

"And Christina?" she prompted again. I began to wonder if it was Alma asking or Christina asking through Alma. This could become a very awkward situation.

"Christina is a great friend to me," I said, not really answering the question. Christina would never be anything more than a friend, particularly if there was any chance that Tris was coming back. But then, how could she? She was dead. I had zip lined to scatter her ashes on her behalf. I couldn't believe she would put me through that if she wasn't really dead. To save answering any more questions, even though I had no appetite, I forked some food into my mouth. Alma looked at me and I thought she was going to question me further, then left it. "How was your day Alma?"

"It was great thank you. I harvested some fruit today. Would you like to take some with you?" Alma replied.

"Only if you have enough, that would be lovely thank you," I replied and we finished dinner. She loaded me up with fruit and I quickly went back my apartment. I had almost forgotten the note in my pocket. How the hell did that come through the simulator?

I opened it, my heart thudding wildly in my chest.

"I love you Tobias. T x"

I sat down and cried for the second time that day.


	3. Chapter 3

Chapter 3

TOBIAS

"Come closer to me Tobias," Tris said quietly and I closed the distance between us until we felt as one, breathing the same air.

"Is that better?" I asked her lying flush against her, my arms wrapped around her tightly.

"Almost," she replied and pressed her lips to mine, sliding her hand under the edge of my shirt and over the tattoo on my back. I kissed the soft skin of her neck, just above her collarbone and she sighed my name. Her skin is just like I remember, tasting like salt, like a night run.

"I told you I'd never have pure motives again," I whisper in her ear and she shivered against me sighing. I felt a wicked smile creep across my face.

"I love you Tobias," she said and kissed me hard and I kissed her back, crushing her to me. There was nothing like the complete feeling I had when she was in my arms.

"Four," says a voice creeping into my consciousness. I look at Tris and the voice comes again but it isn't her voice, and she doesn't call me Four. Then I felt someone shaking my arm. "FOUR!" comes the voice, more insistent this time and I open my eyes. It was Zeke. I was asleep and dreaming about her. It felt so real. "You awake now?" he asks me, nudging me once more. I thought about punching him for pulling me away from her. But it wasn't his fault and it wasn't real. She was gone. Or was she?

"What's going on Zeke?" I asked, sitting up. It was dawn so light shone through the window.

"Did you go into the fear sim yesterday?" he asked and I narrowed my eyes at him. It wasn't common knowledge, but wasn't a secret either.

"Yes why?"

"I did yesterday as well. Wanted to remember what it was like," he said and paused, an emotion flicked across his face.

"And?" I prompted, feeling a little like Alma.

"Did you see her? Was she there?" he asks me, gripping my arms tightly.

"What do you mean Zeke?" I ask, feeling a little concerned. Then I remembered the other fear about Evelyn and the blue ornament and felt the need to move into another room, away from the ornament. I glanced at it then obscuring the movement, place a finger to my lips and say to Zeke, "Would you like a drink?" Zeke looked at me strangely.

"Sure, thanks," he replies and we both walk into the kitchen though Zeke looks completely on edge.

"See who Zeke?" I ask in a low voice. "I think you better explain."

"Tris and Uri. They were both in my landscape. Tris said she was waiting for you. She said to say that she always loved watching you jump into the train," Zeke said and I gasped. There was no way he could have known that. Only Caleb was there that day, and he didn't hear her. "She said that you would know it was her. She said that it was bigger and more corrupt than she imagined. Uri said much the same thing after she left. What's going on Four?"

"I don't know, but I think we both have to go back in there without calling attention to ourselves. Don't mention this to anyone. It seems something big is going on, just when we thought it had settled down."

"But I saw his body, we had him cremated. We scattered both their ashes Four. What the hell is this?"

"I don't know Zeke. But I have a feeling we need to keep this secret. If by some miracle they are both alive, they have gone to great lengths to stay hidden for so long before contacting us. I think we need to be careful."

"I agree. I haven't told anyone yet but I wanted to tell mum and Shauna," Zeke said.

"No," I said shaking my head. "No one. Not until we know what's going on," I add. I do trust Shauna and Hana, but I am not willing to risk Tris' potential life on the chance this got out and the wrong people found out.

"Ok agreed. So now what?" he asks.

"Now we wait. Tris asked me to go back in, in a week. Did Uriah give you any information?"

"Same, a week. So we wait." We both sigh. It was so cruel that it seemed they were both somehow alive and we both had to wait a week to see them. "Why did you shush me?" Zeke suddenly asked and I raised my head.

"One of my fears. Just a precaution," I reply because deep down, I don't really want to know if Evelyn is lying to me so I won't check the ornament. I just want to believe that she really has changed and really does love me as a mother should. But again, I am not willing to risk the chance at seeing Tris again on that hope or fear. "What have you got on today Zeke?" I ask, trying to add some normality into the conversation.

"To save myself from jumping in again, I am going to head out to the outskirts of the fringe and take a new patrol out there to show them what we do," he said and I could completely understand. I thought about going with him. If I was near the serum, I would want to put myself under again. Actually, if I could just get my hands on some, I could potentially do it at home. I didn't need to be hooked up to a monitor. Perhaps Zeke and I both could. That should add a level of safety to the equation. Perhaps I should speak to Cara.

"Would a political assistant be a welcome traveling companion?" I asked and he grinned at me. I tried to make occasional trips out there seem fairly regular so if I ever had a purpose for going there, it would remain undiscovered and not raise suspicion. So far I had managed about one or two trips a month. I supposed once a Dauntless, always a Dauntless. I was always thinking ahead about defence, strategies of survival and so on.

"If that political assistant is you Four, then definitely. I'll head out and get ready. We may be gone overnight. Leave at 9:00 sharp," Zeke said and for a moment we both stared at each other. "Let's just hug already," he says and we grin at each other. It reminded me of the day he helped me get Caleb out. And so we do.

"Let's hope they are out there," I say and we let each other go. He nods and then heads to the door.

"See you in a couple hours. Last carriage of the 9 train," he said and leaves. I nod, more to myself than him. I would be there. This would give me a chance to try and get my hands on some serum. Should I involve Cara?

I tried to think of a way I could ask Cara for the fear serum without raising suspicion. This was going to be difficult. I needed to think like Tris. I sat down and put my head in my hands. Tris was strong and brave and self sacrificing. I have learnt that I am also strong and brave. They say we are the sum of all our parts – our parents, our experiences, our love. For that I was whole, now I am not so sure. Without her, I haven't felt whole in a long time.

I take a deep breath. Cara would give it to me without hesitation if I asked her to. I won't need to make up a reason. She is my friend. Though if she thinks it is because I am not healing or trying to be a matyr, she may not. I think the key is being whole.

I get dressed and pack a pack with some belongings in case we are out there tomorrow and headed into the science building to see Cara and Caleb. There was something I needed to say to him too. I was pretty harsh with him when Tris died, blaming him as if he didn't already blame himself. And I had never apologised to him, nor absolved him of that. And knowing and loving Tris as I did, I knew better. She forgave me and everything I did. Zeke and Hana forgave me. It was time to let go of the hurt and look towards the future.

A part of me justified my sudden change in heart at the hopes of seeing Tris again. One more glance, one more kiss. One more anything. And so far in two days, though not real, I had had a fair few "one mores" and they still weren't enough. I had to try everything I could to get that back even if there was only the slightest chance.

"Hey Tobias," Caleb said as he looked up from the prototype he was working on. Caleb and Shauna had been working closely together on getting a working prototype of the brace he had made six months ago for her. She was getting more used to the technology and they were looking at the option of using an adaptaion of the serum to have her mind speak more directly to the brace to make it feel more like she was actually using her legs. Though they hadn't even come close to the testing stage of that serum. We were all still a little scared of where serum technology could take us after everything we had been through.

"Hey Caleb," I said and swallowed.

"Cara is in lab 3 if you want her," he said and I nodded. Come on Tobias. Get a grip.

"Actually Caleb I wanted to speak to you first. I wanted to say that I forgive you. It wasn't your fault that she died and you didn't. I hope you believe it now, but I realised I had never actually said it to you and that didn't seem right," I said and Caleb's jaw dropped open.

"I finally understand," he said and I wondered if I had heard him correctly.

"Understand what?"

"Why she loved you so intensely. And why she was a better person for having met you, and why she loved me," he said, his voice breaking with emotion. My eyes teared. Get a grip pansycake, I chastised myself. Yesterday you cried twice. That's enough. You have made peace with it. Now leave it at that!

"That's kind of you to say Caleb," I said and kept my voice even. "But it's true, it was never your fault. I am sorry I blamed you. I was just very upset," I added, not that it justified my outburst at the poor kid.

"I understand," he said again and we both left it at that. "Thanks," he added and I nodded at him and left. I hoped I hadn't brought back the hurt but it was important to me that he knew I no longer harboured a grudge. Things had continued to be tense between us and I wanted to heal that rift if I could. What was the point on making it painful for both of us when it could be a much more pleasant experience?

I walked into the next lab where Cara was half reading some textbook and half concocting something. She was covered in an apron, gloves and goggles. What on earth was she making?

"Hey Tobias," she said without looking up at me. "Just give me a sec, this is very delicate." I waited patiently and watched the smoking mixture turn from orange to crimson. Then the smoke stopped and she grinned up at me, taking off her goggles and gloves as she walked over to me. "You need to come and have a look at this," she said and dragged me over to the crimson stuff.

"What on earth is it?" I asked and she just grinned at me. I hadn't seen her this excited since the day we were working on truth serums before the fall of the bureau and they had been heavily tested on Tris, the only person who was able to lie under the truth serum.

"A stronger fear serum that will allow you more control on your surroundings and you should be almost able to contact her at will. She told me what I needed," she whispered the last bit. She meaning Tris? But how did she see Tris? Cara had never been in a fear landscape. She wasn't Dauntless nor was she interested in seeing what her fears were. It wasn't something she knew how to confront or need to. Was it?

"I wanted to know what it was like," she said and shrugged, seemingly understanding the question in my eyes. On one hand I was incredulous that so far, three people had seen her. Three people was already too many if she was in danger. But on the other hand, I was glad I had obviously trusted my instincts in coming here and they were correct in knowing Cara would help me. Cara pushed her glasses up on the bridge of her nose. She still hadn't given them up.

"And you saw her," I whispered.

"She said to tell you she always has a backup plan," Cara whispered back. It amazed me that Tris was sending me messages through others, to make sure that I knew it was her. She knew I would have trouble accepting this. But again, these are things that no one else could know. Could they?

"So what do you mean contact her at will?" I asked, still keeping my voice low.

"Well I am sure you remember the blue serum that the Erudite used to get Tris to turn herself in. It was a long lasting transmitter that they could activate at will though it was mostly dormant. This serum is similar in that it remains dormant until activated and returns dormant afterwards. You can communicate with her during its active stage."

"And how do I activate it?" I asked.

"You aren't going to like it," she replied and looked at me. "You have to be confronting your fears."

"Like ziplining," I said, my heart already beating rapidly.

"That would work."

"Has this been tested at all?" I asked her.

"No. I finished it as you were walking in. If she was wrong, or I am, this could have the ability to put you into your landscape permanently," Cara stated, matter of fact.

"Excellent. Let's do it," I replied. One way or another, I was going to see her again.

"Aren't you heading out with Zeke today?" she asked me, hesitating.

"Yes," I replied nodding. She probably did have a point. "Fine. When I get back, you have to inject me with it, or I will inject myself," I said sharply.

"Come see me the second you get back. I will be ready," she said and with our agreement reached, I left.


	4. Chapter 4

Chapter 4

TOBIAS

"Zeke we need to get back," I said. "We have been out here for six days! We are due to see them again. I can't have her thinking I am standing her up," I said, struggling to keep my voice down.

"I know Four, believe me I know! None of us realised how volatile the situation out here was," he replied and rubbed his forehead with his hand. We were on the brink of civil war. Apparently a proletariat group in Milwaukee had decided that the people of Chicago had it too easy and were spreading rumours throughout the Fringe about Chicago still not creating equality. They were calling themselves the Peoples' Revolutionists. Really they were the Peoples' Antagonists! They were so far recalcitrant, trying to force the hand of the people who were so far content with the changes occurring.

So now the Fringe wanted to be their own city, their own state, with their own government and police force and all the extras they now believed they were entitled to. They were pushing the thoughts that we were trying to push them out and eradicate them or make them slave labour for us.

Which don't get me wrong, I don't object to per se. But the people of the Fringe had government representatives. They could see that we weren't withholding information, or trying to force them out. We were constantly helping them. That was what the company that Christina worked for were doing. Helping them integrate and get set up in Milwaukee or Chicago or wherever they wanted to go.

Our presence out here had initially incensed the people of the Fringe and we spent the first three days trying to calm them down. We didn't sleep much those nights. It had calmed slightly but we still had a lot of work to do in trying to make sure that the Fringers weren't going to start attacking overnight with homemade weapons.

"I think we almost have this under control. Amar is on his way out here to take over with another squad and after your excellent example, another couple of government folks to help encourage the peace. Amar should be here in an hour or so. Then we can hand over and head back," Zeke said and I grinned.

"Excellent. I'll start packing," I said and left, feeling the butterflies in my stomach increase in the anticipation of seeing her. I hadn't dreamt about her since I had been here. Yet another reason why I wanted to get home. Perhaps there I could dream about her again. Anything to be with her. Already the obsession was driving me crazy. I did feel slightly sorry for Zeke, but we did need to get back. We had only expected to be gone a day, maybe two at most.

I finished packing then lay back on the bunk I had been sleeping on in the police building on the outskirts of the Fringe.

"Tobias," Tris said as she snuggled into me tighter. "I have missed this." I tightened my arms around her and kissed her forehead, right between her eyes then rested my forehead on hers.

"I've missed everything about you," I replied truthfully. "Even your annoyingly stubborn streak, always thinking you know best." She laughed and her breath tickled my face. Even though I knew we needed to talk and that time would be short, I couldn't help myself. I brought my lips to hers and kissed her hard. She surprised me by deepening the kiss then swung her leg over my lap. She looked down at me, her blonde hair looking like spun gold in this light and her eyes as clear as a summer's day. "I love you."

"I love you more," she said and leaned down and kissed me again. We kissed for a few minutes then she suddenly pulled back. "We gotta go," she said abruptly and I opened my eyes. I was still laying on my bunk. I sat up quickly then heard a noise outside my door.

"Four, are you ready?" It was Zeke.

"Yeah, I'll be right out," I said and grabbed my bag. Zeke and I drove back into Chicago with the squad we went out with. Amar had evidently replaced us while I had fallen asleep. And getting so caught up in the feeling of being with Tris, I hadn't asked her all the things I needed to know. I needed to get better control. Better focus.

"I'm going to head straight back into HQ to put myself in the landscape. It's a pity we can't go in together. I've never done that but it would probably be helpful. But I think it would draw too much attention if we both suddenly started going through them together all the time," Zeke said quietly and sighed. I looked into the back to make sure the others weren't listening but they all appeared to be asleep.

Perhaps this "upgraded" serum of Cara's could put us together. Though I wasn't sure I relished the idea of sharing Tris with anyone yet, even Zeke and Uriah. I was definitely not built for Abnegation. Though the Factions no longer existed and were too regimented, they worked to a degree. It enabled people to have a clear focus on what they wanted to achieve, and what their values were. For those who liked getting direction, it definitely gave them what they needed. Though I loved the new freedom now and I was looking forward to getting Tris back so she could see the new order.

"Cara has been developing an updated serum," I replied keeping my voice low. "It hasn't been tested yet and requires you to be facing your fears at the time. So I am going ziplining when we get back," I said and shuddered. I would test it out and perhaps once it had been injected, we could work on concentration over fear for activating it.

"You? Ziplining? I never thought you would do that again. I can meet you on top of the Hancock building if you want me to strap you in? Just give me time to get through the landscape while you meet with Cara?" he asked and I nodded. I hadn't even thought about how I was going to do it on my own so it was helpful to have someone who knew why I was going it and didn't suspect anything. We should be able to keep it quiet. The Dauntless tradition had been kept a Dauntless secret for years.

"Ok I will wait for you atop the Hancock building," I replied just as we pulled up outside my apartment block. Zeke let me out then continued to the Police HQ. I had a quick shower and dumped my gear then headed back out to meet Cara. She would still be at the labs no doubt. Caleb saw me and waved, rushing over to me.

"Have you heard anything?" he asked me anxiously. I looked at him curiously.

"Anything about what?"

"Oh you haven't heard," he said.

"Heard what?"

"Cara has disappeared! She's missing! She was working on some secret project and I heard some crashing coming from her lab but when I got in there, she was gone! The lab was trashed! I'm really worried about her. No one has heard a word from her since!" Caleb burst out emphatically.

"Caleb calm down, when did this happen?"

"Four days ago, I'm really worried Tobias!" he said again. He seemed particularly agitated. I wondered if there was something going on there. After everything that had happened, Susan, his former "friend" from Abnegation had chosen to move to Milwaukee. I think there had been too much happen for her to stay. But I was very worried as well. I wondered if it meant that Tris and Uriah were in danger. I needed to warn Zeke.

"I'm going to see what I can find out. Let me know if you hear anything!" I shouted and ran back out the door. Over half an hour had passed since Zeke had dropped me off. Do I head to the Hancock building as planned? Or out to Police HQ? I pulled out my phone and dialled in his number. It rang out. I cursed under my breath. I hadn't had a phone long, and was wondering the point of it when no one answered.

Hancock building I decided. Zeke would have heard about Cara and would head there to meet me. I hoped. I ran down there and jumped into the lift hitting for button for the hundredth floor and went out onto the roof.

"Zeke?" I said, hoping he was there. No one answered. I kept walking around to the zipline. "Zeke?"

"Four," finally came a response. Zeke was there, his face pale. "I heard about Cara. I'm worried they are in danger. I couldn't let myself go into the landscape."

"At least one of us will have to. Let's go back to my apartment and work out our next move. We will have to get our hands on the serum at some point anyway. We need to contact them."

"You mean this?" Zeke asked, finally grinning as he pulled vials of the serum out of his backpack.

"Glad you used your brains," I joked and we made our way back down the lift. We really needed somewhere we could go in secret, particularly if this was going as dangerously as it seemed. With Cara disappearing and the "secret formula" in who knows who's hands. That was a worrying thought with the not so distant past. Plus Cara's safety was paramount. I was concerned at who could have taken her and why. We walked in silence for a few minutes. "What do you know of Cara's disappearance?" I asked Zeke, wondering if the police force had any ideas.

"Not a lot. No one has claimed responsibility. It appears it was definitely some kind of abduction. The lab was trashed. All her notes and experiments were gone. The video footage was run on loop so there was no live taping. And had it not been for the noise, would possibly have gone unnoticed for some time. The only conclusions they have drawn is that she was taken via the back stairs through the service entrance. No one even knew it had a service entrance!" Zeke said throwing his hands up. "It hadn't been used on umpteen years and was boarded up until recently."

We finally approached my apartment building and started heading inside. Alma stuck her head out as we came up. "Hi Tobias, welcome back!" she said, greeting me warmly. "How are you Zeke?" she asked. Zeke had met her on a few occasions when visiting me. After we mended fences about Uriah's death, we would hang out occasionally.

"I'm great thanks," he said and we waved, heading into my apartment and locking the door behind us. Zeke must have remembered my warning about not saying anything because he chattered about random things, like the improvements of the knife throwers since I had been there, and how Hana was doing and the most recent girl who had stolen his heart (Vanessa, another political assistant like me though Vanessa was from the Fringe). Zeke continued his conversation as I quickly checked that the statue was in my bedroom and I closed my door and we went into the loungeroom.

"Shall we go in together, or do you want me to keep watch out here?" Zeke asked me.

"Perhaps I will go in first and if it's all good we can then both go in together?" I said after a moment. That was the safest option and I won't lie, it did give me a minute alone with her although this time we did need to focus.

"Sounds good," Zeke said and began setting up. "Be brave," he said using the old Dauntless line. I nodded and relaxed in the arm chair. Here we go. I closed my eyes and forced myself to focus on getting straight through the rest of the landscape to get to her. I struggled again at Evelyn but pushed on. There were more important things at stake.

I had tears streaming down my face, kneeling down on one knee after Evelyn had round two at me, bringing back to life every fear and every concern I had about not being "whole" or deserving of Tris. I struggled to get my breathing under control, resting my head in my arms over my knee. Suddenly arms wrapped around my waist from behind and I felt Tris rest her head on my back.

"I'm sorry you have to keep meeting me this way," she said and I slowly stood, bringing her with me then I turned so I was facing her.

"You're worth it," I murmured, pulling myself together. I had known what I was going to face. Each time with Evelyn did seem to get harder though. I kissed her quickly and then forced myself to focus. "Zeke is waiting," I said and she laughed.

"So are the others," she said mysteriously. "But they wanted to give us a second together first."

"The others?" I asked her and she laughed again.

"Go get Zeke. This time when you come back through think only of me. Think of me," she said and I opened my eyes.

"Let's go Zeke. They're waiting," I said and blushed, thinking about how I would have looked to him when I was kissing her, remembering belatedly that you can see the actions of a person while they are in their landscape.

"Well given you're Four, and my lowest is seven, we'll go through yours yeah?" Zeke asked me. For a second I hesitated. But he was right, it made sense to go through mine. Plus he already knew one of my fears. Wouldn't make a lot of difference if he knew the others. Plus Tris had said to think solely of her.

"Let's do it," I replied and we both injected the serum and went back in. I could feel the wind around me and feel the sway so I knew I was on top of the Ferris wheel. I thought back to climbing it with Tris the day we beat Eric's team at Capture the Flag. Thinking of her kept me calm and we quickly moved on to the squeezing box, with the walls compressing in on Zeke and I.

"Good job man, let's move on ay?" he asked, a touch nervous at our tight quarters. I thought about the day Tris had accompanied me in here and had manoeuvred her body around mine even then and forced me to face the reality that it was all in my mind. And so thinking of her, we moved on again. This time with Evelyn, I picked up the blue statue and rubbed where she had and there was no camera.

And then I was in her arms again and she held me tight to her.

"That was the fastest yet Tobias," she said, sounding so proud of me. I couldn't help it, audience or not, I had to kiss her. I pressed my lips to hers and expected to hear the wolf whistles of Uriah for every time he had seen us thus, that was his reaction. But when I pulled away and looked up, Uriah was lip locked with Marlene. Marlene? She was here too? Wait where was Zeke? Tris whistled and Uriah and Mar looked up sheepishly.

I looked around and saw Zeke staring at them in awe. Uriah rushed over and hugged Zeke and they both began talking a million miles a minute and finishing each other's sentences. "Are they always like this?" I asked and Tris laughed. Oh how I had missed that sound.

"No worse than us," she replied and took my hand and I linked our fingers as she pressed close to my side.

"Aren't you even going to say hello to me Four?" came a voice behind me. It couldn't be?


	5. Chapter 5

Chapter 5

TOBIAS

"Tori?" I asked as I spun around. Was everyone who had died in here? As I thought the question, Tris answered.

"There are only a few of us it seems, and we don't fully understand how it works in here yet but we are getting closer to answers. We can't tell you much yet and you will have to be careful on the outside. Things are getting more tense." Tris said, and lead me over to a large round table that was now in the middle of the room.

We each sat down and I thought about a fairy-tale that Marcus had surprisingly told me as a child on the rare days he wasn't beating me "for my own good". It was something to do with the Knights of the Roundtable where even the King was equal to his knights. Having no head of the table, no one outranked another. It made for clear discussion and plans to be concocted without political debates making the waters murky.

Tris sat next to me and held my hand. Uriah sat on her other side and Tori sat on my other side. Marlene sat on the other side of Uriah and in the blink of an eye, the table adjusted so it met up with us and we all sat together.

"Right so what is with the fear landscapes?" I asked, not really knowing where to start, but wanted to know exactly where they were. "Are you trapped in here? Is this just a way of communicating? Where are you?" I asked and looked at Tris for the answer. But it came from Tori.

"We are elsewhere. That's the best we can offer you at the moment. We are not trapped in here exactly but nor can we pack up our current location and come to you. This is the best way we can communicate and it is only going to be for a limited time. He gets closer to preventing this every day."

"He who?" Zeke asked.

"We can't say," Uriah answered. "The best we can offer is that He is someone who controls our current problem but not He who controls the whole problem." None of this was really answering our questions. Zeke and I were starting to get frustrated.

"So if we have a limited time, how are we going to make this work? What can we do?" I asked. We needed to establish some clear communication.

"You can keep doing what you are doing. Come back and see us and we will do what we can from here. The best we can offer is currently the fear landscape. It will enable us to visit you for the moment," Tris answered and squeezed my hand. It made me wonder about my dreams of her. Were they real too? We all went silent for a moment.

"So how are you all in here?" Zeke asked.

"The best we can offer is 'As a time-asymmetric event causes a warranted chain reaction, and so we be chosen'," replied Marlene, the most serious I had ever seen her. But that didn't make any sense. What did that even mean?

"Is there anyone else?" I asked.

"The best we can offer is the chosen are few," Tris answered again. I slammed my free hand on the table and Tris and Mar jumped, startled. The other hand was still clutched in Tris's hands tightly.

"Seriously guys? You get us both in here to play these word games? There is something big going on and you can't even tell us straight up what it is? And Cara is missing after your little escapade in dropping in to her fear landscape. Did you know that? She is in danger and you can't even give us one straight answer!" I said, my voice rose so that I was shouting by the end. I stood up and yanked my hand out of Tris' grasp and started walking away.

"Tobias wait," Tris said and chased after me. "Tobias, please!" Her heartfelt tone made me stop though I didn't turn to face her. She came around in front of my and grabbed hold of my face in her palms, forcing me to look at her. I sighed.

"What Tris?"

"Tobias, he is coming. I don't have long. We don't want to deceive you and I promise you will understand everything soon enough. Come back in tomorrow. Soon you won't need the landscape. I promise. You are becoming more perceptive in your dreams as well." She smiled at me. I reached up and placed my hands over her small ones.

"So it's real?" I asked, emotion making my voice crack.

"Yes. This is new!" she said fingering the tattoo of a double triskele on my wrist. It was the symbol of everlasting love and I had written with it 'My One True Love'. She would always have my heart. She looked behind her then back at me and said "I love you". Then Zeke and I were back in my loungeroom.

"Dammit!" I cursed and slammed my hand down on the arm rest of the chair.

"Come on Four, we need to focus. What was the line Mar said? Something about a time-asymmetric event and a chain reaction?"

I thought about that nonsensical line. "A time-asymmetric event causes a warranted chain reaction and so we be chosen," I replied. "Does that sound right to you?" He thought for a second then nodded. I could really use Cara's help in analysing this. She was the brain in the equation. While I had forgiven Caleb, I wasn't sure I could trust him with something like this so I dare not ask.

"What the hell is a time-asymmetric event?" Zeke asked, his voice rising. I put a finger to my lips and tried to keep him quiet.

"Ok let's analyse it. There's three parts to it – a time-asymmetric event, a chain reaction and the chosen. A chain reaction is something that occurs as a result like a drop in water ripples outwards. I could be wrong here but I'm guessing a time-asymmetric event has something to do with it occurring again despite changes in surroundings or something like that. So perhaps the 'chosen' are people who make the same event happen which causes the ripples?" I said, thinking aloud.

"That does tend to make sense. I would have thought then that the 'chosen' would come around once a generation or once a lifetime. Not twice in less than a decade," Zeke replied. I was surprised at his thought. I hadn't even thought about that. Was I lucky enough to get her twice in a lifetime? Did I deserve it?

"That's a point. Perhaps I'm wrong. Perhaps they are the ones that will create a change in an event? And perhaps they are back again now because there really is something afoot that needs to be changed now? As in they come back when they are needed instead of once a lifetime?" I mused. Then we both shrugged.

"Oh I forgot to tell you, Hana wants us there for dinner," Zeke said and I laughed. "Shauna, Caleb and Christina are coming as well." It was getting close to dinner time so we packed up. I was suspicious about leaving the serum at my apartment so we took it with us. It was dark when we got outside.

"Can we go by Cara's? I want to check out her apartment," I said and Zeke nodded. We caught the train into the middle of the city and walked from there. Cara had given me a key and at the time I had wondered why. Now I didn't care, it was useful. I unlocked the security door and we walked up the ten flights of stairs to her apartment.

I didn't need the key, the lock was broken and it was taped off. We ducked under the tape and went in. I tried the lights but they didn't work so out came our flashlights. The place was trashed. All her furniture was upended, all her belongings were scattered all over the floor. Everything that once had a place on a shelf or table was on the floor. It didn't look like much of it was broken or damaged though I noticed, just out of place. Well tipped up on the floor.

We moved silently through the apartment and into Cara's bedroom. Her clothes were all over the floor and her drawers were either half open with the contents on the floor, or the whole drawer was on the floor. Her mattress was tipped up but not slashed. There was so much out of place that either someone was looking for something or they were trying to make it look like they were but either way had presumably found it.

This concerned me as well. Things like this didn't happen in Chicago. Well hadn't yet. Could it be a disgruntled member of the fringe? Could it be someone from this People's Revolutionists? She was a scientist working on serums. Though was ours the only serum she was working on? And come to think of it, why wasn't Tris concerned with Cara's disappearance? All the signs pointed to someone malicious taking Cara. I doubted she was in safe hands. I hoped she was alright.

As we began leaving her room, I stepped to the side to let Zeke past me and heard the floor board squeak softly. Zeke stopped and looked at me and we both looked down as I removed my weight and placed it again with the board making the same sound. We both squatted down and used Zeke's pocket knife to pull up the board. Hidden in the dust was a note. I wondered how long it had been there. The paper looked fresh.

I opened it up as Zeke shone the flashlight over it. I blew off the dust that had accumulated inside the folded piece of paper. Zeke coughed in protest and I laughed.

"_Tobias,_

_Presumably it will be you curious enough to find this. We have Cara. While she is with us, she is in no danger and we are not a danger to you. Trust your instincts. We will be in touch soon._

_ForTris __ FourTris"_

A hasty line had been put through ForTris and FourTris replaced it. Zeke looked at the expression on my face and chuckled. There was so much we could take from the name. They were working for Tris? They were working for both of us? Presumably with the name of ForTris or FourTris they were on our side. Didn't give much away, which was just like Tris these days.

"Well, that's a relief," Zeke said. "I'm glad Cara is safe but I want to know who this new group is. Sounds just like Allegiant when they came out. Not surprised Cara is involved somehow, whether she knew it or not," Zeke said and again I was surprised at his insight. I had never realised how he wasn't just an atypical Dauntless. He was much for insightful and thoughtful than I had ever given him credit for. I had made it a habit over my lifetime to make quick judgments of people.

I had done it to Tris initially too, thinking she was pushed instead of being brave enough to be the first jumper. Thinking she wasn't tough enough to last through Dauntless training. Then thinking she was unable to be hurt and that my snubbing her at breakfast the first morning after we kissed wouldn't have affected her. I needed to be much more accepting of others. I had even done it to Christina, thinking her nothing but a loud mouth Candor. Which she was, but she was a lot more too. Speaking of Christina, we needed to get to Hana's before we drew too much attention to ourselves for hanging around here too long.

"I'm glad she's safe. Big weight off my mind knowing the new serum isn't in the wrong hands as well. The group obviously has something to do with Tris. We will have to ask her when we go in tomorrow," I said and we replaced the floor board and started moving out of the apartment. As we neared the door, we heard a noise and both flicked off the flashlights in an instant, moving to either side of the door so we could grab someone should they come in.

It wasn't noisy enough to just be a neighbour down the hall in my opinion so Zeke and I waited.

And waited.

And waited.

Nobody entered. My eyes had adjusted enough to the dim light that I motioned for Zeke to see if he could see anyone outside because he had a better view out the ajar door. He nodded then moved silently to have a peek. He flattened himself back against the wall and I could tell he had seen someone. A few seconds later I saw someone pushed open the door and ducked under the tape and entered, trying the light switch. When the light didn't come on, I heard the voice mutter something under its breath. I wondered who it was. I couldn't get a clear view of them.

Zeke and I waited silently as they crept further into the room, not having a flashlight. I looked at Zeke and he looked at me and silently counted to three on his fingers then we both flicked on the flashlights and shone them on the intruder.

"Caleb?!" Zeke and I said incredulously. He walked over to us.

"Tobias? Zeke? What are you two doing here?" he asked, seemingly shocked.

"I was accompanying this good police officer to check in on a friend's whereabouts," I replied and Caleb pulled a face to show he didn't entirely believe me. But he didn't question us.

"Why are you here?" Zeke asked him. Caleb looked a little sheepish.

"Wanted to check in on a friend's whereabouts," he replied, using my line. I looked at Zeke. I knew there was something else going on here but it wasn't really my place to question it. But it did make my suspicion about them being in a relationship a little more likely. "Did you find anything?" Zeke and I shook our heads and neither of us looked at each other to save calling attention to the face we were lying. Clearly neither of us were suited to Candor because Caleb accepted it without question though his face fell. I think he hoped we could shed some light on it but we couldn't at this juncture. If FourTris had wanted Caleb to know, they would have communicated with him.

"Well let's all get out of here. Mum wants us there for dinner," Zeke said and we left, pulling the door closed behind us. We walked back down to the overhead train line and Zeke and I climbed up the pylons without a moment's hesitation. After a beat, Caleb climbed them as well and joined us. I looked at my watch.

"How long?" Zeke asked and half a second later we heard the familiar rumble of the train and ran alongside it, pulling ourselves in. Caleb was reasonably used to this by now though he still wasn't very good at it and I knew had we not essentially forced him, he would have gone a different way to Hana's.

We jumped off the train near Hana's and walked the rest of the way with Caleb slightly limping though he never said anything or complained. I was guessing he had landed badly but didn't want to point it out to us who would not offer any sympathy. I guess old habits die hard. Zeke let us in when we got there and it was heart-warming to see Shauna standing in the kitchen with her leg braces on, cooking with Hana. Christina was watching them and chatting. She caught my eye and winked and I wondered again if this was going to get awkward.

I said hello to Hana, Shauna and Christina and then went into their loungeroom. Christina followed me in. "I have heard something about you Four."


	6. Chapter 6

Chapter 6

TOBIAS

Play it cool Tobias, I reminded myself. Play it cool. Don't react. I took a deep breath. "Did you now?" I asked, feigning nonchalance, my mind racing at what she could possibly know. Not about Tris. Not about Cara's serum – Christina and Cara had had a bit of a falling out when Christina had started dating a guy from the Fringe, Sam. It hadn't lasted long, but their friendship had never been the same.

"I certainly did," she replied, "And I bet you know what it is."

"No clue," I replied, unable to come up with something feasible unless it was about me going on as a Dauntless trainer, umm I mean Police trainer.

"You're lying. You know I can tell when you're lying," she replied and crossed her arms. I shrugged and feigned innocence. "Ok fine, I heard you are seeing someone," she said at last and I forced myself to not laugh. Seeing someone could be a good cover to "disappear" for periods of time while I was trying to see Tris.

"Where did you hear that?" I asked, trying to keep the smile from my face.

"Never you mind," she replied and the smile burst through. I couldn't help it. "It's true, I knew it!" she said and jabbed me in the shoulder. "Who is she?"

"Never **you** mind," I replied back, copying her words. I did wonder where she had heard it though. But it worked for me for now. Hopefully it wouldn't come back and bite me on the ass. Now that I knew it wasn't going to get awkward between us, I slung an arm over her shoulder. "Keep it between us for now," I said. I didn't want to have to answer questions about it all the time.

"Of course," she replied.

"What gave me away?" I asked.

"A few things," she said mysteriously. I looked at her for a minute but it seemed neither of us would spill so left it at that just as Shauna, Hana and Zeke came in from the kitchen with the food and laid it out on the table and we all sat down.

The Dauntless (or ex-Dauntless) didn't say prayers as we had in Abnegation, but I knew from previous experience that Hana and Zeke would bow their head for a second in thought and thanks before everyone dug in. "Cheers," said Zeke and we passed the food around.

"Cheers," I echoed. Given my new promise to myself about better observing people, I thought I would start tonight as I watched how Shauna and Zeke interacted with each other. Shauna's confidence had taken a severe nose-dive after the accident but since she was getting around so well now with the leg braces, she was starting to shine again. Not being able to work in Dauntless or something like it had been hard for her to take. And once she was able to run, dodge and jump again, perhaps she could look at being a trainer or something.

Zeke had trusted Shauna with the fact he was spying, and he was devastated when Shauna was fighting for her life after the bullet hit her. He was the first to get her to smile and laugh again after she recovered and she got over the whole Divergent thing. I remember that being harder on Tris than she cared to admit.

Zeke had always spent a lot of time with Shauna, even during our initiate days and I wondered now if I had missed something then. Although Zeke was always with other women and on dates while I was the odd one out always wondering what I had done to offend the friend I was meant to be keeping occupied. It wasn't until I became a trainer that I realised I had appeal. I had something other women wanted.

Something that Tris wanted.

"Sorry what was that?" I asked Hana, realising I had tuned out the conversation and she just asked me something.

"I asked about how the new transportation plan was going. I've heard that there is a major operation underway to improve the buses, trains and roads. And something about these planes as well?" Hana asked. She had been informed of the technology of their airplanes but had not yet seen one. I had been told by Christina that Uriah had really loved the sensation of flying. I was glad he was coming back. He was always such a joker.

"There certainly is. Johanna is an advocate improving all forms of communication between the sectors including the Fringe and Milwaukee and she sees the improvement of the transport system across the board, not just in Chicago, as a vital step in making this happen," I said, quite passionately.

"Sounds like the project was your idea?" Zeke said, this time absolutely stunning me with his insight. I had pushed the project before the 'People's Revolutionists' had come about and because the project had been highlighted as a priority beginning a month ago (and well publicised) it was currently going a long way to calming the population.

"It was actually," I replied and was surprised at how much I enjoyed admitting as much. I hadn't pushed many items of my own agenda, now what I considered important as yet as I was still the assistant and there was already so much to do. It all takes time.

"Good for you," Hana said smiling. She seemed to recognise the need I had to be and feel appreciated. Johanna was a great boss and an exceptional politician and definitely had the people as her priority, but it in no way diminished how much I wanted to see happen and the changes I wanted to see. Johanna and I had different priorities in how to best serve the people. So we didn't clash but it wasn't often that my priority projects were her priority projects. But she was by far the best person to learn from.

"Thanks," I replied. Thinking about these projects and the best way to move the city forward was the best way I knew to distract myself. But despite all of that, seeing Tris again had been an incredible experience. It wasn't awkward or unfamiliar. It was as if no time had passed. At the time I didn't even think about it but realistically it had been three years since I had seen her or spoken to her or kissed her – apart from in my mind. Although technically that is still what it was.

After dinner Hana brought out a chocolate cake that reminded me of the Dauntless cake but this was even more delicious. It was rich, moist and downright incredible to eat. And before I could even compliment the baker, Zeke jumped in.

"Thanks mum, this was the best cake yet. Better than Dauntless cake," Zeke said. And I saw Shauna blush. Interesting.

"Thanks son, but Shauna made it," Hana said. Shauna looked up at Zeke through her lashes and Hana smiled knowingly as Zeke blushed. Shauna cleared her throat then pinned me with a gaze.

"How is Matthew doing these days?" she asked.

"I haven't spoken to him in a while. Last I heard he was beginning to make a breakthrough in his research of memories. I have actually been meaning to go and see him. I might do that tomorrow," I replied. "Christina, do you still keep in touch with him?"

"Not as often as I would like. He's been rather elusive, losing himself in his research. I think he was hit by Tris' death harder than we believed. Either that or he was always a workaholic. But they did seem to get close very quickly," Christina replied and it was times like this I hated the Candor in her. Given that I had never cared for or loved anyone except for Tris, it was incredibly rare for me to get jealous. Now was one of those rare times. And it was also why Matthew and I never became as good friends as we probably otherwise would have – even in spite of my lack of Divergent genes and him being the one to let that bomb drop.

"I think the deaths of all our friends and family hit us all harder than we cared to admit," Hana said diplomatically after seeing the emotions flick across my face. Hana was Dauntless born and raised, as were her children so she was always very regal in her dealing with emotions. I admired that in her. She held herself to high standards and was always brave.

"Here, here," I said and we raised our glasses. A late toast to our fallen family.

"Have you heard about our new intake coming from Jericho?" Christina suddenly asked and reminded me.

"No, where is Jericho?" Zeke replied.

"Some place we haven't heard of. North Carolina? North Carolina? Apparently they have been doing training at an old military base – Fort Bragg?" Christina replied. I had read about the "States" since our reintegration into the country. Though I hadn't heard anything about a training centre out there, nor of any colonies.

"How many are coming?" Shauna asked.

"A contingent of ten so I hear," Christina replied. "They call themselves the Protectors," she added and I frowned slightly. Protectors of what?

"Protectors of what?" Zeke asked, echoing my thoughts.

"Yeah of what?" Shauna added.

"That's about all I know. They should be here in about a week so I hear. Permanent transfers?" she replied though the last part sounded like a question. Interesting, I thought. Perhaps I would come on to the Police Force as a trainer? No. I needed to concentrate on whatever this was with Tris as well as my career in trying to sort out the disgruntled members of the Fringe.

"Has there been any talk through your channels about the People's Revolutionists?" I asked Christina.

"I have heard of them. Word is spreading through the Fringe about them. I've heard there are flyers around stating that Chicago and the Bureau are creating its members to be able to be programmed and wiped at any time. Which when you think about the serums Erudite developed they probably aren't far wrong. Jeanine Matthews developed the serum which effectively implanted and programmed the people into doing what she wanted. Hell I was one that was programmed. And although we weren't wiped, sometimes I wish we were," Christina said and a tear ran down her cheek that she quickly wiped away.

"So they are saying that Chicago and the Bureau are using it as mind control?" Hana clarified. Christina nodded. "Don't they know what's been going on and how Chicago was used with the Factions?"

"They are claiming that the technology wasn't destroyed and that we have been trying to weaken them before we "implant" them to be who we want and do who we want. It isn't really that far-fetched," Christina added. That was true, but it wasn't as if that was our current focus. That had been a problem caused by an egocentric women who wanted to eradicate what made us human and make us her robots so she could rule the Factions.

"You're right it's not. But why focus their attack on Chicago? We have bent over backwards to change everything that had occurred and to make this a much more equal society. Christina works assisting those wishing to move here to the city. Zeke works with the police force to make sure the people are safe. Four works to make sure the right action is taken in government. What more do they want?" Shauna spoke passionately. I wondered if she had had a run in with someone who was focused on this. Christina on the other hand didn't seem so concerned about it all which surprised me given she was ex-Dauntless and we were taught to protect the people and ensure there were no riots or violence. To be brave.

"I think question should be more WHO started it than WHY," Caleb said. This was the first time he had weighed in on the conversation. I almost forgot he was sitting there with us. We all looked at him. "Well yes, the technology existed with the serums to do what they are talking about. And presumably even though it was destroyed, the people who created it would be able to do it again. And we all know what Tris did with the Bureau. People accepted the change because that was what they needed at the time and that was what gave them a greater sense of belonging and safety. So what has happened that would make them doubt that now? And who would want to make them doubt that now? Who has the most to gain from it?"

It amazed me that I never noticed this side of Caleb. Even when he was working against us, thinking he knew better about trusting the Erudite and turning in his sister. I had actually always thought of Caleb as book smart, not situationally smart. But he had an excellent point right now. We all stared at him in silence, contemplatively. I thought about sharing my views but something about Christina being there and her sudden distaste of everything that had been improved had me worried. But then, Tris trusted her implicitly. Perhaps I should too.

"Well perhaps we need to take another step back and look at who has gained the most from the new world order," I said and Caleb nodded.

"Good point. Johanna has certainly gained a lot. She was the unspoken leader of Amity but now she is akin to a ruler. Not that she is a dictator but she is probably one of the few who are closest to it. I would have said your mother Tobias, but she stepped down from power a long time ago and seems content to just be herself," Caleb said, thinking aloud.

"George and Amar have moved into a different kind of leadership position, controlling the police force. That would be a good advantage," Shauna added, choosing specifically to not single out Zeke who could almost be put in the same category.

"Ok so they seem to be the main three people who have gained a lot as a result of the changes, so who has the most to gain by seeing them taken out of the equation? Seeing them lose their power," Caleb said.

"Isn't that the question of the day?" Hana asked and Zeke and I snuck a look at each other. Question of the day? Hardly. If only she knew.

"That should give you some idea of where to start looking into it huh Zeke?" Shauna asked and Zeke nodded. "Perhaps you could look into it from your end too Four?" I nodded. And I would definitely go and see Matthew tomorrow.

"Thanks for dinner Hana, but I have to get back," Christina said as we finished dessert. Caleb nodded as well, looking at his watch. I think he wanted to get out of here before we made him jump on and off trains again.

"I should also be going. Thank you Hana," Caleb said and left with Christina with a wave to us and a sheepish smile. He still wasn't over being busted at Cara's.

"Four, can you please give me a hand to take these to the kitchen?" Hana asked and I looked at Zeke and Shaun.

"Definitely," I said and picked up a handful of plates and quickly left the room. But not without a sneaky glance back at the two of them.

"So, I've missed you," Zeke said quietly and then all I could hear was murmuring and dishes clanging as Hana began stacking the plates to wash. Damn.


	7. Chapter 7

Chapter 7

ZEKE

"I've missed you too," Shauna replied softly.

"We should hang out more often again," I said and mentally hit myself. Sounded too much like a friend. Well that was what we were. I was seeing another woman, Vanessa. Vanessa grew up in the Fringe and for the first time finally felt like she had found a place she belonged when she moved into the city and became a political assistant same as Four. She was a very attractive little fiery brunette who loved hot debates and always spoke her mind.

But Shauna and I had always just been friends. We had grown up together as Dauntless born and gone through our initiation together to become Dauntless. We had always been close, good friends. And we would never be anything else.

"Yeah definitely Zeke, you're a good friend," she replied and I began wondering if she was seeing anyone. I didn't know if she was but didn't think she was. But good friend… that was definitely telling me that we were only friends. I looked away.

"Great. I'm working tomorrow, but how about the next day? We will do something," I suggested and looked back at her.

"Sounds perfect," she said and we both sat there in awkward silence for a minute or two. Though it felt like much longer than that.

"Anything in particular you want to do?" I asked her, breaking the silence.

"No, I don't mind. Surprise me," she said and grinned and I couldn't help grinning back though I had absolutely no idea what to surprise her with. Perhaps something from the Fringe? Between the Fringe, the Bureau and Milwaukee, a lot of new "entertainment" had come in. There were more bands playing instruments and live music, there was a 'cinema' which showed movies that came from some other colony, there were even new card games, board games and the like.

That's what we'd do. She could come over and we could play a variety of games, getting out her fierce competitive streak then walk down to the park for lunch followed by a zip line through the city then completed with a home cooked meal for dinner. Sounds like a nice day actually.

"Come over to mine anytime after nine," I said still grinning, thinking how much she would enjoy the day. We hadn't done something like this in a while and I had some great new games that I knew she would love. Plus it wasn't anything too physical like train jumping or climbing or anything like that which I knew still gave her some grief and probably always would.

Then my mother and Four re-entered the room and Four said he was leaving. I still had the serum and we had agreed on the walk to Cara's that I should hang on to it because he thought he was being watched.

"I'll walk you out," I said and he nodded.

"Thank you again for the excellent food Hana, Shauna," he said and hugged each one saying goodbye.

"See you Four," they both said and went back to talking about clothes or something just as girly which surprised me. Shauna had never been much of a girly girl. But I didn't take too much notice. I needed to talk to Four.

"So I need to use tomorrow to look more into the People's Revolutionists and work out how we are going to calm the Fringe and probably groups in Chicago and Milwaukee. And I will try and find out more about the Protectors whoever they are," I said, telling him my plan for work the following day. He nodded, his mind ticking over.

"Good. I will see what I can find out through other channels and see if there's been any chatter about Johanna being a target though if we are right about the purpose of it all I don't think there's going to be a Public Service Announcement. If their aim is the downfall of the newly developed order then they aren't going to publicise that they are using the Fringe to achieve it," he replied and it made sense.

If the Fringe found out they were being used to achieve a hidden agenda, that would revolt and it would potentially end up more disastrous than the Faction war. There had already been too many casualties and we had been fighting too hard for too long to get this place into some kind of semblance of order where people felt safe again.

"Ok keep me posted. I will hang onto the serum. Your place tomorrow night?" I said and he nodded. Then I remembered I was supposed to be having dinner with Vanessa. "Actually can we make it late tomorrow? I have a date," I added and he laughed.

"With Shauna?" he asked.

"What?! No!" I replied a little too hastily. Four just raised an eyebrow at me and chuckled. "Vanessa and I are having dinner," I added to clarify.

"If you say so. See you later tomorrow night then. Don't leave it too late. I am already chomping at the bit. By the way, did the others say anything else after Tris and I left?" I thought back to it. Four had chucked a hissy fit, Tris had chased after him. "Will asked me about Christina, Tori about her brother. Then Uriah and Marlene were busy making out and then we were back in your loungeroom."

"Ok no worries. Right see you tomorrow," Four said and left. Uriah had also said it was about time I had settled down, as he had. But Four didn't need to know that. It surprised me because I always thought Uri would continue to be a party boy long after me. But he said "The heart wants what the heart wants."

I went back inside and started saying goodbye to Shauna and my mother.

"Walk me home?" Shauna asked and my mother tried to hide her smile though she wasn't very successful. I rolled my eyes at her but nodded at Shauna.

"Sure, you ready?" I asked and she smiled her shy smile. I wasn't used to seeing this side of her. Shauna said goodbye to my mother and we started out. I knew Shauna wasn't up to catching trains the Dauntless way so we started walking to the bus instead. It wasn't really that far to the Hancock building where we lived (in separate apartments) but I think Shauna still tired easily when she used her braces all day. When she realised we were heading to the bus she said,

"I'd rather walk. If that's ok?"

"Sure, we'll walk." Along the way she held my hand as if was a natural thing to do. I'd never noticed how small her hands were. She walked slowly so I knew her legs must be beginning to ache but I just altered my pace to suit her rather than point out any weakness. She chattered away at how much she missed wearing dresses with her legs like this and about how Caleb was still working closely with her create a new serum that will perhaps even convince her nerves they aren't damaged so she will be able to walk again.

She told me how the exercises were becoming easier but she missed her how legs used to look and said that showering was difficult with the braces off and annoying with them on. I tried not to picture her in the shower but it was a difficult thought to keep out of my mind. "You still have knockout legs Shauna, don't ever let anyone tell you otherwise. You're beautiful," I said gruffly and she looked up at me through her lashes again. I didn't like it when she doubted herself but I hated it when she looked at me like that. It made me want to kiss her. But we were just friends.

I looked away again and we walked in silence for a bit. "What did you think about Christina tonight?" she suddenly asked.

"What do you mean?" I asked, side-stepping her question and playing dumb.

"Do you think she has something to do with the Revolutionist group or perhaps she's just a sympathiser? She seems to agree with a lot of what they are saying, and the action they are calling her," Shauna said, clearly on team Chicago.

"Yeah I got that vibe too. I think Four may have as well. It's weird. After everything she did to help Tris get the message out and then with the Bureau I would have never thought she would shift alliances."

"I don't think she has shifted alliances. I think that's a bit harshly put. But perhaps she's more bitter about what she had to do under the serum than she let on. It was no picnic I know but that was dealt with and we all moved on," Shauna said seriously as we approached our building and started heading inside.

"That's possible. But I thought she had moved on as well. I've heard she has been pretty serious with someone for a while. Jacob or something?"

"Yeah she was telling me today that her and Jacob are looking at moving in together in a few weeks," Shauna said. That was news. I wondered if I should say something about Will coming back. I had heard they were very close when Will died and that she had taken a long time before even looking at someone again. I hoped it wasn't going to torment her too much, nice guy that I am.

We got into the lift and for the life of me, all I wanted to do was kiss Shauna. I'd never felt like this about her before. I was staring at her as we climbed each floor then she looked up at me, saw me looking and looked straight back down, leaning further away from me against the wall of the lift. I knew it. She didn't like me like that. Well no way was I going to bark up the wrong tree. Besides, I was dating Vanessa. There were a lot of things I liked about Ness.

I walked Shauna to her door, hastily said goodnight and left, heading to my apartment a few doors down. She seemed a little stunned at how abrupt I was but I was a little hurt she didn't seem even the slightest bit receptive. I left myself in and shut the door behind me, leaning back against it. I took a deep breath. Hopefully I hadn't made things too awkward. It would be alright, surely?

Then there was a slightly timid knock. It had to be Shauna. I opened the door and was surprised at who I saw. "Hector?! What are you doing here?" I asked. He was Shauna and Lynn's little brother. I wonder if Lynn is coming back too actually.

"Look I'm sorry for coming over so late and I know we don't really talk or anything but Shauna always said I could trust you with anything," he said as I lead him into the lounge room.

"I take it you can't go to Shauna about it?" I asked. He shook his head.

"I don't know what to do Zeke, I'm in bad trouble," he said and his lower lip began trembling. He seemed like he was a little kid again.

"Start at the beginning and tell me everything," I said, trying to calm the kid down. He's almost sixteen now and very tall and lean but really he is still a kid. Well I will always think of him as Shauna's kid brother.

"Well ok this guy approached me, told me he was working for a newspaper in Milwaukee and thought I would be a good person to make some enquiries for him given I was around during the Faction war and saw the effects of the serums then. And experienced the effects of the serum and had lived through it. And that he had heard they were in the process of developing something that would help Shauna walk again," Hector said, talking fast. Then he took a big breath. I had a feeling I could see where this was going. I just nodded for him to continue.

"So he asked me to start asking some questions about the serums and stuff. So I started talking to Cara about it. She was always nice to me after everything with Shauna and Lynn and the Allegiants. She told me she was working on a few different serums but if I went back to see her in a few days she would sit down with me and tell me what's currently being worked on and the progress they were making," he continued, then paused for breath again.

"Go on," I said, trying to keep my voice light. I wondered if this was where the Revolutionists were getting their information although if that's the case they were definitely hyping to up and making it far more sensaltionalised than it actually was. And I wondered if that was why Cara was taken and what they were looking for.

"So I reported this back to the guy who contacted me. Said he was making an information leaflet for people who wanted to come here from different colonies and saying that it was going to highlight the important work of the researchers of the former Erudite campaign. He said it was going to help educate people that not all new technology and developments were bad. So after I reported back, I heard about Cara go missing and I looked more into this guy and he never worked for any newspaper in Milwaukee or anywhere. No one had heard of him. It's my fault Cara is missing!" he said and buried his face in his hands.

I could relax slightly here, as I knew Cara wasn't in danger, but unfortunately I couldn't tell Hector. But I tried to reassure him. "Hector, don't blame yourself. It sounds plausible and there is much more going on than you realise. I am fairly certain that Cara is going to be ok. We are working on locating her. In the meantime, I want you to go down and see George tomorrow and ask him to organise a sketch of the man who contacted you. Don't give them any more information, just that I want this sketch. Ok?" I asked.

"Ok Zeke," he said, his voice wobbling slightly. "Am I in trouble?" he asked and I shook my head. The kid hadn't done anything wrong and could give us a nice lead into the Revolutionists with any luck.

"No Zeke, you may have even done us a favour," I replied and he sniffed then stood up.

"Will you be there tomorrow as well?" he asked and I nodded.

"Ok, I will see you then. Keep my sister safe ok? She's the only one I have left," he said and I shook his hand.

"Of course, you know I would never let anything happen to Shauna," I replied and he nodded. I saw him out then sat down again. I needed to tell Four, but it could wait until tomorrow. Right now I just needed a shower and some sleep.


	8. Chapter 8

Chapter 8

TOBIAS

"Tobias." Tris' voice was on the edge of my consciousness as I began drifting out of sleep. "Tobias I need to talk to you," she said again and I struggled to concentrate on her voice. "Tobias, for Pete's sake, focus!" she commanded and I chuckled aloud at how bossy she could be and how stubborn she was.

Chuckling aloud woke me up and I sighed. I bet that frustrated her and I surprised myself by feeling a little justified in making her frustrated. She had put me through so much, it was about time she didn't get it easily. Then again, that was a pretty harsh view. It can't have been easy for her to realise that she wasn't actually dead and had to come and face us all again. And I don't imagine it was easy for her to see Will again. Would he have blamed her? Would he have been vindictive about her taking him away from his life? I had never gotten to know Will but I was always grateful that he and Christina had kept her safe when I couldn't always while she was an initiate.

Now that I was awake, I knew I wasn't going to be able to concentrate enough to speak to Tris so I got up and showered and thought about all we had learnt and speculated so far. As the water cascaded over my back and the steam fogged up around me I felt myself relax. I rested my forehead against the tiles and breathed deeply.

I thought back over all the time I had spent with Tris. From the moment she was the first jumper – a blur of grey hurtling down to the net without screaming. The stubborn look in her face.

_All I could see was a blur of grey. A Stiff was the first jumper? I felt like my mouth had hit the floor. "Were you pushed?" I asked and she thrust her chin out, a stubborn look in her eyes. She looked so stern, so insistent.  
Beautiful.  
It was the first time I had really seen her, really looked at her. She was just there in her quiet beauty and self-confidence. So indignant.  
Magnificent._

The time I had spent training her as an initiate, my gratification as she improved. The time I had to throw knives at her, my heart pounding. One millimetre off and I could have really hurt her, then the hurt I felt when she accused me of being sadistic like Eric after I had nipped her ear.

_I had requested unsuccessfully that knife throwing be taken from the curriculum. I didn't think it served any purpose other than fueling the ever-growing Dauntless bravado. And I think at the time Eric chose to keep it, just to spite me. But in the end, it was a skill that Tris took to fantastically and that saved her life a number of times. But not enough._

_Despite him being a future psychopath and her being a Candor smart-mouth, Peter and Christina had been good. Tris had also been good which I was surprised at, as were her friends from what I overheard. After her lack of talent with the rifles, it made sense this was a surprising talent. Then the incident with Eric noticing Al's lack of finesse and Tris volunteering to step in front of the target. I had been very tempted to throw a knife at Eric, just to make myself feel better._

_I pushed her to be as strong as I could, playing on her Abnegation stubbornness, knowing she would rise to the occasion to be so spectacularly selfless. She always thought she wasn't selfless, and maybe she wasn't when it came to helping little old ladies carry their groceries, or giving to the Factionless. But when it came to saving the ones she loved she was always selfless. _

A protector. That thought struck something in me, but I ignored it.

_She frustrated me so much, while I waited for her to wake up to what I was doing, the only ways I could help her, and how I felt about her. And it did take a long time. She didn't understand that I had enjoyed holding her hand as much as she had holding mine the day before. And when we first kissed, I could feel her tense up and I remembered what it had been like when I first kissed a girl after being with the Abnegation. So I kissed her again to make sure that was all it was._

_So when she wrapped her arm around me and her hand up my neck into my hair, I had never felt such bliss. I felt I lost myself in her. _

I touched my lips as I reminisced about our first kiss.

"Tobias," Tris said again and startled me out of my reverie. Dammit. Well at least I now knew if I was relaxed enough and concentrated enough, something in me could contact something in her. I wondered if it was some kind of leftover transmitter from the Erudite or the Bureau. I supposed it had to be, I didn't believe in telepathy. This wasn't some fantasy world.

I tried again to lose myself in her, well thoughts of her, but wasn't able. Her voice had startled me and I couldn't get it out of my head enough to calm down. So I got dressed and went into work. Johanna was there in a meeting with someone with the door closed. It was a man I didn't recognise and there wasn't anything in her calendar. Plus she wasn't normally in this early.

I started doing some research on the People's Revolutionists and was surprised at the material I could find just in the stacks of junkmail that I didn't normally peruse. I started making a list on my notepad of things I wanted to chat to Zeke about so we could investigate them further. I had a feeling that should Tris and the other "chosen" ones came back, the Revolutionists would eat that up for breakfast, harping on in their sensationalistic manner.

Just then I heard Johanna's door open and pretended not to notice as the man left though I noticed a tattoo of a rose on the back of his neck.

"Is there something you want to tell me?" Johanna asked as she perched on the edge of my desk.

"What about, Johanna?" I asked.

"Your trip into the Fringe. Your initial report said there is a civil war brewing and I am not sure the treasury has enough in its coffers to support another war. The resurrection of Chicago after the Faction War nearly brought the city to its knees," she said dramatically. It wasn't like her to be quite so dramatic and it gave me the impression that whoever the man was, he had rattled her.

"Sure, but the Fringe has been slowly being de-escalated with the presence of myself, the police and a number of peacekeepers. We had the resolutions expert, Harold, dispatched in the first couple of days. He has been steadily regaining the influence and trust of the people in the Fringe and the Revolutionists are losing support. It is only a matter of time before it goes one way or the other and so far we are regaining control in the de-escalation of the Fringe," I said calmly, trying to reassure her.

She stared at me for a moment. "Good," she replied and got up abruptly. Yes, she was definitely rattled. Who was that guy?

"Johanna are you ok?" I asked and for a second I saw fear flash across her face.

"I'm fine," she said and went back into her office, shutting and locked the door behind her before drawing the blinds. That was a little concerning. Looks like Johanna may be the target after all. I decided to go and see Zeke now. We needed to get a better handle on the Revolutionists front to work out specifically where the danger was coming from.

I put all the information I had gathered into my bag and ran down to the tracks to jump the train again contemplating re-joining Dauntless, I mean, the police force. There really was nothing like the thrill of protecting the people, the adrenaline nor the smell of the training room. That was what had made me train initiates in the first place. I loved the smell of the training room and enjoyed working in intelligence because it always gave me an out.

And intelligence was what we needed now. I thought about FourTris as we rode the train. Who on earth could have been behind it? Not many from the city new about Tris and I as we were. For that had ended at the resetting of the Bureau and had begun at the start of the Faction war so the witnesses were few. They obviously knew enough about me to know that I would go looking at Cara's apartment myself to find the note.

After I entered the compound, I went straight in to see Zeke, hoping he would be in his office. But he wasn't. I tried calling him but he didn't answer. Where else would he be? I decided to drop in and see George while I was at it, and try and get some more information on the Protectors if he had any. He should have some kind of manifest about who was coming and their skillsets.

I knocked on his door and waited. "Yeah?" came the response a second later. I opened the door, and there was Hector sitting with George as George sketched.

"I didn't know you sketched?" I asked, but it made sense. Tori had always been good at drawing which was why she went into doing tattoos.

"Yes, runs in the family," George said absently as he adjusted something and showed it to Hector.

"Yes, that's it," Hector said. "Can I go now?" he asked and I got the feeling he was trying to hide something. He was normally quite bubbly but now he just seemed nervous or guilty, and was trying to escape before we asked him anything.

"Sure Hector," George replied. Hector started walking towards the door then paused as I stepped aside.

"You'll show that to Zeke right?" he asked and I wondered what Zeke knew.

"Certainly will Hec. Say hi to Shauna for me," George said and the kid nodded before making a swift exit.

"What's up with him?" I asked George.

"Don't know. Haven't seen him so fidgety before. Zeke apparently asked him to come in so I could do a sketch. Don't know anything more than that but I trust Zeke enough to do as he asks until I can extract the information from him," George answered. George covered over the sketch as I walked over to his desk to sit down. "Now what can I do for you?"

"Just wondering if you had any more information on our transfers? I heard they are called the Protectors," I said and George nodded.

"I don't have much more than that. Only have a date for them to come in. Two weeks tomorrow," he said.

"No personnel files?" I asked.

"Nothing. Not even their names," he replied and shrugged.

"Do you mind if I am here when they come in?" I asked and he shrugged again.

"Sure, if you want to be," George replied.

"Great, thanks. Do you know where Zeke is?" I asked and George shook his head.

"Haven't seen him yet this morning. I will let him know you dropped by," George said, effectively dismissing me. I took the hint and decided to go and see Matthew while I waited for Zeke to turn up. If I was right in guessing, Hector had visited Zeke last night which meant he was probably still asleep. But rather than running all over the city to find him, I'd get some other things done.

Matthew's building had been built and named the Millennium Institute since the new world order had come into being. It had been funded by the last of the Erudite treasury. The government had figured that Erudite had a debt to repay to the city in enhancing its knowledge and research across multiple areas to make up for the destruction and deaths of so many people. They hoped that this would encourage those of the intellectual sciences to return to work instead of fearing a backlash from the people after the Faction War.

I caught the bus over to the institute and waved at the receptionist as I headed up to Matthew's floor. There was another girl holding the fort at another reception desk as I made it to the eightieth floor. She was like a Dauntless warrior and wouldn't let me pass.

"I'm just here to see Matthew," I said again and she rolled her eyes at me.

"I will let him know you are here. Please take a seat," she said finally and I sat down and waited impatiently. I looked around. The building had been built with tinted windows and a lot of stainless steel, giving it a rather futuristic look. The reception area walls were black which contrasted with the glossy white furniture, bright fluorescent lights and the receptionists' purple hair and orange uniform. Odd choice of colours. Particularly hers.

I think I was waiting for a few minutes when Matthew emerged, rushing over to me.

"Tobias, how good to see you again. Please come in," he said in a rush of words, pumping my hand vigorously up and down before practically dragging me in to follow him. He seemed rather excited. "Now what can I do for you?" he asked and before I had time to answer he added, "You should see the work we are doing with memory. It's very exciting. I can't wait to show you. If only Tris was here. I know she would love it. We are making a number of breakthroughs as we come to understand how they are formed, stored and recalled. It's all rather fascinating." I bristled at the mention of Tris. I never liked how close he thought they were or how well he thought he knew her. But then I knew this was just the jealous part of me.

"Thanks for taking the time to see me Matthew," I said when he finally paused for breath. I had never quite seen him like this.

"Not at all, not at all. I was wondering when you would be curious enough to come and see the project we are working on," he said, seemingly starting to calm down.

"So how exactly does it work?" I asked as we finally made it to his office.

"We followed the concept of using a serum. So far we have been able to assist amnesia cases who presented after the blast you were involved in at the Bureau. There had been head traumas which resulted in the complete loss of memory," he said then paused and looked at me. I looked down guiltily. I still couldn't believe I didn't see the blast coming when Nita recruited me. He continued, "This serum has been vital in assisting the patients to reach past the trauma and access their memory bank in the hippocampus," Matthew explained. I had a feeling this was about to get technical.

"The serum works to stimulate the prefrontal cortex which is responsible for short and long term memories which are not task based, then connect it with the temporal lobe which assists in the processing of the stimuli produced by the prefrontal cortex. It enables the mind to process the complex stimuli of faces and scenes. Then we had to ensure the medial temporal lobe was activated effectively to ensure each of the specific organs like the hippocampus, amygdala, thalamus and so on were functioning together to create a real memory and not an imagined or warped image," he said and I nodded.

So far it made sense from the books I had read since the Faction War. I had told Tris that the tattoo on my back was about how I didn't want to be confined to one Faction or one value. I wanted to be brave, selfless, smart, kind and honest. So because I had been somewhat neglecting some of those values before the Faction war so I get stuck into some reading. The parts about memory I had mostly read because after Christina caught me trying to swallow the memory loss serum, I contemplated ways of forgetting. But she was right, I was a better person for having known and loved her. And been loved by her.

"We did encounter a problem where they weren't sure which were really memories," he said and I nodded.

"So how did you work out which were real?" I asked to show I was following so far. "Can you see the memories to judge if they are memories or fantasy?"

"No we can't see them. We didn't want to interfere with the memory integrity. We focused on ensuring the hippocampus was accurately recalling the memories and the balances were correct. Injecting the serum under MRI we could follow the memory's path to ensure it was all lighting up as it should and activating the correct centres of the brain in what we deduced to be the correct order and levels. As a result we believe we have it reasonably narrowed down. There is still room for error but is so far being helpful," Matthew concluded.

"Can it also determine what is real and what is fantasy once it becomes memory?" I asked.

"Interesting concept," Matthew replied and stroked his chin. "We hadn't considered that before but without getting too much into the science, it is possible. Given we have never tested it, we can't really ascertain what is truth. And given parameters that have no actual positive or negative," he paused and looked at me, "True or false if you will, then realistically it is impossible to determine the answer. The probabilities are infinite," he added.

Well there went that idea. I had asked to see if this whole thing with Tris in the fear landscape and my dreams, my subconscious, was real or if I was really just dreaming it. I was concerned that I was just dreaming it as a way of bringing her back. And if that was the case, I really was never going to let go. I had lost a part of me when I lost her.

"We can try it out," he said when he saw the crestfallen look on my face. "No harm can come to you, but I have been told it is all very vivid. Are you sure you want to?" he asked and I looked up at him. Did I?

"How likely will I be to be able to pinpoint what exactly I am looking for once I am under?" I asked. If it was vivid, there were definitely things from my past I didn't want to relive.

"No guarantees," Matthew said truthfully. "If your will is strong enough then it should help you. But given that majority of our subjects are searching for memories they are not sure are there, memories they don't know, they are essentially going in blind. The concept of knowing what you are looking for is different and changes the parameters of the serum," he explained.

"Well let's give it a go," I said and he nodded, leading me into another room adjoining his office. In it was a room that looked similar to the fear rooms at the compound.

"Lie back Tobias," he said and I acquiesced. He attached small electrode pads to each temple and two to my forehead. He then attached three leads to my chest and hips to monitor my heart rate and rhythm. Then he wrapped soft leather padded cuffs around my wrists and ankles.

"Is that necessary?" I asked and he nodded.

"Just a precaution," he said and checked I was securely strapped in. Then he asked, "Ready?" I nodded and he injected the green serum into my neck. "In sixty seconds you will be sorting through your hippocampus. Concentrate. We can debrief when you wake up," he said and I closed my eyes. Here we go, I thought.


	9. Chapter 9

Chapter 9

TOBIAS

"_Everyone will do just fine without me," she says and a shiver runs through my body. She couldn't leave me. _

"_Who cares about everyone?" I ask, "What about me?" My hands are trembling. Maybe I can make her stay. Stop her from giving herself over to the Erudite. I cross the room in two long strides and press my lips to hers. I can feel her lose herself in my kiss. Then she remembers what's going on and puts a hand on my chest to stop me. I can see guilt flick across her face. Guilt I now know is about Will mostly._

"_You would be fine," she said, not looking at me. "Not at first. But you would move on, and do what you have to," she said even though I know neither of us believe it. How could I be fine if she was gone? _

"_That's a lie," I say and kiss her again. She hesitates for a second before wrapping her arms around me, curling one around my neck. I walk backward, pulling her with me to the bed until I'm sitting and she's standing between my legs so we are eye to eye. I run my hands over her body from her cheeks to her hips. She kisses me and runs her hand under my shirt and over my skin, increasing my desire and I kiss her harder. _

_Suddenly we are both trying to get closer to each other, more skin on skin. I am about to lose control and I think she is to but I have to make her promise not to leave me. She is good for her word. She has to promise me. "Promise me," I whisper, "that you won't go. For me. Do this one thing for me." Again she hesitates. Do I not mean as much to her as she does to me?_

"_Okay," she says finally and I frown. I know she doesn't mean it. Yet._

"_Promise," I say again._

"_I promise," she says._

_We lay down in the bed and I wrap my arms around her tightly, holding her to me. I hope that now she has promised me she won't go, that she will stay. But something in me knows that she is going to leave despite her promises. But as I fall asleep, my grip loosens._

_I wake up and her side is empty. And cold. For a second I think she must be in the bathroom. And then it sinks in that her side is cold. She didn't just get out of bed. She's gone. To Erudite. "Nooooo," I yell, my voice hoarse. "Tris!" I scream even though it will do no head. I rip out of bed and throw my clothes on. I run down the hall to the weapons room and load up with guns, knives and ammunition. I will shoot everyone at Erudite headquarters if I have to._

"_Four, stop!" I hear someone yell but I am concentrating too much. Too angry. To devastated. "Four!" the voice says again as someone places a hand on my arm. Instinctively I grab the hand and force the wrist backwards and down to prevent them from moving because of the pain. If I push too hard I will break the wrist. "TOBIAS!" the voice yells and I finally look. It's Christina. I release her._

"_Christina, Tris is gone," I say and she narrows her eyes at me._

"_Stop shouting at me Four," she says._

"_I'm not," I say and pause. Ok I was shouting at her. "But she's gone," I say this time in a voice of normal volume. Christina just looks at me. "To give herself in to the Erudite," I add to clarify and a look of horror and guilt covers her face. "You knew!" I shout again._

"_Four, calm down. Think about how best to get her out. If you go in there guns blazing, you will both be killed. We need to think about this logically!" another voice says and I turn around. Uriah is there. _

"_But what if I never see her again?" I ask, crumbling. It's like being in the fear landscape. I am too scared to think clearly. My heart is hammering in my chest and I am hyperventilating, everything is going fuzzy and I feel dizzy. I force myself to slow my breathing down and concentrate on that as the others talk around me._

"_I have an idea," Uriah says and now calmer, we begin to forge a plan to get her out. I am going to have to go in. _

"Tobias," I hear a voice slip through my consciousness. "Tobias, concentrate on the memories you are looking for," the voice said. And I think. What memories am I looking for? What does he mean memories I'm looking for.

_A lone figure lies on the pavement. For a moment I think it is still moving, but then I realize that's because someone is rifling through its pockets. It's not a figure – it's a body._

"_Dead?" I say and the word is just an exhale._

"_Yep. If you can't defend yourself here, you won't last a night," Rafi replies. I can't fathom the idea that people move here by choice if the atmosphere is like this. I ask that of Rafi and he is quiet for so long that I think he hasn't heard me. Finally it isn't Rafi that replies, it's his guard._

"_Here, there's a chance that if you die, someone will care. In the cities if you get killed, no one will give a damn."_

"Come on Tobias, concentrate," the voice comes again and I think about what it said before. The memories I am looking my mind clears slightly. I am with Matthew, perusing my hippocampus. Ok Tobias, you wanted to know if the memories you have created of Tris in the landscape, that she's alive, you want to know if they are real or fantasy.

I think back to my fear landscape, the first time I saw her again. She told me she was wondering when I would go looking for her. I replay the discussion in my mind, and the feelings of her in my arms and her lips on mine.

I open my eyes and Matthew's concerned face is above me. "That was a pretty powerful memory you first had," he said. I nod, my heart still beating rapidly.

"So what's the verdict?" I asked.

"The second part, whatever you were remembering, as far as I can tell appears to be reality not fantasy. But like I said, this is not something we have ever tried before. This is all raw data so I couldn't really tell you either way. I could be wrong," he said and I nod. Matthew assisted me to sit up and I wiped the sweat off my brow.

"I don't think I like that," I said and Matthew laughed.

"I'm not really surprised. That was almost like watching the physical data of a fear landscape. What the hell were you remembering?" he asked.

"Tris giving herself over to the Erudite to be studied then executed," I replied. Matthew looked aghast. I don't think he had heard. And then given what actually happened with the Bureau, Tris agreeing to be studied and then essentially was executed, it hit a little close to home for both of us. "I had just woken up to find Tris gone, and realised what she had done."

"Well I can see why your mind and body reacted thus," Matthew replied and shook his head.

"Do you mind if I head off?" I asked him and he nodded.

"Can I keep the data?" Matthew asked.

"Definitely. Let me know if you come to any further conclusions," I said and shook his hand before leaving. I was still shaking as I walked back to the compound. Hopefully Zeke was back. I went back up to his office and he was there with the door closed. I knocked and he came and opened the door with the sketch I had seen George draw in hand. I still hadn't got a look at the sketch.

"Hey Four, are you ok?" Zeke asked me.

"Yeah why?" I asked, playing innocent.

"You look really pale and wiped out," he replied and I sighed.

"I was just visiting Matthew. Relived a memory I'd rather forget," I said and he nodded in understanding. "So what's with Hec and the sketch?" I asked.

"So, long story short. Hec was approached by this guy," Zeke said and thrust the sketch at me, "to investigate the work that Cara was doing on the serum. They thought he would have access to information because of Shauna. They convinced him they were from some publication who wanted to ensure the people understood what was going on, to help raise awareness for the good research that was being done. Then Cara disappeared and Hector felt responsible," Zeke said and I looked down at the sketch. I couldn't believe it.

"This guy was in Johanna's office this morning. When she came out, she looked really rattled and upset and more than just a little scared," I replied.

"Are you sure it's the same guy?" Zeke asked.

"Yes, definitely. Same eyes, hair, cheeks and chin. And he has a rose tattoo on the back of his neck," I said.

"I haven't heard anything about the tattoo but I will add that to his file. What was he doing with Johanna?"

"I think we were right in trying to work out targets for the Revolutionists. I think Johanna is their target in some way. He didn't seem to threaten her from what I could tell, but I didn't hear anything and she didn't say who he was. We will have to be careful in how we move forward with this," I replied and he nodded thoughtfully.

"Hmmm ok. I don't think Hector will mention it to anyone and sounds like it was done on the quiet. I am a little concerned about making sure you don't look too involved considering he saw you with Johanna. Do you recognise him?" he asked.

I looked again at the sketch. I didn't recognise him this morning. Had I seen him before? I tried to run my mind back over every face I'd seen. Wait! "It was Rafi's guard!" I say astounded.

"Who's guard? Wait, you know who it is?" Zeke asked.

"With the whole GD war on the Bureau, Rafi was the mastermind behind it that Nita was working with. This man was Rafi's guard," I explained and for a second I thought Zeke and I were going to fight about it again. We had made peace a while ago though occasionally there was still some awkwardness between us.

"Could Rafi be involved in it? Could he be behind this?" Zeke asked, all business.

"I could call the Bureau, see if Rafi is still locked up. Or you could," I replied. I remembered when they sentenced me to parole before they were reset that they had said Nita and Rafi would be sentenced to spending a good chunk of their life in prison. I doubted Rafi could be out already. Had someone else picked up the cause?

"It might be better if I do," Zeke answered and I nodded. Given I had been involved in the incident, I didn't know how much they would want to release that information to me. Plus as a police officer, if there had been an incident, Zeke had the reason to ask.

"Ok that's fine. Let me know what you find out," I said. I didn't really want to know about Nita. I still had never regretted anything so much in my life. Even in allowing Tris to be the one to stay here.

"Certainly will. Thoughts on how to proceed in the meantime?" Zeke asked.

"I suppose we need to clue in George and Amar, on this at least. It's not exactly a state secret. But I don't think we should be making public announcements that we have him as a suspect. Keep a low profile. Maybe we can tail him and see where he leads us?" I said, thinking aloud.

"That's not a bad idea. I will let you know after I have spoken to the others. Amar got back with his squad last night. Apparently it is all calm down there now," Zeke said. This was news to me. I wondered what that meant. It certainly was calmer by the time we left, but not quiet. Were they going underground to plan an attack? Is that why this guy was in the city?

"I'm sorry, what?" I asked. I had turned Zeke out.

"I asked if we are still on for tonight?"

"Yeah sounds fine to me. My place still?"

"Yep. Ok," Zeke said and looked at his watch, "I'm going to go and talk to these guys now then I better get ready for my date with Ness." I looked at my watch as well. It was late afternoon. Apparently I had been with Matthew for a lot longer than I had anticipated.

"Sounds good. See you tonight," I said and we both left, Zeke to find Amar and George, and me to head home and prepare to see Tris again. I had just walked in the door at home and put my stuff down when there was a knock at the door. It couldn't be Zeke… I wondered who it was.


	10. Chapter 10

Chapter 10

ZEKE

"George, Aram, we need to talk," I said and they nodded and followed me into my office.

"What's going on Zeke?" George asked.

"Have you got an update on this thing in the Fringe?" asked Aram.

"First, tell me your feelings on it from the time you arrived until the time you left," I asked Aram and they both narrowed their eyes at me waiting for the info but Aram acquiesced all the same.

"Well when we got there, there seemed to be a lot of tension among the folk in the Fringe. We spent half our time breaking up fights and trying to deescalate ridiculous arguments. They seemed to mostly be in the far west side of the Fringe. Then in the morning, it was like someone flicked a switch. There was no tension, no fights, nothing. We stayed half the day then headed back in after complete serenity," Aram answered. I didn't like the sound of that. It was as if they had kept us in the Fringe for a week to keep us busy, then someone has given the nod and it's all gone underground.

"And what impression did you get when you left? Were there still as many people milling around? Did anyone in the Fringe seem particularly nervous or grouping? Did you get the feeling that something was coming?" I asked.

"It all seemed fine when we left. That was why we left," Amar said defensively and I felt the need to justify my concerns and the reasons I was asking.

"Amar, I am not meaning that you missed something or you came back prematurely. We are just trying to get a handle on the origins of this group called the Revolutionists and prevent another civil war after the Faction War and the attack on the Bureau for the Purists war. This just seems to be going the same way," I explained. He seemed to settle. The whole while, George watched us both curiously.

"Well I did notice a bunch of people in groups but they always are," Amar replied. "Now that you mention it, crowd numbers did seem to be smaller by the time we left but I didn't get the feeling that something was coming. It did seem calm."

"I'm just wondering if they have gone underground," I explained again. "The reason is not only because of what happened in the Fringe, but one of the guys who planned the attack on the Bureau, his guard appears to be in the city and is seeking out information. He also appears to have put Johanna on edge. We don't know how he knows Johanna but are contemplating having him tailed," I said, giving them the information I was withholding. It was all starting to add up.

"Does this have anything to do with the sketch I drew?" George finally spoke.

"Yes, that's the guard. We don't have a name for him, but he is the one who was seen seeking information on the serums and with Johanna."

"I've seen him around as well. He came in to inspect the training in the compound a few days ago, while you guys were in the Fringe Zeke, posing as a reporter for a paper wanting to research training and recovery methods," George said and I looked at him aghast. So far everyone had been unassuming of this guy and he had been able to get in and glean information from almost everyone and in any area he wanted. "Don't worry, he got nowhere. We didn't let him in the compound," George said and laughed at the expression on my face.

"I think we need to be careful of this one," I answered.

"As do I. I like the idea of having him tailed," George said and I looked at Amar to get his opinion. He still seemed a bit miffed at the questions I asked him and I wondered if he was still feeling defensive.

"What are your thoughts?" I asked him, trying to get him back on side. He wasn't normally such a volatile personality.

"Yes sounds good to me. Let's tail him," Amar answered.

"Who wants to do it?" I asked. I didn't really have time. I was already running late for my date with Ness. I didn't think she was going to be happy.

"I can, I have a good image of what he looks like after sketching him," George said. "Do you want to join me?" he asked Amar and Amar nodded. I knew he and Amar were close. Hopefully George could help sort out whatever issue there was arising in the background.

"Excellent. Keep me posted?" I asked George and he nodded.

"Anything else I should know?" George asked.

"Well so far he has targeted the research facility for the serums and here for our 'training and recovery tactics'. Sounds like they are fishing to say we are training a new army under the serum? Similar to the army that Jeanine Matthews created for herself of the Dauntless? Maybe that's the tactic they are trying to use? Not sure where they would look next for evidence?" I said, thinking aloud.

"Perhaps the old Erudite building? Or the Bureau?" Amar replied thoughtfully and I was glad he no longer seemed to be defensive.

"That's definitely a possibility. If anyone needs to be in the know, can you call me and I will inform them?" I said and they nodded. We shook hands and they left. I raced home to shower and change to go out with Ness. I had just locked my door and was about to dash down the hallway to meet Ness for dinner, when Shauna stuck her head out.

"Hey Zeke," she said.

"Hey Shauna," I replied and tried not to look anxious about the time. I forced myself not to look at my watch.

"You going out?" she asked and I nodded. "You look great," she said and then blushed and looked away.

"Thanks. Heading out for dinner," I explained and she nodded. "Are we still on for tomorrow?" I asked her and she grinned at me.

"Definitely. I wouldn't let you out of it that easily!"

"Perfect. See you then?" I said, essentially asking her to allow me to go.

"Sure, but can you do me a favour before you go?" she asked.

"Anything, what's up?"

"Look this is really silly and I don't want to ask, but the curtains have come off in my bedroom. Can you rehang them? I can't climb chairs or ladders properly with these braces," she said, gesturing her legs. I knew it would have been hard for her to ask. She never liked showing any kind of weakness and I was still amazed at how positive she had remained after the accident.

"Not a problem at all Shauna, I'd love to," I said and followed her into her apartment. She lead me into her bedroom and I realised I had never been in here before. I tried not to be nosey and peering at everything while I was there. But I noticed that her bed was neatly made and her room had a strangely homely but minimalistic look. It was what I had pictured for her (yes I admit, I have pictured her in her bedroom before). The main "clutter" that she had was about a metre squared board covered in photos of all of us. I noticed a few of us together but refused to read into it after yesterday. I mean there were photos of everyone.

I climbed up onto the chair and rehung her curtains for her as she passed up the curtains and the clips. Slowly, we rehung each loop and I adjusted them so they sat properly.

"Thanks Zeke," she said and hugged me after I climbed down. She smelt amazing.

"No problems," I said and feigned a non-committal shrug. "I better get going," I said reluctantly and she nodded.

"See you early tomorrow?" she asked and I nodded. We said goodbye and I left, racing down to the restaurant where I was meeting Ness. She was seated when I arrived and she looked unimpressed at having to wait but she stood up as I approached the table.

"Sorry I'm late," I said, going around to her. I leant in to kiss her. She kissed my lips then pulled back and narrowed her eyes as we both sat.

"Where were you?" she asked.

"I got held up leaving the compound. George and Amar and I had to debrief about the Fringe," I said, answering honestly. That was the main reason I was running late. It had just been added to by Shauna. I was never suited to Candor.

"Then who's perfume are you wearing?" she asked, sitting back and crossing her arms.

"No one's," I replied. I wasn't wearing anyone's perfume.

"Don't lie Zeke, the look doesn't become you," she replied and I could see the fire in her eyes.

"I helped Shauna hang some curtains and she hugged me goodbye. I'm not wearing anyone's perfume," I replied again. She knew Shauna and I were friends and that we lived in the same building.

"Fine," she said and changed the subject. "How was your day?" she asked.

"You look great by the way," I said. She had obviously put in a lot of effort. She had a lovely dark purple dress on which complemented her dark features. Purple was a fairly new fashion colour for us in the city, we were used to the colours of the factions. So purples and greens in particular still stood out a lot.

"Thank you," she murmured. "So your day?" she asked again.

"It was quite busy. Following up on some leads about a few cases," I answered vaguely. "How was your day?" I asked her.

"Well something is going on in the government. There have been a few political leaders who have backed down from their upcoming policies and changed focus. Not really sure why," Ness answered. I wondered if it had something to do with the Revolutionists putting pressure on them.

"What have they changed on?" I asked, genuinely interested. I wondered how much further than Johanna this had already reached.

"Well they were initially focused more on Chicago, on upgrading services and implementing new policies. But now they seem to be more focused on communal ideas and projects to enhance the Fringe and networks with Milwaukee," she said and shrugged. She didn't seem opposed to the ideas or she would be up in arms about it. She loved a good debate. "It all seems to be of benefit in the long run."

"Fair enough," I replied and didn't push it. I didn't want to appear too interested in it or she would suspect I knew something about it. So she continued telling me about what had happened in the time I was in the Fringe including how she had met this girl who was ex-Dauntless and was going to meet up with her to go ziplining in a couple of weeks. I laughed at that. I couldn't picture Ness ziplining. I am not sure she actually knew what it is.

"What's so funny?" she asked me.

"Just can't picture you ziplining. Do you know what it is?" I asked.

"It'll be fine," she replied and didn't answer my question. I let it go. And she continued talking as the meals were brought out. As dessert came out, she asked me, "Do you want to come over and stay at mine tonight?"

"I would love to Ness, but I can't. I am meeting Tobias to work on something," I replied.

"Something to do with Cara?" she asked me. It was common knowledge that Cara was missing. This would serve a good excuse.

"Yeah we want to try and work out some leads to follow. Trying to think outside the square," I replied and she nodded, accepting my reasons. Though she looked pretty disappointed. It had been a while since we had even kissed. I felt like the passion was lacking. Wasn't really feeling it lately and I wasn't sure why. It wasn't because of Shauna, it wasn't.

"Ok. I'm worried about her. I like her. I hope you find her," Ness replied and I nodded.

I looked up and saw a few couples dancing. "Dance with me?" I asked, spontaneously. She looked at me for a while then finally agreed. I took her hand and lead her onto the dance floor and cradled her to my chest. See, I could be romantic. It wasn't all about sex. But it was too.

"Zeke… I… " Ness started saying and pulled away from me.

"What's wrong babe?" I asked her.

"I can't do this anymore. I tried to pretend that it is still the same but neither of us are. We aren't right for each other," she said and some strange part of me felt relieved.

"Is that how you really feel?" I asked her and she paused for a moment and looked at me. Then nodded decidedly.

"We both know it was never going to work. Not while you love Shauna," she said and we walked back over to the table. Love Shauna? But I didn't.

"I don't," I started saying and she cut me off.

"Zeke, don't. You may not admit it to her, or even yourself. But you love Shauna. You light up when she's around and even at just the mention of her name. You look around for her when we are at parties. Your voice changes when you talk about her. You chose to be late on our date to do something for her, even just spend time with her. Let's not pretend this is something it's not. The sooner you admit to yourself how you feel about her, the sooner you two can live happily ever after," Ness said and I thought about her words. Did I love Shauna?

"I think the reason you haven't admitted to yourself how you feel, is that you are worried if you start something with her you will mess it up and lose her. Man up Zeke, and admit it," Ness added then she kissed me on the cheek and left. I sat there for a few minutes, thinking. I didn't think she was right. But it did make me feel slightly better about spending the day with Shauna when I wasn't in a relationship.


	11. Chapter 11

Chapter 11

TOBIAS

"Christina?! What are you doing here?" I asked, surprised.

"I hear you went to see Matthew today," she said, ignoring my question and inviting herself into my apartment.

"Yeah I did. Wanted to chat with him and see how he was going," I replied. She knew I had planned to go see him so I wasn't sure where she was going with this.

"And is it true about his memory serum?" she asked, fishing for something.

"Is what true?" I asked, deferring her question with a question.

"That they can manipulate memories. Take away memories and input what they want you to believe? Kind of like what Tris did at the Bureau in wiping their memories, but this takes it one step further, to be able to implant memories they want so the recipient actually believes it to be genuinely true. Rather than us having to convince them of a circumstance," Christina answered and I didn't like the idea that that was possible.

If that was true, it could have very wide reaching repercussions. The thought of this getting into the wrong hands was sickening. I shuddered to think at what someone like Jeanine could have done with the technology. Matthew hadn't mentioned it. Was it possible? Matthew wasn't working on something like this. Surely?!

"No, it's not true. Matthew is working on assisting the recovery of memories, not the alteration of. The serum is a passive stimulant of the hippocampus and surrounding areas which enable the person to push past the trauma or void that is making them forget. It is not an aggressive serum like Jeanine's were. This works to revive memories, not replace them," I said, finding myself defending Matthew and his research.

"Are you sure?" she asked me, crossing her arms over her chest. I hoped I was wrong about the feeling I was getting about Christina in that she was believing the rubbish that the Revolutionists were putting out.

"Of course I am sure. If you're concerned, why don't you go and see Matthew so he can fill you in on his projects. He's quite excited about them," I answered.

"That won't be necessary. I'm glad," she replied but didn't sound very happy about it.

"How was your day?" I asked, changing the subject. We were friends. It all seemed to have changed within a couple of days, but it was about time I got this back on track.

"It was good. I've been able to get out and about a bit more lately with work so I am enjoying the change," she answered and we went and sat on the lounge.

"That's good. Sounds like it's becoming more varied. What are you getting out and about doing?" I asked, curious.

"Just interviews and visiting clients," she answered vaguely. I didn't push. We both seemed to be suspicious of each other.

"Sounds interesting. Been out ziplining lately?" I asked, surprised at the fact I was struggling to make conversation with her.

"Not recent. But a bunch of us will be getting together to go in a week or so. Did you want to come?" she asked politely and I shook my head emphatically.

"No thank you. Once was enough," I said and she grinned at me.

"Once is definitely not enough!" she said and laughed. "I love the rush even still!" This was the Christina I knew. And this was the Christina who helped me make it through the loss of Tris. "So tell me about this girl you're seeing," she said and I cursed inwardly.

"What do you want to know?" I asked, hedging. I had to skirt the truth.

"Do I know her?" she asked.

"I'm not sure," I replied and she narrowed her eyes at me.

"How old is she? Hair colour, eye colour etcetera," she asked.

"She's nineteen," or would be I mentally added, "and has blonde hair and sky blue eyes," I added and noticed my voice started getting a little dreamy. I really missed Tris.

"And you're crazy about her," Christina added smiling. I think she thought I must finally be over Tris.

"Yeah, I am," I answered without hesitation.

"Good. I've been thinking about Will a lot lately," Christina said.

"Oh really?" I asked. I wondered if she knew he was coming back.

"Yeah, about how much he changed me in such a short time. How much he meant to me," she said and her voice faltered slightly. "If not for that damn serum," she said and her voice started taking an angry undertone. I had almost thought we were back to how we were but perhaps her resentment at the way Will had died had resurfaced with a vengeance.

"It's good that you can focus on the positives," I said, ignoring her last comment.

"Yeah," she replied and we sat in silence for a few minutes. "So I was thinking that we should have a bit of a reunion," Christina announced suddenly.

"A reunion?" I asked.

"Yeah like get some of the old boys and girls together and go down to the old grounds and have a capture the flag activity. Minus the guns. Add in a picnic beforehand. Something different and fun," she explained.

"I like that idea. We should start planning it," I said, slightly excited at the prospect. I had actually always enjoyed the games and it was true I missed it just a little bit. And so the next couple of hours went by quickly and Christina seemed like her old self, not the bitter thing she seemed to be lately, full of hate and vengeance. I hoped she wasn't going to turn out like Tori in this way who had been driven entirely by her want of revenge against Jeanine Matthews.

"I should probably go," she said, it was quite late and I was surprised Zeke wasn't here yet.

"Thanks for coming over," I said, walking her to the door. "It's been fun."

"Yeah it has. Hey," she said, turning and placing a hand on my arm, "have you seen that person on the street who you thought was Tris again?" she asked, seemingly concerned.

"No," I replied, which was the truth. I hadn't seen her again on the street.

"Well that's good I guess," she said sighing. It seemed she was as disappointed as I with the answer. Perhaps she still missed Tris a lot as well, which probably added to her current anger when she wasn't nostalgic.

"Yeah I guess," I replied and we shared a look.

"Bye Four, see you later," she said and left. I closed the door and sat back down on the lounge and waited for Zeke to come over. I leaned my head back and closed my eyes. I think I must have nodded off because next thing I knew, Zeke was knocking on my door a couple of hours later.

"Hey Zeke," I said and stood aside to allow him to pass. He didn't say anything as he walked past me. "You ok?" I asked and he looked at me.

"Ness broke up with me," he said in a monotone.

"And how do you feel about that?" I asked him.

"I actually don't know," he replied and we sat down on the lounge. Then he seemed to snap out of his funk as he remembered why he was here. "You ready?" he asked me and I laughed.

"Born ready," I replied and he got it ready.

"Are you going in first again?" he asked and I shrugged. We could use my landscape or his and I could go in first or we could just go together. "I think you should go in first again," he said and I nodded.

"Sure, see you soon," I said as I injected the serum and closed my eyes.

Nothing happened.

I waited for the wind of being atop the Hancock building.

Nothing.

I waited for the walls to come crashing in on me.

Nothing.

I opened my eyes and looked at Zeke, but Zeke wasn't there. I looked around. I was still in my apartment. I stood up and walked into the bedroom. Tris was asleep in my bed again.

"Tris?" I said as I walked over to the bed. She stirred and opened her eyes.

"Hey," she said groggily, grinding sleep from her eyes. I sat on the bed and she smiled up at me. "Come here," she said and pulled me down to her. I slipped under the blanket and cradled her to me. She was so warm as she snuggled into my chest. "I love you," she murmured.

"I know," I said back and wondered where this was going. This didn't seem to be the aware Tris who was waiting for me in the landscape. But this wasn't my fear landscape either. Was it? I hugged her tightly to me and she looked up at me and kissed me. Something changed and she kissed me hard, reaching for my shirt and tugging it up and over my head. I pulled her shirt off and relished the sweet sensation of her skin against mine.

I ran my hands up over her and she shivered and sighed against me. I kissed her neck and down her shoulder. "Tobias," she murmured. I was about to lose control in five… four… three… "Maybe we better slow down," she said and I chuckled. I snuggled back into her and we were so content and warm, that we fell asleep.

Banging. I could hear banging. It was coming from inside my skull. No wait, it was coming from outside. I opened my eyes. I was in bed with Tris and she looked around, startled.

"What's that?" she asked and I shook my head.

"I don't know," I answered and we both got up quietly, looking around. The noise was coming from two sources. One sounded like gunfire coming from the street, and one sounded like someone pounding on the door. Tris looked at me and we shared a look, then we moved silently over to check out the scene outside the window, hopefully without being seen.

There were people running everywhere and a number of randomly dressed people chasing them down with guns. Tris and I both watched in horror as a man dressed all in grey, chased down a woman running with a small child, and killed them in cold blood. Tris gasped and I shuddered. I grabbed her hand. What the hell was going on? Someone was still pounding on the door.

I was about to go and see who it was when the man in grey looked up at us and without a second's hesitation, fired up at us. Before we could even drop to the floor, glass shattered, raining down on us and I felt something warm and wet hit my face. We both dropped to the floor and I looked at Tris and screamed. She'd been shot in the skull. There was blood everywhere.

"Four!" shouted Zeke, shaking me. I screamed again and opened my eyes, blinking rapidly as tears ran down my face. "Tobias, calm down!" Zeke said emphatically. "Whatever you saw, wasn't real!"

"What?" I asked him, gulping in deep breaths. "She's not?" I asked and I couldn't even speak the sentence.

"Four, calm down," he said soothingly this time and I focused on my breathing. In. Out. In. Out. "What happened?" he asked me and I shook my head, brushing the tears from my cheeks. "It was only your fear landscape. It's all ok," Zeke said, rubbing my shoulder.

"Oh my God," I said, still struggling to get a grip on my emotions. It felt so real. It was unlike any other fear landscape I had ever been in. Minutes passed as we sat in silence and I forced myself to pull myself together.

"What happened?" Zeke asked me again, softly this time. Probably hoping it wouldn't turn me into a blubbering wreck again.

"It wasn't like any other fear landscape I have ever been in. I may not be a true Divergent, but I know when I'm in a simulation. This one was so different. Tris was there, and I forgot I was in a sim and we fell asleep. I woke up to some kind of alternate reality where there were people with guns chasing down and murdering people in cold blood. And Tris was shot," I said and my voice faltered. "It felt so real Zeke. I know they normally do, but this was so different!"

"Wow. That sounds very deceiving. This is still the same batch of the serum, so I'm not sure what happened," Zeke said, analysing the why instead of the what. He paused and looked at me. "Do you want to try again?"

"Yes," I said without hesitation. Now I needed to know she was ok.

"Are you sure?" Zeke asked me and I nodded.

"If it happens again, pull me back out," I said and he nodded. I injected the serum and closed my eyes. When I opened them, it was pitch black. I brought my hand up in front of my face and couldn't see it, it was that dark.

"Hello?" I asked and my voice echoed. But I couldn't hear any other sounds. My feet were on solid ground and I walked hesitantly forwards with my hands out on front of me. If I was in a room, hopefully there would be a light switch.

"Tobias, concentrate," said Tris and I looked around in the dark for her. If I was in a simulation, I could do what she had always done, and pictured what I wanted. There WILL be a lightswitch, just in front of me. I reached out and hit a wall. I ran my hands over it and found a switch and flicked it on and suddenly the room was flooded with bright light and there she was next to me.

"Oh my God," I said again and crushed her to me. "What the hell is going on?" I asked her.

"It's being changed by someone external," she said. "Try to stay calm and focus on me," she said soothingly. "It's going to push you beyond your boundaries. Just keep trying to remember why you are here."

"I'm trying. But it was so real," I said and run my hands over her to check she was here, and whole, and alive.

"I'm ok Tobias, I'm ok. And so are you," she said and pressed her lips to mine and we kissed for a few minutes.

"What can we do?" I asked her and we parted as I rest my forehead on hers, breathing in her air.

"Nothing at the moment. We are coming. You have to be patient," she answered and I started getting frustrated again. So few real answers. So little information. She hugged me tighter, feeling me bristle. "I love you Tobias," she said and put her hand on my cheek.

"I know. I love you too," I said and she grinned at me.

"Is Zeke coming?"

"Not yet," I answered and she kissed me, clutching me to her.

"I miss you so much," she said and sighed. "I can't wait to see you again. But you better get Zeke," she said, reluctantly and I sighed then nodded.

"Wait for me," I said as we let go of each other.

"Eternally," she said and blew me a kiss. I closed my eyes.

"That seemed better?" came Zeke's voice and I opened my eyes again.

* * *

WRITER'S NOTE:

Hey everyone. Hope you are enjoying the story so far! I am currently seeking feedback on what you think so far, what you think of it all and where you think it is going… so feel free to leave a review or drop me a message. Interested to pick your brains about it!

Look forward to hearing from you!


	12. Chapter 12

Chapter 12

ZEKE

I watched Four's face carefully. I had actually been startled and then scared when he screamed after going in the first time. He had been difficult to bring out and when I did finally get him out, he was so shut down. He was so scared and upset that he had only babbled and cried for the first few minutes. It took a long time for him to calm down enough to explain what had even happened. I was also worried about what it meant about in the long run, if the landscape was changing. How was that even possible?

"Yes it was better. Apparently someone high up and external is changing the landscape in ways we can't anticipate or control. You coming?" he asked and before I could answer, he injected us both and in we went.

I couldn't see anything. Were my eyes open? I blinked a few times and it remained all black. But yes, it seemed they were open. Never been in a landscape like this before. It didn't seem like a fear landscape at all. "What's going on Four?" I asked and my voice echoed. I hoped I was still with him and that we hadn't been separated in whatever this was.

"Give me a second," he replied and his voice seemed to be coming from a few metres away from me. Then suddenly the light came on and I shielded my eyes to let them adjust.

"You could have warned me," I said and walked over to him.

"Where's the fun in that?" he asked and I rolled my eyes. "Come on," he said and we walked through the door next to him. Tris and Uri were there waiting for us as we walked through. Four instantly crushed her to him again, practically squeezing the life out of her. But she didn't seem to mind. I think after he saw her die in that landscape, he was a little overprotective. It had probably brought back some pretty strong emotions from when she had actually died. Not that he had seen it happen. But still.

"Hey bro," Uri said and hugged me. "Good to see you made it through the dark room," he added. Apt name.

"What's the go with that? What do you know about the changing landscape?" I asked Uri and saw Tris and Four disappear into another room.

"I don't know too much. They keep us in the dark a lot as well," he said and we both grinned at each other.

"Very punny," I said and we both laughed.

"I only know that someone who controls more than we imagined is changing it. Making it harder for us all to talk. They are trying to prevent us from fixing it," Uri answered vaguely.

"Fixing what?" I asked. Sometimes I hated talking to these guys, all they gave me were riddles!

"I don't know how to answer that question Zeke," Uri said and I could tell from the less than happy look on his face, that he was telling the truth. He genuinely didn't. "We are limited in what we can actually say. It's like we're programmed," he said and something in that statement jerked a reaction. Were they just programs? Was this actually real? Were they really alive or were we just being made to see and interact with something that wasn't real but was forcing us to react on the surface on the information we were given here? If that's what it was, I didn't want to let on that that's what I was thinking. So I changed the subject.

"So how are you really? When are you guys coming back?" I asked him.

"I'm doing ok. I miss you and mum. And all our friends. It will be good to be with you all again. And as for the when… I don't know," he said and I nodded, rolling my eyes. Of course. "Soon I hope," he added and hugged me. "I love you bro."

"I love you too."

"I know," he said and grinned at me cheekily. It was good to see him in such high spirits. Given everything that had happened three years ago, it had been a while since I had seen him so cheerful. And I was glad to see him and Mar still together.

"How's Mar going?" I asked and he actually blushed and looked down. My brother, blushing?! "That good huh?" I asked and elbowed him.

"Yeah," he said bashfully. Wow. I couldn't believe it.

"Good on you bro," I said, slapping him on the shoulder and grinning. He looked up at me and narrowed his eyes then grinned mischievously.

"How's Shauna?" he asked and I cursed under my breath. "Ahhh, so you are finally starting to admit it ay?"

"We're just friends Uri," I said and he smiled at me shaking his head.

"Just admit it to yourself. We can all see it and I know you know it," Uri said. "You love Shauna. You have since we were kids. I may have been naïve then, but I have matured since then," he said and poked me. Then he suddenly looked up at me. "You need to go. Now!" he said and I opened my eyes.

"Well that escalated quickly," Four said, sitting next to me.

"You get told to leave immediately as well?" I asked him.

"Yep. Damn sick of that, I tell you," he said and started to stand.

"So am I. Can't wait to have them back," I said and he just nodded, deep in thought. "You get anything more out of them?" I asked and he shook his head.

"Frustrating. So, so frustrating!" he said, still shaking his head.

"Certainly is. I should probably go. I am hanging out with Shauna tomorrow. If I'm tired or late, I will never live it down," I said.

"Ok. Oh before you go, how did it go with George and Aram?" he asked me.

"Oh yeah! They agreed we should tail him once we catch a glimpse of him again. They are going to take care of that and let me know what they find," I told him.

"Sure," he said and nodded.

"Ok I'll be in touch," I said and left. I made my way back to my apartment, undressed for bed and was asleep as soon as my head hit the pillow.

I'd only just closed my eyes when I heard knocking. "Zeke," I heard followed by more knocking and I started to open my eyes. Who was coming over at this time of night? What time was it? I looked at my watch. It was after nine in the morning. Shit! I jumped out of bed, not even bothering to put a shirt on and raced to the door.

"Shauna, hey," I said and she raised an eyebrow at me as she looked me over, inch by inch. Wow. Her stare was making me hot. She's just a friend Zeke. Just a friend.

"Didn't think to get dressed for the occasion?" she asked and I looked down. I was shirtless and wearing boxers but nothing else. Oops. "Not that I'm complaining, but I didn't think clothes were optional?" she asked, laughing at me as she came in. A slight hint of pain or jealously flicked across her face as she said, "Late night?"

Shauna, jealous? No. I was imagining it. "Yes it was a late night," I answered and this time she did actually look hurt so I felt the need to explain. "I was working with Tobias on something," I added and her look softened slightly. "Let me just have a quick shower and change then I'm all yours. Make yourself comfortable," I said, gesturing the loungeroom and she nodded so I made a hasty retreat into my bathroom.

A quick shower later I wrapped a towel swathed around my hips and re-entered the loungeroom to go to the bedroom. "Still clothing optional huh?" she asked as she looked up from a book she was reading. She looked me up and down again.

Focus Zeke. Get dressed.

"Two more minutes. Promise," I said and went quickly into the bedroom. Was it just me or did she say 'Shame'? I quickly got dressed, putting on a pair of jeans and a black shirt and walked back out to her. "Much better," I said, announcing myself as I entered.

"Something like that," she said and grinned. "So what are we doing today?" she asked me.

"It's a surprise. But begins with an array of boardgames," I said, sitting down on the lounge next to her. She leapt at me playfully.

"You know I don't like surprises… what is it?" she asked, laying across me with her face inches from mine.

"I can't tell you," I said, struggling to think. I shifted so she was laying comfortably between my legs. My mouth went dry. I reached up slowly and brushed a lock of her behind her ear, my hand resting at the nape of her neck. Something changed between us.

"Why not?" she asked. Why not what? What were we talking about?

"Huh?" I asked.

"Why not?" she asked again.

"Why not indeed," I said and pulled her lips to mine. I brushed her lips softly with mine and she shivered above me. I pulled back an inch, smiling. Wow. I looked at her and saw she looked startled. I hesitated for a second, my smile fading. Should I pretend it didn't happen? Should I apologise? Should I kiss her again?

I saw the hint of a smile curve her lips then her lips parted slightly like she was about to say something. But I didn't let her. I figured if she was going to say no, she should know what she was saying no to. So I kissed her again but this time really kissed her like I meant it. I knew she felt the same about me when she kissed me back, hard. Her arms wrapped around my neck, pulling us chest to chest. I wrapped my other arm across her lower back, crushing her to me and running my hand under her shirt and up her warm back.

I lost all sense. All I could taste was Shauna. All I could feel was Shauna. All I wanted to feel, was Shauna. Suddenly she pulled back, looking at me. I could see the uncertainty on her face.

"What's wrong?" I asked her.

"What about Vanessa?" she asked.

"What about her? We broke up," I answered.

"What is this then? The rebound?" Shauna asked, sounding angry. Would she have preferred I was still going out with Ness? Shauna started pushing up off me, getting up and I pulled her back.

"Shauna, come here," I said and pulled her down and cradled her to my chest. She didn't fight me as my arms came around her, but she didn't put her arms back around me. "Do you want to know why we broke up?" I asked her and felt her nod against me. I couldn't believe what I was about to tell her. "We broke up because Ness thinks I love you." I heard Shauna gasp and she wriggled out of my grasp and looked at me.

"Is that true?" she asked.

"That's why we broke up yes," I said, purposefully misconstruing her question.

"That's not what I meant and you know it," she said, frustrated and I grinned. I wanted her to ask me straight out if I was going to bare myself for her emotionally. I think she knew that she was going to have to bare herself as well. "Do you love me?" she asked, looking very nervous.

"I think I have always loved you Shauna," I replied. And she looked stunned. "From the time we were little Dauntless born kids running around and you used to try and beat me up. You were always one of us. And you were always there, always making an impression without trying. Then you turned into a woman and you stopped always being there. I know we went through training together and started to stop being as close. But like I said, I miss you."

"Oh shut up," she said and kissed me again and the heat built up between us. She ran her hands under my shirt and up my chest before pulling my shirt off so she could snuggle against my bare chest. Being ex-Dauntless, we weren't like the Abnegation. We didn't have any concerns about sleeping together. It wasn't something you waited for until you were married or felt like you had to hide your affection for someone. But something about Shauna brought out the gentleman in me and I forced myself not to pick her up and carry her to my bed.

I lost myself again in her kiss until my stomach grumbled. I hadn't had breakfast. Shauna pulled back and laughed at me. Then her stomach grumbled and we both laughed.

"Are you hungry?" I asked her and she smiled shyly and nodded. I sat up, bringing her with me and she leaned back to extricate herself from my lap. I looked at my watch and was surprised to see it was lunchtime. Hours? We had been kissing for hours? "Were we really kissing for that long?" I asked her and she blushed and giggled.

"Apparently," she answered. I could easily lose days kissing Shauna. Why the hell had I waited so long to man up?

"Come on," I said and we went into the kitchen. I started getting food together, ready for our picnic at the park. I figured we should still do it. Although we hadn't started the day how I thought we would have.

"Picnic lunch?" she asked.

"Yeah I had planned on an array of board and card games. Followed by a walk down to the park and picnic lunch," I answered and she smiled.

"And then?" she asked and I laughed and shook my head.

"And then I'm not telling you. It's still a surprise," I replied and she hit me in the arm. I laughed again. "Come here you," I said and pulled her into my arms again and we kissed again until my stomach grumbled again.

"Well come on then," she said, "I'm hungry!" I finished packing the lunch and we walked down to the park, holding hands. Then sat together, laughing and eating, people watching. It wasn't until the sun was starting to go down that I even realised how much time had passed. We packed up and walked back to my place slowly.

"This was fun," she said as we dumped the picnic stuff back in the kitchen. I'd clean it later. "I should probably go," she said and I shook my head, pulling her into my arms again.

"**This** includes dinner," I said and she laughed.

"You pack a mean lunch, but who is going to cook?" she asked me.

"I can cook," I answered, slightly insulted.

"But I can cook better. Come over?" she asked and I smiled. I had always enjoyed watching her in the kitchen.

"Why Shauna," I said grinning, "Are you inviting me over for dinner?"

"It would seem that way Zeke, come on," she said and tugged me to the door. I locked up and we went down the hall to her apartment. I sat at the kitchen bench and watched as she moved around the kitchen, collecting ingredients and setting them on the counter.

"Would you like some help?" I asked her and she smiled and shook her head.

"I'm fine," she replied. "You don't have to help."

"I'd like to."

"Ok, dice this up for me," she said, handing me a capsicum.

"I was expecting a more challenging assignment," I said and she laughed at me and handed me an onion. I diced them up and passes it all back to her.

"Thank you, now go and sit," she said, indicating the bench with a very large, very sharp knife. I put my hands up in mock surrender.

"Anything you say Boss," I said and she laughed. I loved that sound.

And so for the next three days, I almost completely forgot about the outside world. Shauna and I ventured between the two apartments, spending all our time together. We still hadn't slept together but enjoyed the blissful environment we had created. We snuggled together to sleep and I had never been so happy.

Was this what I had been missing out on for so long?

Eventually, the real world came knocking. I couldn't escape it forever.


	13. Chapter 13

Chapter 13

TOBIAS

I wonder why I haven't heard from Zeke in a week. Oh well, I'm sure he will let me know if something comes up. But I am surprised that he hasn't come back over to go back into the landscape. I admit that I was a little worried about it. I wasn't sure I could face another experience like where Tris died in front of me. But he hadn't had that experience. He had started from the dark room. Unless he went in without me?

But then, I hadn't been able to get through to Tris in as many days. I hadn't been able to concentrate enough to see her that way and I hadn't dreamt about her. I didn't want to push my luck in case we weren't able to get in to her at all. I wasn't sure if I could deal with that yet. Not until she was back. Something was better than nothing. But we were best to leave some time so that whoever the hierarchy were that were trying to stop us, would back off slightly.

Regardless though, I had been run off my feet by Johanna, racing here there and everywhere all over the city and the Fringe. Amar was right that the Fringe seemed to have settled down though. Johanna had me playing damage control to keep everyone calm and create an illusion to show that we weren't worried, that we were still unified with our purpose of creating a better city in Chicago and bridging the gap with the Fringe.

I still refused to step foot into the Bureau. I just couldn't do it. Not with what happened.

I hadn't seen Rafi's guard again, whom we were referring to as 'The Man' for simplicity's sake. Speaking of which, I should check in with George and Amar and see if they have any news. I wondered if they had been able to sight him and track him at all. I had a couple of hours before I needed to debrief Johanna again so I decided to head down to the compound.

"Hey George," I said and shook his hand.

"How are you Four?" he asked me and I nodded.

"Pretty good thanks. Zeke been MIA from here as well?" I asked.

"Sure has. I think he is holed up with a new woman. I told him to come in today. Hopefully he won't be too far away. We need to talk about this guy we've been following," George said and I raised an eyebrow.

"News then?"

"Yes. And we don't like it. Doubt you will either," he said.

"Where's Amar?"

"Finishing off the notes for the briefing. This thing could be bigger than we thought. We'd like you there, we know you know."

"Definitely. Glad I dropped in then. I did want to check how that was going," I said, explaining my appearance. I hadn't been around much lately with all the work I was doing for Johanna.

"Good. Meeting room five in ten minutes?" he asked and I nodded. He left to do whatever he needed to before the meeting. If they were actually calling a meeting, then this was bad. I rang Zeke.

"Hey Four," he said as he answered.

"Hey Zeke. Where are you?" I asked. "Hope you aren't far away," I added.

"Nope, give me two minutes."

"Pit?" I asked.

"Sure." We hung up and true to his word, Zeke was there two minutes later and looking more relaxed and happy than I had ever seen him. I bet I knew the reason. After George's comment about a new woman, I knew.

"Shauna?" I asked and I could see him try, but he was unable to keep a smile from his face. And it was a huge smile. It lit up his whole face and I would be surprised if his cheeks didn't hurt afterwards. He looked as though he felt the way I did when Tris and I were together.

"Yeah," he mumbled.

"Good on you Zeke. It's about bloody time!" I said and hugged him.

"Yeah, yeah," he mumbled, sounding grumpy but grinning from ear to ear. I was seriously so happy for him. I was glad he had found with Shauna what I had had with Tris.

"So do you know anything of what they found?" I asked Zeke, getting back to the task at hand.

"No, I have been pretty secluded," he answered with a grin.

"Shall we then?" I asked and he nodded and we walked up towards the meeting room. "So how did it all come about?" I asked, referring to him and Shauna.

"It just did. She was trying to make me tell her what I had planned for us to do. She hates surprises. Then I kissed her," he said and his voice took on a wistful tone as we reached the meeting room.

"Fair enough," I replied and we entered the room. There George and Amar were waiting with a handful of other police officers that were quite high up in our new scheme.

"Thanks for coming. Let's get started," said Amar as he took the floor after we were seated. If he was being semi-formal, then whatever this was, was serious.

"So as you know, Vladimir Bostok AKA the guard of Rafi, has been attempting to investigate a range of aspects about the city," Amar began and Vladimir's face flashed up on the screen. "He began with his attempts to learn more about the serums used by the city. This resulted in the disappearance of researcher and developer, Cara," Amar said and Cara's face came up on the screen. It seemed to be an old Erudite picture. "Subsequently also resulted in the disappearance of researcher and psychoanalyst, Matthew," Amar continued then paused and looked at George as Matthew's face came up on the screen.

Wait! Matthew was missing?! Shit.

"He has also made attempts at discovering the training methods and formations of the police force and intelligence cell here at the compound. There is talk that the reason behind this is that we are creating soldiers by wiping their personalities and implanting them with what we want, including created memories and emotions," George said, continuing on from Amar.

"The Revolutionists are referring to it as Project Tabula Rasa," Amar then continued, "The blank slate," he explained. "We have reason to believe that Vladimir is working with or for the Revolutionists. We have had Vladimir under surveillance now for the better part of a week. During such time, we have seen him meet with one person and a daily basis at minimum," he said and I was utterly shocked when pictures of Vladimir and Christina came up on the screen.

Christina was working with them? With him? I couldn't believe it. After what Tris went through to mend the rift and this was what Christina did. I slammed my fist on the table angrily.

"We are unsure to what extent she is working with him or what information she is feeding them," George said. I think he was trying to calm me. But I was seeing red. I couldn't believe it. It was like a big "fuck you" to Tris. That Tris' death had meant nothing. Been for nothing. I just count NOT believe it. I was even too angry to think that there must be some kind of logical explanation for this.

"Four, calm down," Zeke said, putting a hand on my arm.

"These people ruined my life and now Christina is on their side? After everything that we all went through?!" I stated angrily, standing. Come on Tobias, think about how to handle this. I needed to go to Matthew's lab (I had no idea where he lived) and see if there was anything from FourTris. They had been surprisingly quiet. With any luck, they had seen this coming and pre-emptively taken Matthew as well.

"Tobias," Amar said softly and I stilled. Amar rarely used that tone with me but it had always made me stop where I was. "Calm yourself," he said and I forced myself to take a deep breath. "I knew this would be hard for you, but George is right. We don't know what's going on with Christina and why she is working with Vladimir. We are going to continue surveillance and see what we come up with," he explained and I forced myself to take another breath.

"Fine," I said. "Anything else to add?"

"We have heard whispers of a group that has been working against the Revolutionists. We don't know the name of the group or what actions they have taken. But there is talk. We are trying to find out more about them but so far we are coming up blank." He must be talking about FourTris. They had taken Cara and were presumably working against the Revolutionists. But who were they? Why hadn't they contacted us? My mind raced as I considered the possibilities.

"Under no circumstances can Christina find out about the surveillance," George said. "You can NOT confront her Four. Understood?"

"Yes," I answered.

"I'd like to run down some leads with Four," Zeke said suddenly and I looked at him.

"Sure," George said. "Let us know what you find."

"Will do. Come on Four, let's go," Zeke said and ushered me out the door. "You calm enough to process now?" he asked me and I bristled.

"Yes," I answered petulantly. Zeke ignored my tone.

"Good. Let's go to Matthew's lab. Perhaps our beloved FourTris has been in play," he Zeke, obviously drawing the same conclusions and hopes as I had.

"Fine." Great, I was turning monosyllabic. Stop being a dick Tobias.

We made our way down there in silence, both obviously lost in our own thoughts. I forced myself not to think malicious thoughts. I supposed it was true that when it came to the ones we loved, we lost all sense of reason or logic. Surely there was a logical explanation for why Christina would be working with them. But then that didn't seem very believable lately given her attitude and thoughts on the progression of the city.

We went up to his lab, which was roped off with police tape and we ducked under it, entering his office. If FourTris had left a note for me, it would be in an unobvious spot that I would probably come across by accident. I looked around.

His office was as Matthew had left it, a mess. Matthew had a 'unique' organisation system and where we looked and found complete disarray, he looked and found organised chaos. But I had already known this about him so didn't think twice. But one thing that stood out, was his bookshelf. It was tidy. The books were a little too aligned for Matthew's eclectic office.

I walked over and examined it and Zeke came up next to me.

"You think there is something here?" he asked me and I nodded. "Not in the mess?" he asked and I shook my head.

"That wasn't caused by someone else. That was Matthew's style," I explained and Zeke chuckled. I looked at the books. There were multiple books on the human brain and anatomy, as well as books on electrical impulses, physics, philosophy and a range of sciences. The one book that stood out to me, was a book on the history of the Factions.

I wondered why Matthew would have a book on the history of the Factions. I pulled it off the shelf and opened the cover. It was from the old high school library. I flicked it to the back where it had the sign in/out docket and there was a docket there. I pulled it out and looked at it. The last person it had been "loaned" to was Beatrice Prior but was date stamped as a month after her choosing day. While she was in Dauntless training.

So, it was FourTris. So little information, but it had to be them. Didn't it? I flicked through the book in case there was something tucked inside it.

Nothing.

There had to be something! Think Tobias.

"Check all these books and see which are from Faction High. Open all of them to the back. There has to be a message here," I said to Zeke and he nodded and we began pulling the books off the shelf and openining them.

"Here's one," he said and placed it on the arm chair.

"I think there's a few here," I said and we kept searching. We came up with ten books altogether. Four of them were signed out to me as Tobias Eaton (though I had never borrowed them) and six were signed out to Tris.

Four and six.

FourTris.

Only Tris knew about me nicknaming her six. It was an in joke. A groan escaped me.

"You ok?" Zeke asked me and I nodded. "What is it?"

"It's definitely FourTris," I said and scanned them again. The books were randomly selected. Two on anatomy, one on physics, two on psychology, three on the human brain and one on philosophy. Nothing stood out about the book choices. I looked at the dockets again. Written at the bottom of four of them so lightly, I almost didn't see it, was one word each.

Come. Patience. Protectors. Are.

"Patience. Protectors are coming," I said aloud.

"Huh?" Zeke asked and I pointed out the words.

"I hope they are coming. And I hope they can help us," I replied and Zeke and I shared a look. Only one week to go before they should arrive. Hopefully.

"Let's put them back," Zeke said and I nodded and we placed them back pretty much how we had found them. No one would pick up on the clue. Surely.

"Now to pretend like none of it has happened," I said, "Like I haven't learnt something about one friend betraying me and two disappearing."

"Yes Four, you will have to have a much better poker face than that," Zeke said and I chided myself. Ok Tobias. If Tris could do it, you can too. Come on.

"Easy for you," I joked and forced myself to laugh. "You have Shauna now," I explained and he blushed which actually made me laugh and after a second, it felt natural.

"Let's get going. One week to go," Zeke said and I sighed.


	14. Chapter 14

Chapter 14

TOBIAS

"Hey George, I heard the Protectors get in today," I said as we shook hands.

"Yeah they should be here in a few minutes. Would you like to join us? They, actually that's them now I thhh-" George trailed off as through the door walked the Protectors. Tris, Will, Tori, Uriah and Marlene. We both held our breath and watched as the Protectors asked someone who walked by them something and we saw them turn and point in our direction before the Protectors walked over to join us.

I couldn't believe it was actually her. I couldn't believe that any second now I was about to feel her. "Tris," I said and ran to her, wrapping my arms around her tightly and picking her up to swing her around. Out of the corner of my eye I saw George hug Tori as well. So you can imagine my surprise when Tris jabbed me in the kidney and wriggled out of my grasp before punching me squarely in the jaw. If it was Tris, her punching had certainly improved. Now she used her whole body instead of just her arm. I held my jaw.

"Who the hell do you think you are?" she asked me, magnificently indignant. Just like the day I asked her if she had been pushed to be the first jumper.

"Tris, don't you remember me?" I asked, absolutely awed but utterly devastated.

"My name is Candice, not Tris. And I don't like to be man handled by people I have never met," she replied and I looked at her searchingly. I went to reach for her again and she stepped back, out of my reach. I was floored.

"I… but you… back… " I mumbled and my legs crumbled beneath me and I dropped to my knees.

"Look I'm sorry, but I don't know who you think I am. We have just arrived from Fort Bragg. Perhaps we should start over? I am Candice Prior of the Protectors," Tris/Candice said and she approached me and put her hand on my shoulder, her demeanour softening. I didn't really know what to do. "Come on, you must be Tobias. Up you get," she said and took my hand, pulling me to my feet. Her hand was so small in mine, just as Tris' had been.

Her hair was the same colour of spun gold, loosely braided and over her shoulder as it was much longer than when I had seen her last. Her eyes were the same colour of a cloudless sky on a summer's day. I could see the edge of a tattoo over her collarbone. I had to stop myself from pushing the edge of her shirt to see if it was the same. If she wasn't Tris, she certainly wouldn't appreciate me trying to move her clothes to see more of her body.

"So are you Tobias?" she asked again, her voice the same low voice for a girl. I'd still know that voice anywhere.

"Yes, I am Tobias Johnson," I replied (having dropped Marcus' name finally and taken Evelyn's about six months ago) and she nodded. "Prior you said?" I asked. Had she said Prior or did I imagine that?

"Yes, Candice Prior," she said and stuck her hand out to shake mine. Her handshake was a lot firmer than Tris' had been. "This is Bill, Tyrah, Zachuriah and Marly," she added, pointing out Will, Tori, Uriah and Marlene. They each came and shook hands, all looking identical to the initial people we knew them as.

"Do none of you remember me?" I asked and they shook their heads. And it was then I noticed that George had had a similar reaction from Tori/Tyrah as I had. We were both shocked. "This is George," I said and he continued to just stare. "I'm sorry, but you all look an awful lot like people we used to know," I added, trying to explain. I could only imagine what it was like for them as well.

"It's ok, Mar thought people were staring at her because she's soooo good looking," Zachuriah joked and Mar/Marly elbowed him glaring. It was uncanny how similar their personalities were as well. It had to be them. Perhaps just reprogrammed like the Bureau? How to break through that? And Tris was never susceptible to it. It didn't make sense. None of it did. "Love, you are good looking," he added and she smiled then they kissed. I rolled my eyes. Same old Uriah even if he had a different name now.

"I was under the impression there was a contingent of ten of you coming?" I asked.

"Just the five of us here," Tris/Candice answered somewhat cryptically. She didn't really answer my question and I wondered if she was omitting something. She didn't say that there weren't ten coming or that there were ten of them at all. Only that there were five here.

"George, do you want to show them where they are staying for tonight so they can get settled in?" I asked and he continued to stare. I elbowed him. "George!" he shook his head as if to clear it.

"Hi, I'm George. I'm the head trainer here. Umm we have put you guys in one of the spare dorm rooms for now, I hope that's ok?" George said, finally sounding somewhat coherent.

"Sounds fine to us, we don't need much," Tori/Tyrah said and the others made sounds of agreement.

"Great I will let George take you up there, I need to make a call. Excuse me," I said and left. It was so hard being near her and it not actually being her. Well not that she remembered anyway. I saw George lead them up to the old transfer rooms.

"Zeke," I said into the phone as he answered. "You better prepare yourself."

"For what? Are the Protectors there?" he asked.

"They are. But they are our missing ones but not our missing ones. They have different names but they all look the same and act the same. They don't remember us Zeke," I said in dismay.

"Are you sure it's them?" he asked and I thought hard about it. Was there a chance it wasn't them?

"Come see for yourself, then you tell me. I'll meet you at the Pit."

"Sure. I will be right there," he said and hung up. I was pretty sure he was in the building somewhere. I was right because he caught up with me within a couple of minutes.

"You ready for this?" I asked him and he nodded so we walked through the tunnels to the dorm rooms they were bunking in. They were all joking as they unpacked their kit and Zeke and I stood there in the doorway watching them for a moment, analysing their behaviour unobtrusively.

"Oooh muffins," Marly said as she finally spotted the muffin tray at the edge of the room and she bounded over to them, half skipping, half galloping.

"Quit eating them all and pass one here?" Zachuriah said, grinning at her mischievously.

"Mmkay," she mumbled with a mouthful of muffin. She swallowed before saying, "You better come get one. We all know you can't catch," she said and grinned back at him, batting her eyelashes flirtatiously.

"But **I** can," Will said and Marly grinned at him before tossing him one. He deftly caught it and took a big bite.

"So can Candice. You want one?" Marly asked her and I see Candice look up at her and nod. Marly threw her one and as Candice went to catch it, Zachuriah jumped in front of her and caught it like he used to in sport at school.

"Hey!" Candice said indignantly. "That was mine." She elbowed him and he pretended to be wounded for half a second before running out of her way. She rolled her eyes and started walking towards the tray of muffins. "Tyrah, would you like one?" Candice asked her, her Abnegation showing.

"No thanks. I'm holding out for this cake I have heard so much about," Tyrah replied and went back to unpacking. I noticed a few grey strands streaking her hair.

I was watching their candid banter with amusement, enjoying seeing them all so happy and healthy again, even if they didn't remember us.

Yet.

I looked at Zeke, he wore a look of hurt on his face. I imagined it was because his brother didn't remember him. He turned to me.

"It's them," we said in unison.

"How are we going to handle this with everyone that knows them?" Zeke asked me and before I could answer they seemed to finally notice that we were standing there watching them. "Ummm, I'm Zeke," he said as he walked into the room and shook hands with them all, handling it a little better than I had initially. He faltered slightly when he got to his brother and almost went in for the hug but held back at the last second.

"So would you guys like a tour?" I asked.

"That would be great," Candice said and walked over to join me.

"I'm going to stay and unpack," Marly said and the others all agreed with Marly.

"I'll stay until they are done and then take them," Zeke said and I nodded. I was really nervous now, knowing I was going to be alone with her, but that it wasn't her.

"Great, follow me," I said and started leading the way.

"So are you a trainer here?" Candice asked me and I turned back to look at her as she caught up to walk beside me.

"I was a number of years ago," I replied and cleared my throat. "I'm a political assistant at the moment but contemplating returning to training and intelligence," I replied truthfully. I thought about when she had first been a transfer. I had been ready to give it all up and become Factionless. They were going to be my last intake of initiates and then I was out. Done. And then she came along and I couldn't leave. I had to protect her. I had to get to know her. I had to be with her.

"And do you enjoy fighting with your words instead of your fists?" she asked me, staring at me as we walked.

I took a deep breath before I answered, "For the most part. I do miss the smell of the training room and the undeniable pride I felt when an initiate made it through, achieving their goals and moving forwards in their training," I replied. "So this is the Pit," I said, revealing it as we walked through the door onto the walkway above it.

"Apt," she replied then leant over the railing above the chasm. The railing shuddered a little as she leaned quite far over.

"Careful," I said, instinctively reaching for her, my arms slipping around her waist protectively. She turned and narrowed her eyes at me and I released her as soon as she was steady and upright. "This chasm shows us the fine line between bravery and idiocy. A number have died here and probably will continue to do so. Just be careful," I said and looked away.

"I can see this is hard for you. Would you prefer someone else show me around?" she asked, placing a hand on my arm. I looked down at her hand then back at her and she moved her arm away.

"No, it's fine," I replied and we kept moving through the tunnels. I took her into the room with the targets for knife throwing. There were a few sets of knives on the table. "Done knife throwing before?" I asked her as she seemed intrigued at the room.

"No," she replied. "It was removed from the training at Fort Bragg. It was thought to be of no use other than fuelling the bravado of the men, in particular." I felt a smile lift at the corner of my mouth.

"Would you like to have a go?" I asked her and she grinned in delight.

"Sure, can you show me?" she asked excitedly. I nodded and picked up a set of knives, holding two in my left, one in my right. I positioned myself and focused on my breathing, throwing the knife as I released my breath and hitting the target in the dead centre. I continued with the next two knives, burying them in the targets within millimetres of each other.

"Your turn," I replied and she took a shaky breath, picking up the knives. She took a couple of practise goes, focusing on her stance to copy me. Just as Tris had. Then she aimed and missed the target completely.

"Am I doing this right?" she asked and I approached her.

"Keep your eye on your target, release the knife as you release your breath. But hold your breath from here," I said, placing my hand on her diaphragm. I felt her suck in her breath and I let go and stood back. She took a second to get her breathing under control and I chastised myself. I had to stop touching her. It was obviously making her uncomfortable.

She had another attempt and this time hit the target, close to the centre. "Well done," I said. "Now try to hit it again." She let loose her third knife and it hit the centre. She let out a whoop of delight. "Great. We can come back here tomorrow if you want to have another go. In the meantime we can move on if you like?" I looked at her, her eyes were bright.

"That sounds great," she said. "Hungry?" I asked her. I knew it was dinner time and she had wolfed down that muffin, I wondered if she was hungry.

"Starved," she said and we walked into the dining hall. Zeke and the others were there and waved us over. We went and sat down. Zeke sat next to Zachuriah and they seemed to have formed an easy bond as brothers would. I sat down on the other side of Zeke and expected Candice to sit with Marly on the other end of the table, but she sat down next to me.

I forced myself to concentrate. She stared at the hamburgers on the table. I actually laughed aloud at the look on her face. It was the same as Tris' had been. Coming from Abnegation, Tris had never seen a hamburger. I pushed the bowl of sauce towards her. "Put this on it," I said and she smiled at me before taking a deep breath as though preparing herself, and then taking a big bite.

"Mmmm, this is good," she said, her words garbled by food.

"Four," said Amar as he walked over. "I want to show you something, can you head back over here tomorrow?"

"Sure thing. Morning?" I asked and he nodded.

"Four?" Candice asked.

"Nickname," I muttered.

"Four, like the number?" she asked and I nodded. "Do you prefer Tobias?"

"Doesn't really bother me any more. But yeah, call me Tobias," I said. I probably should have told her to call me Four, it would remind me that she and I now had boundaries again whereas Tris and I had lost them. This was symbolised by her calling me by my name.

We continued eating, pretending it wasn't awkward. I had to force myself to not look at her. Because every time I looked at her, I stared at her mouth wanting to kiss it. Or her hair wanting to brush it away from her neck. Or her collarbone, trying to get a glimpse of her tattoos to see what they were.

"So how long have you guys been in the Protectors?" Zeke asked, making conversation.

"As long as we can remember," Zachuriah answered. That fit with us thinking it was them. As long as they remembered was probably the three years they had been gone. But they didn't remember anything before that. Yet. I wondered if I could get Candice and the others over to see Matthew. Or Matthew to see them. Perhaps that could reveal their memories. Damn him for being missing. Damn FourTris. Why wasn't **any** of this easy?!

Focus Tobias, I warned myself, feeling the warmth of Candice's leg next to mine and her hair brush my arm as she leant over me to get some salt. I forced myself to be nonchalant and not react. But it was almost the hardest thing I had ever done.

It was at this point that I contemplated the memory serum again. Couldn't I just make myself forget like she evidently had? I concentrated on the discussions going on around me and found myself actually enjoying it after a while. As I always had, I got on well with Marly, Zachuriah and Tyrah. And definitely got on well with Candice and I tried to focus on the fact she was a different person and not pretend like I could make her remember.

And I had never had a lot to do with Will/Bill but I found him to be the same kid he was as an initiate, keen, brave and protective of the others. Plus he was surprisingly funny although could be quite crude which didn't relate well with the Abnegation in me. I was surprised that he was always like this and surprised that Tris had always been quite comfortable around him. I thought he may have put her out of her comfort zone with some of the crude comments he made.

After dinner, we walked them back to their room and played card games. I stayed for a couple of games and then left, because every time I looked at Tris/Candice, I just wanted to get her alone and kiss or, or talk to her… or just be in her company with her undivided attention on me. But this wasn't going to work. Not until I got some emotional distance. I did it with Evelyn, I could do it with Tris/Candice too.


	15. Chapter 15

Chapter 15

TOBIAS

I lay there, thinking. I couldn't sleep. I couldn't concentrate on anything or relax knowing that she was tantalisingly in reach, but achingly out. Every time I closed my eyes, I alternated between picturing Tris' face and the feeling of her arms around me and her lips on mine and then picturing her as Candice, slugging me in the jaw for hugging her.

My emotions were in overdrive.

I decided to go into the landscape to find Tris. Find out if this was her. I had taken one vial of the serum from Zeke and so prepared it now. I was scared about going into the landscape in case it was her, and in case it wasn't. How could I handle being around "Candice" either way? If it was her I would want to make her remember me, remember us. And if it wasn't, I was likely to fall in love with her all over again.

I injected it and closed my eyes. When I opened them I was surprised I wasn't in the dark room. It was more like the old landscape. I was atop the Hancock building. Back to my fear of heights. Odd. But still came the pounding heart, the erratic breathing that I struggled to get under control. I walked carefully along the narrow path that lead into the building, trying to keep it together. I was a lot better at moving through this fear than I used to be.

I mean by now, I had ziplined, climbed a Ferris Wheel and climbed the metal structure in the park. But thinking about it, it was all with or for Tris. As I thought about her now, I felt my fear dissolving. I made it inside the building and took deep breaths. I thought this would turn into the fear or claustrophobia, and I was correct to a degree.

The floor around me started disappearing, forcing me forward. I had to run full pelt to not disappear into the abyss. This was new. I could see a small gap ahead of me and I lunged to reach it. It was like an air conditioning shaft. I pulled myself through the vent and crawled along as the space got smaller and smaller. And enter the claustrophobia. I forced myself to continue on even though it was tight against me now.

Then suddenly I fell into water and the coldness startled me. I swam to the edge of the pool and pulled myself out. I wondered where this was going. And I wondered where Tris was. Normally I would be close to seeing her by now but something about this felt different. I walked, dripping, along the side of the pool and through a door. Then I was in our old Abnegation house. Marcus was there and he rounded on Evelyn, screaming at her.

"Look at how dirty this floor is," he screamed. I looked at where he indicated. He had just tracked mud into the house as he entered.

"I'm sorry," she mumbled.

"I'll make you sorry," he yelled and pulled off his belt. I couldn't stand the thought of him hitting her, so despite him also being my fear, I jumped in front of her and waited for the sting of the belt as it hit. I closed my eyes. It never came.

When I opened them again, I was standing with the canister of Tris' ashes in my hands. Eric was standing next to me. Gone was the greasy hair and about half his piercings. His head was now shaved all over but shorter on the sides. Interesting.

"It's meant to be," he said kindly. "You'll see."

"How is Tris being dead meant to be?" I asked him, tears streaming down my face.

"You know why," Eric said, prompting me. Everything in me told me not to tell Eric the truth. That somehow if he was a part of this, even though he seemed just like the landscape, I shouldn't tell him what I knew. "Why is it meant to be Tobias?" he asked and I was surprised at his use of my name.

"I don't know," I replied.

"Yes you do," he said and put his hand on my shoulder. "Why is it meant to be?" he asked again.

"Because she's back," I whispered, closing my eyes.

"Yes, she is," he replied and I opened my eyes. I was sitting on my bed, the landscape gone. No Tris. Could I not see her because she was back? Did I no longer have means to contact her? I doubted with the emotional turmoil I was feeling at the moment that I would be able to relax enough to contact her that way. And what was Eric doing there? How was he involved? Was he actually trying to help me? I was somewhat repulsed at the thought.

I was so frustrated at the moment that I decided to go down to the compound early and get in some time with a punching bag. I needed some kind of release otherwise I was going to go crazy. And between the smell of the training room, and the release of tension while I was training, I should be put into a slightly better frame of mind. Plus I had to meet with Amar anyway.

So I made my way slowly to the compound and went down to the training rooms. They were always deserted at this time of morning. I put my backpack at the side of the room and did some line touches to warm up before starting on the punching bags.

I had no idea how long had passed as I let out my emotions, punch after punch and kick after kick. I kept going until my body was aching and I struggled to move. I leaned against the punching bag, trying to catch my breath and slow my racing heart when I caught sight of someone at the edge of the room, watching me.

I looked up. It was Tori. Well, Tyrah.

"Hey Tobias," she said and started walking over to me. I nodded at her and went to my backpack to grab some water before I replied.

"Hi Tyrah," I said.

"You look tired," she said and I nodded.

"Couldn't sleep," I replied and she nodded, seemingly too understanding at my reasons.

"How are you coping?" she asked me and I looked at her puzzled. Did she know?

"How am I coping with what?" I asked.

"Candice," she said. "George and I stayed up talking all last night and he explained everything to me. We are going to make an effort to get to know each other and see how that goes," she explained and for a moment I felt jealous that George and Tyrah had formed an easy bond and were both going to be working on it. Given that they had both thought the other dead and hadn't seen each other in such a long time (longer than any of us), it was only right that they should be the first to reconcile.

"I see. Does Candice know?" I asked her nervously. I wasn't sure I wanted her to know. I thought it would make it more awkward between us.

"No. I'm not sure that would be a good idea," Tyrah said. "Based on my reactions at having a long lost brother, I don't know how Candice will go having a long lost love," Tyrah said and I thought it was quite level headed of her to think that way. She seemed quite considerate of the whole situation. Good attitude to have.

"How do you feel about it all?" I asked her. I did miss having Tori as a confidante. Tori was always ready to listen and help where she could, and being an older Dauntless, she was always full of experience and wise information.

"To be honest, I'm a little relieved that I'm not all alone in the world," she said. I nodded. "I always felt like part of me was missing and this is perhaps the reason," she added. Part of her missing? That was exactly how I felt about Tris.

"Shall we go to breakfast?" I asked and she smiled at me.

"I hope you're going to change first," she said and laughed.

"I had planned to, yes," I said and laughed as well. "See you in the mess hall?"

"Sounds great to me," she replied and we separated.

I went up to the instructor showers and showered and changed into some clean clothes before heading to breakfast. It was still reasonably empty so I sat down at an empty table and focused on my breakfast. It wasn't long before the buzz of people filled the hall and when I looked up, I noticed my table was practically full.

"How are you this morning Tobias?" Marly asked me, smiling. "You look tired."

"So everyone keeps telling me," I replied, grinning. "Did you sleep well?" I asked and Marly looked through her lashes at me, flirting slightly.

"I did," she said then turned to Zachuriah, "You snored Zach," she said, teasing him. Zach and Zeke. Cute. I wondered what their mum would make of it.

"So did you," he teased back and they grinned at each other.

"Did not," she said indignantly and we all laughed. I had missed having them all around.

Then in walked Tris/Candice. She was smiling to herself as she walked in and looked up as Zachuriah waved at her. Then she pinned her gaze on me and a soft smile lit her face. Was it Tris? Did she remember me? I forced myself to smile nonchalantly at her and focus back on my food.

Then she squeezed in next to me, between Marly.

"Morning," I said to her.

"Morning," she replied and she reached out and touched under my eye with her thumb. "You look tired," she said and I forced myself not to lean into her hand.

"Couldn't sleep," I muttered and she dropped her hand.

"Four!" came Amar's voice and I looked up. "Ten minutes in my office?" he asked and I nodded and I watched him leave the mess hall. I finished eating my last few mouthfuls then stood up.

"See you later," I said and left without looking at her expression.

I went up to Amar's office.

"Come in Four," he said as I approached his door, I hadn't even knocked yet.

"What's up?" I asked him.

"I wanted to see how you were doing," he said and I sighed.

"I'm struggling," I replied honestly.

"I can tell," he said and I remembered when he was my instructor. He knew me so well then. He could see all my flickers of emotion. And that wasn't always such a good thing. Right now when I needed the distance, he was making me face it.

"Not much I can do while they don't remember us. Just have to make her fall in love with me again," I said. But in order to do that, I needed to get some distance otherwise I would fall into a heap trying to do it. I would make it too much about Tris and not about Candice.

"And what about FourTris, have they contacted you again?" he asked me. He knew about FourTris?

"What's FourTris?" I asked, feigning innocence.

"They contacted me as well. Said they were working with you and had Cara and Matthew. But that's all the information we have," Amar said and I shook my head.

"Nothing new from them. I am hoping now the Protectors are here that someone will surface that we can actually speak with," I said.

"Fine," he said. "Let us know if you do hear anything," he added and I nodded. "I mean it Four, we are all on the same side."

"I know. I will," I said and he stood up and placed a hand on my shoulder. That made me remember Eric from the landscape. "Has there been any whispers about Eric?" I asked. Amar narrowed his eyes at me.

"Not that I have heard," he said. "Why?"

"Not sure yet," I answered and he just nodded.

"Ok well if you do get any information, let me know," he said and I nodded then left.

I figured I should go and do some work, so I started heading down the corridor, contemplating my next move with Candice. Then I bumped into someone hard and realised at the last second that it was Candice as she started falling backwards. I reached out and managed to grab her by the waist as I fell and somehow in the fall, we twisted so she landed on top of me.

"I'm sorry, I should have watched where I was going," I said and she looked startled but not upset.

"It's fine," she murmured and made no move to get up.

"Are you hurt?" I asked her and she shook her head, staring at me. What are you doing Tobias. Smooth move! Let go of the girl and get out of here!

"I'm ok now Tobias," she softly.

"Now?" I asked her.

"Yeah," she said, sounding mesmerised.

"Are you sure?" I asked her, wondering why she hadn't made a move to get up. I didn't think any part of her had been hurt, I'd surely cushioned her fall. My hands still rested loosely on her waist and as though they had a mind of their own, they began gently stroking her hips. Her hands had been planted firmly on my chest as we landed and they began gently feeling the material of my shirt. Then she seemed to snap out of the daze she was in and hastily pulled her hands away.

I sat up, cradling to her to me as I stood and righted her, letting go of her as soon as she was steady.

"I'm sorry I bumped into you," she said, staring at the floor. Oh great, now she couldn't even look at me. Way to go Tobias!

"No it was my fault. Anyway, I better go. See ya Candice," I said and began walking away. I hadn't gotten far when I turned to look back at her. She was staring at my retreating figure and held my gaze before I turned back around.

What the hell was I going to do?


	16. Chapter 16

Chapter 16

CANDICE

Last night when Tobias had left, I wasn't able to get him off my mind. After dinner we had all hung out in our dorm room playing card games before bed. I was pretty tired. I think they were still playing when I fell asleep. So now, laying on my bunk I thought about what happened yesterday when I bumped into Tobias. Everyone was still asleep around me and Zach was snoring.

I had been in my own little world and not paying attention to where I was going and smacked straight into him, hard. It was like hitting a wall of muscle, there wasn't much give in him. And so I started falling backwards. Then before I could blink, his hands were on my waist and I was laying on top of him. Surprisingly, neither of us were winded as we landed. He sure did have quick reflexes because I expected to hit the ground.

When he asked me if he was ok, I let too much out. I hadn't meant to tell him that I was ok now, not that he understood anyway. But it's like I was drowning in a sea of loneliness while I was living at Fort Bragg but since meeting him (all of a few days ago) I no longer felt that way. It's kind of like seeing the sun for the first time and being slowly warmed by it. It takes you by surprise and warms you from the inside, slowly thawing you.

But I am not who I think I am so why do I keep touching him? I am not a touchy-feely person like Marly. I like my personal space. And I did punch him afterall although that was pure instinct. I certainly wouldn't if he hugged me like at again. I had felt some kind of sheer need and a hint of desperation along with utter relief in his arms when he hugged me.

And yet, despite not being a touchy person, nor knowing him at all, I keep touching his arm or his shoulder when I talk to him. I can see it's hard for him. But I can't help myself. Other than being startled at some stranger hugging me, I actually enjoyed his hug. But who the hell was he? And why did he think I was someone else. Tris? Who was Tris?

I got up and got dressed and went in to breakfast. Tobias was sitting there talking to Tyrah and Marly. Marly was being her usual flirty self and for some reason, I didn't like it even though she was going out with Zach. And despite telling myself that I needed to keep my distance from Tobias, the first thing I did was squeeze in next to him.

"Morning," he said and started leaning into me to kiss me and then realised and pulled back, a look of pain flicking across his handsome face. Why was I making this harder for him but putting myself in his personal space? I seemed to want to be close to him which I didn't understand. I didn't like being close to people. Even the other Protectors. Although Zach had a way of getting up in your personal space in his charming manner. I was always the exception when it came to touching. The others hugged and kissed and touched all the time. I was a lot better and I had worked on my handshake so it was no longer like holding a limp fish.

"Morning Tobias," I replied and looked at him. He looked tired, almost as if he hadn't slept. I concentrated on my food and he didn't say any more. I was not even half way through my meal when he got up.

"Four," I heard someone call and we both looked up. Amar was waving him over.

"I'll see you later okay?" he said and left. I had blown it. Whatever 'it' was. Back off Candice. Back off. He obviously didn't feel about me the way I was inexplicably feeling about him. He'd barely said a sentence to me since catching me yesterday. He must think I was clumsy or a child or something. That was obviously why he wouldn't talk to me now.

The rest of the day passed by pretty quickly. We alternated between observing the current trainees and their technology, and training with them. I had another attempt at knife throwing, as did the others. And we all seemed to take to it well. I kept looking around to find Tobias but he wasn't there. Each meal when we went into the dining hall, I expected to see him sitting there, but he never was. I don't know why that disappointed me.

So did the next day.

And the next day.

And the next.

Training and more training. No Tobias.

I hoped he wasn't avoiding me. I lost all confidence in him coming back to see me. See us. He wouldn't be coming just to see me.

They also kept us reasonably secluded in the compound. It wasn't that we were like prisoners, but as they explained, we looked a lot like people they used to know and that would cause some extreme emotional behaviour. Plus we didn't know our way around the city and it had been hard enough getting here in the first place without getting lost.

But now, it was a couple of weeks later and very early in the morning. I couldn't sleep. I was ridiculously tired, but couldn't sleep. The others were out for the count. I changed into some pants and a v necked shirt and decided to workout with the punching bag. It had been a while since I had lost myself in it.

As I walked in, there he was in all his glory. He was working out using a punching bag himself and I stood back and watched him. He was magnificent. Every punch, elbow, knee and kick sent the bag flying backwards. He was wearing pants and a singlet and his arms gleamed with sweat. He was concentrating on what he was doing and didn't notice me for a few minutes so I had an unguarded view of him. He seemed quite emotional based on the way he was hitting and the sounds he made so I didn't want to disturb him.

I was just about to leave when I heard him call out to me. "Tris, uh I mean Candice," he said, quickly correcting himself. And it made me remember that I wasn't the one he wanted. He wiped his palms over his face to either wipe off the sweat or tears. Or both.

"Hi Tobias," I said as I walked over to him. "I haven't seen you around much," I said though it was more like a question.

"Yeah I have been pretty busy," he replied lamely. "What are you doing up so early anyway?"

"Couldn't sleep. Thought I would come work out," I said and he nodded.

"I couldn't sleep either," he said, explaining his appearance. I had learnt that he lived away from the training compound and only came in to visit so I figured it was a pretty rough night for him if he couldn't sleep and had come all the way here to work out. "I was just finishing up," he said and started packing up his kit.

"No, please stay," I said and his hand paused. I had missed the sight of him from the few brief times I had met him so far. And that surprised me as well. I had never been attracted to someone before. Sure, Zach was handsome and attractive, and Bill had his charms. But I was not attracted to them. I was however attracted to the broody Tobias.

"Would you like to go for a walk?" he asked and I nodded eagerly. Partially eager to spend time with him, and partially because I wanted to get out of the compound and see more sun. "Let me just shower and change. I will meet you back here?" he asked and I nodded. I figured I should probably change from my workout gear so we both left.

I took off my training clothes and stared at myself in the mirror. I have three scars from bullet wounds, two close together in my shoulder and one near my hip. I only vaguely remember what they are from. A man in a wheelchair was shooting me. David, I think. I don't remember why or where, only that when I woke up, I was connected to different IV's and tubes and in Fort Bragg. They told me I was protecting the city of Jericho and amnesia was common after such a traumatic incident. That one day I may remember.

Then I was recruited into the Protectors and trained at Fort Bragg with the others. I knew all of them, had history with all of them and we trained hard to protect Jericho. It was only recently we had been requested to be dispatched to Chicago to receive further training and continue the Protection program here under the command and with the assistance of Tobias and the other trainers at the compound.

We had heard rumours along the way about a resistance group forming an uprising against the people's elected government claiming to be conducting a range of freaky mind controlling experiments.

And so here we were. I hadn't brought many clothes with me but Marly, being quite girly, had insisted I bring at least one dress. And so the one dress I brought is knee length and while it isn't a full skirt, it isn't stuck tight to my thighs either. It's comfortable though fitting. I took the tie from my hair and left my hair down in blonde waves. I adjusted the top of the dress so it sat properly with the v-neck showing off the tattoos on my collarbone. Three ravens, one for each of my family I had been shot protecting in Jericho.

I left a note for the others then I walked back down to the training room and Tobias was leaning against the wall waiting for me. "Wow," he murmured. I couldn't help but feel ridiculously pleased. I tried to hide my smile. His eyes narrowed then widened as he looked at the tattoo on my collarbone. "It is you," he whispered then shook his head to clear it. He cleared his throat nervously. "Shall we go?" he asked.

"Sure," I replied looking up into his handsome face. I remembered how blue his eyes were. He had very long lashes and his eyes were a dark blue. A dreaming colour. He held out his hand, and instinctively, I took it and we went for a stroll through the streets. They were deserted given how early it was. I wondered where we were going until we came to a pylon. Tobias began climbing. I looked up at him curiously, then shrugged and followed him up.

There were train tracks there. "Get ready," Tobias said and I tilted my head to the side. For what? Then I heard the low rumbling of the approaching train. I could see lights approaching in the distance. When I looked back, Tobias had started running and I ran to catch up as the train caught up with us. We were jumping the train? Fair enough.

Tobias reached out and grabbed the handle, pulling himself up smoothly into the carriage. He looked amazing doing that. I reached out to grab the handle but Tobias was already there, grabbing my arm and pulling me in. "I can do it myself," I said indignantly. Last thing I wanted him to think was that I was some simpering little girl.

"I know," he said grinning at me, not put off by my outburst and I couldn't help but smile back. Something about this felt familiar. We both sat down next to each other, leaning against the back wall of the carriage. We were there for a while and the gentle rock and roll of the carriage relaxed me and I closed my eyes.

"Do you want to know what we are doing?" he asked me and I opened my eyes again.

"Not really," I replied. I just wanted to spend time with him. Stupid though that was. He ignored my response and told me anyway.

"I thought we might go chill at my place. Maybe watch a movie and have lunch somewhere?"

"Sounds good," I answered. Though I was a little nervous at going to his place. Suddenly the carriage rocked hard and I fell into him. He wrapped an arm around me.

"Steady," he said, his mouth close to my ear and I shivered, leaning into him.

"I've missed you coming around," I said and he hugged me tighter to his chest.

"I'm sorry," he murmured and kissed the top of my head. "I'm sorry but we have to get up now," he said and disentangled himself and stood. He put his hand out to help me up. I took it and looked at the muscles bulging in his arm as he pulled me up.

I looked out the carriage door. The train didn't seem to be making a move to slow down much. I looked up at Tobias. "We're jumping?" I asked and he nodded, grinning at me.

"Ready?" he asked and I nodded, excited. He took my hand and pulled me a few steps back toward the back of the carriage. "On three, one… two… three!" he said and pulled me with him and we jumped onto a grassed embankment. I was surprised when we both remained standing. I was quite impressed with myself. I had half expected myself to stack it in front of him and remind him how clumsy I was.

He took my hand again and we walked slowly to his apartment. I was enjoying the feel of the sun and tilted my head up towards it as we walked. We walked in silence, but it wasn't awkward as it had been. It was more a comfortable, companionable silence.

"Are you ok with this or would you prefer we didn't go to my apartment?" Tobias suddenly asked me. How could he know what I was scared of? I stopped and looked at him.

"No it's fine," I said and smiled at him. He smiled down at me then lifting his free hand, brought it to my face to tuck a piece of hair behind my ear. I struggled to concentrate on my breathing. His touch was so light.

"Are you sure?" he asked and I nodded. "Good, because we're here," he said and chuckled and we went up the stairs to his apartment.

"Nice place," I said as he let us in. I walked over to the couch.

"Did you want anything to drink?" he asked me and I shook my head and sat down, slightly nervously. "Movie?" he asked me as he approached the cupboard next to the TV.

"Sounds good," I replied and he put a disc into the player and then disappeared for a second and reappeared with a blanket and sat down next to me. I was very aware of him sitting there, though he didn't make a move towards me other than to cover both out laps with the blanket. The material was really soft and it strangely eased some of my tension. I could feel the heat emanating from him and felt drawn to it.

As the credits rolled up, I leaned against the arm of the couch, laying on the cushion and rested my legs up on the couch and he placed them over his lap and rested his hand on my knee. His hand was so warm.

I pulled the blanket up to my chin and snuggled down, enjoying the warmth and comfort, but something was missing. The opening scenes rolled by but I barely noticed them, I was concentrating on the feeling of his thumb rubbing my knee. It felt nice. I looked up at Tobias and noticed he was gazing at me fondly.

I rolled onto my side and he slipped down behind me on the couch until we were lying flush against each other with his chest to my back and his body cradling mine. That's what was missing, I thought as he placed a hand around my waist. His other arm slipped under my head under the cushion, seeking my hand and he grasped it.

"Is this ok?" he whispered, his breath tickling my ear.

"Yes," I whispered back and he snuggled into my neck, pulling me tightly against him. I felt my whole body relax. I put my other arm over his across my waist and held his other hand. It was so comfortable. I knew I was getting too close to him, but I couldn't help it. I closed my eyes, thinking this was what bliss felt like. I felt myself starting to drift. I thought I felt his lips graze my neck, but I was too relaxed to react.

"I love you," I thought I heard him whisper as I fell asleep.


	17. Chapter 17

Chapter 17

TOBIAS

It was dark outside when I next opened my eyes. I hadn't slept so well in weeks. Cradling her body to mine and the warmth generated between us was so comforting, so just… amazing. Words couldn't even come close to describing how I felt at the moment. In all the times we had fallen asleep together, I had never felt as I did now. I don't know if it was the fact that she had died and I never expected to see her again or if it the fact we weren't in open war, leading a rebellion or on the run, in fear of our lives.

But right now, snuggled against her warm body on the couch, there was no place I'd rather be. If everything that had happened so far was for us to get to this point, it was completely worth it. I had never felt so relaxed and at peace, even though she didn't yet remember me. That would come with time.

Given how dark it was outside, my whole apartment was dimly lit but there was a subdued light shining through the window onto her face. I studied her face. She looked so relaxed and at peace herself. I wondered if she felt as I did, laying here. I couldn't believe I had fallen asleep, nor that I had slept the whole day. I had barely slept in days and then ten minutes laying with her and we were both asleep. I also snuck another look at the tattoo on her collarbone. It was the same as Tris'. It had to be her.

Though I could look at her forever, I snuggled back down into her neck and kissed just below her ear. I wasn't trying to wake her but I felt the urge to do it. "I love you," I whispered and she stirred but didn't awaken. I fell asleep again.

This time when I opened my eyes, the first thing I saw was her eyes only a few inches away from mine, staring at me. She had turned to face me at some point, her arm over my waist, my arms still hugging her tightly to me. Our legs were layered together, hers then mine then hers then mine. She was practically enveloped by my body.

"Hi," she said shyly.

"Hi," I said back and leant forward, closing the distance between us and pressed my forehead to hers. She ducked her head and hid in the crook of my neck shyly. Tris had never been this shy with me… well actually that's a lie. She had been that shy, we both had. "Are you ok?" I asked her. I needed her to be ok with this.

"That was the best sleep I have had in so long," she murmured into my neck, not answering my question.

"I know, I can't believe we slept all day," I replied into her hair.

"We both needed it," she said.

"So are you ok?" I asked her again and pulled back to look at her. She looked up at me and didn't say anything for a moment.

"Yes," she whispered hesitantly and slowly a smile lit up her face. "Yes I am," she said, her voice more confident this time.

"Good," I said and brought my lips to hers, kissing her lips softly, gently grazing my lips over hers. Her hand grasped the back of my neck. I stopped and looked at her again. She had her eyes closed and she pulled me back down to her and her lips met mine again. The hand she had over my waist came around to my hip, clutching me to her but she made no move to put her hand under my shirt to feel my skin like Tris used to.

I had to keep reminding myself that she wasn't Tris. She was Candice. I couldn't rush her or I would risk losing her. It was a tall order to make my body remember when she kissed me like this. We lay flush up against each other kissing, until the sun came up. I forced my hands to remain as they were, not pushing her beyond her limits and hers never touched my skin.

Eventually both our stomachs were grumbling and we got up. I made breakfast of homemade pancakes from a recipe I had learn from Alma and we both sat at the table, demolishing them. Neither of us spoke about what had happened, but made idle chit chat. She did seem to be pensive and I hoped she wasn't over thinking anything.

"We should get back," she said eventually and I sighed. I would have preferred to stay here with her forever.

"Do you want to actually watch the movie?" I asked, thinking about snuggling up with her again and her face softened and we shared a smile. Then her face turned serious again.

"No, we should get back," she said again and I nodded, trying not to let the hurt show.

"Sure," I said and forced a smile. She looked down. I think she knew it was forced.

"I'm sorry," she said and I walked over to her and wrapped her in a hug. Her arms stayed by her side.

"It's ok," I said and slowly her thin arms came up around me and she hugged me back. She buried her face in my chest and I rested my head on hers. "It's ok," I said again and tightened my arms around her.

"We should go," she said again but made no move to let go of me.

"I know," I replied and she looked up at me. I leant down and kissed her again quickly then looked at her. Her hand snaked up into my hair and I brought my lips back down to hers and she trembled in my arms.

"No," she said, when we stopped a while later. "Let's go."

"Ok," I said and let go of her, packing up and locking up. We caught the train back into the compound and I delighted in the excitement she had in catching the train. So I decided to take her the back way. The old initiate way. Perhaps doing things that were familiar to her, would jog her memory? I hoped that didn't include ziplining.

"I have to jump?" she asked me, looking over the edge of the building at the gap below.

"Yep," I replied, nodding. She stared at it, absorbing the information and the view.

"Ok," she replied a minute later and grinned at me, apparently liking the challenge.

"See you down there," I said and started to climb the edge to jump off.

"No, I want to go first," she said and my heart skipped a beat. Did she remember?

"Sure," I replied and watched her carefully. No, she didn't remember. She climbed up onto the ledge and I was excited to actually watch her jump for the first time instead of just being the first to receive her at the bottom. She swallows hard then bends her knees and jumps. I quickly lean over the ledge to watch her plummet. And even though I know there is a net at the bottom and that she is in no danger, my heart skips a beat as the fear hits me.

She disappears through the dark hole and I hold my breath. A second later she lets out a whoop of delight and I feel myself relax as a grin sweeps across my face. I give her a few moments to clear off the net before I tumble down myself. The air whistles past my face as I fall and I feel the familiar sensation in my stomach before I land safely on the net and bounce a few times before rolling off. She's standing there staring at me, looking excited and windswept.

"That was fantastic," she said. I grinned at her.

"I have an activity that you will love," I said and she smiled at me. "Me, not so much. But you… definitely love it."

"Why don't you like it?" she asked me.

"Fear of heights," I answered.

"But if you're afraid of heights, why did you come this way into the compound?" she asked, tilting her head to one side. That was an interesting question. I had never thought about it that way and yet I came this way occasionally. Perhaps falling into known safety was different to falling into the unknown… but then why didn't I like ziplining? That was falling into known safety.

"I don't know," I replied honestly. She assessed my expression for a minute before we went inside.

"Thanks for yesterday, but I think we should keep it between us," she said as we walked through the tunnels. That sounded like a blow off if I had ever heard one. She definitely wasn't Tris right now. Admittedly there were times when I forgot. But right now, there was a very clear distinction between the two.

"Fine," I said curtly. My response was a little abrupt but I refused to say anything else. She had evidently made her decision. And as usual with Tris, I didn't always agree but she would inevitably have her way. Or would she? "Why?" I asked and stopped walking. She went a couple of extra steps before realising I was no longer beside her.

"Because," she said stubbornly, lifting her chin and wrapping her arms around herself.

"Because why?" I prompted and closed the distance between us but didn't touch her.

"Just because," she said and looked down. I put a finger under her chin and made her look up at me.

"Why?" I asked softly. She lifted her eyes to mine and placed a hand around my wrist and I was expecting her to pull my hand away but she didn't.

"Because I will get hurt," she said, so quietly I had to strain to listen.

"I would never hurt you Tris," I said and realised my error, "I mean Candice," I said quickly correcting myself but the damage was done. She pulled my hand away and stepped back.

"I'm not Tris, Tobias. My name is Candice," she said, pain making her voice hoarse.

"I know you're not," I said quickly.

"Do you though? I grew up with a mother, father and brother in Jericho. Their names are Natalia, Andy and Caleb. I have the tattoos on my collarbone to remind me of them. I was sent out here to assist with your training and further my own and to help defend against some crazy group who want to tear the town apart," she said quickly, keeping her voice low as she glared at me. "I did not come here for you to pretend I am someone else."

"I'm not pretending you are someone else Candice," I said trying to explain. "You will understand soon I hope, but for now, please just trust me," I said beseechingly.

"No Tobias. This can't go on. It was nice enough spending the day with you yesterday catching up on sleep. But we can't keep going," she said and dropped her eyes again.

"Please Candice," I said and moved closer to her, pulling her into my arms and pressing my lips to hers. I had to make her realise what she was walking away from. Her arms instinctively went around me and she kissed me back.

For about all of ten seconds.

Then she pulled back and slapped me hard.

"Don't do that again," she said, her voice breaking. "I don't feel about you the same way you feel about me. I am not Tris," she said and ran off.

I stood there staring after her with my hand on my stinging cheek. Now I had really blown it. But her behaviour belied her words. She had slept in my arms all day and most of the night. She had even put her arms around me, hugging me tightly to her. She had stayed there as we lay kissing. For hours. She had responded in every way, kissing me back and spending time with me. She had even kissed me back just now, her thin arms wrapping around me tightly.

Or was I just reading into it what I wanted to? I wanted her so much to be Tris. To just have her memory gone. Was it possible that she had just kissed me for the sake of it? That she just stayed with me because she was enjoying getting a good sleep? Was it possible that it wasn't actually her? I couldn't believe that Tris, even in an amnesic state, would push me away like this. Perhaps she had been trying to tell me that all along.

It couldn't be her. It can't be her. I was wrong. I had to be wrong. The pain at this realisation was crushing. I sat down with my back against the wall and dry sobs wracked my body. I couldn't believe I had been so stupid, so needy. And now I had wrecked a potentially good thing with someone who made me feel alive again. What the hell had I done? I needed the memory serum. I couldn't keep going like this, being with her without being with her.

Tris.

I needed to contact Tris.

I needed to go back into the landscape or something. I ran through the hallways and locked myself in the landscape rooms. I set it up and injected the serum. But all it was, was my fear landscape.

Heights.

Confinement.

Evelyn.

Tris dead.

But no actual Tris. I came back, frustrated. I forced myself to focus on my breathing, trying to calm down. I would have to see her through concentration. I mentally chanted to myself, breathe in, hold, breathe out. Breathe in, hold, breathe out. And I tuned out all the noise, focusing on the sounding of my heart beat, slowing it down until I was relaxed.

Then I reminisced about every time I had spent with Tris. From the time I first really saw her when she jumped, to the night we had spent together before she faced David. I focused on the details of each encounter with her – the look of her hair, the emotions and expression on her face, her knife throwing, her improvements in shooting, her words, her voice and the feeling of her body in my arms and lips on mine.

But still no Tris.

What had I done?


	18. Chapter 18

Sorry for the delay guys! Just wanted to get it right :)

* * *

Chapter 18

CANDICE

Why did I do that? Why did I push him away? Was it just because he thought I was Tris. Yes, that was why. He didn't want me, he wanted her. He would always want her. I wanted him to want me for me not because I looked like her. Or reminded him of her. Or whatever. I didn't even know anything about her, only that I was actually jealous of her. I had never really been jealous of anyone in my life but I was fiercely jealous now and I didn't like it. Who was she that he would hold on so tightly to her memory and wish I was her? How could I ever compare with that?

But honestly, it was almost worth the inevitable hurt just to kiss him. And fall asleep in his arms. And have his arms around me.

Almost.

I had never felt as I did when I fell asleep with him. And I had definitely never kissed anyone the way I had kissed him. I can't believe I stopped it the last time by slapping him. It was so hard to slap him and then walk away.

What the hell was wrong with me?

I tried to think about my oldest memory. A time from when I was little. But other than glimpses of my mother with her hair pulled back neatly and wearing a grey dress, I couldn't remember anything. Nothing before waking up in Fort Bragg. Was it possible that Tobias was right? Could it be that I don't remember because of something they did to me? Was it all a lie?

It had been a week since I had slapped him.

A week since I had seen him.

A week too long, really.

I still hadn't gotten him out of my head or off my mind. I was still thinking about it all and trying to make a decision. I sat down on the edge of my bed and put my head in my hands, dismayed. How could I see him and not be with him? But how could I see him and be with him? I kept going over all the possible scenarios in my mind even though it wasn't like me to procrastinate like this. I normally made a decision and stuck with it.

I must have sat there like that for a while because the next thing I knew, Marly was there trying to coax me into going to dinner. Apparently it was that time of the day. I must have skipped lunch. I hated going in there knowing that he wasn't there. And yet, I had brought this on myself. I only had myself to blame.

"Come on Candice, stop brooding and come to dinner," Mar said. "Not sure what happened between you two, but you're both being miserable and bad company," she added.

"You know Mar, I'm not very hungry," I said looking up at her. Then I thought about her flirting with Tobias and something in me decided that I **should** go to dinner. Plus, despite pushing him away, I ached to see him again. "But what are you talking about?"

"I know, but you should come anyway," she said, sitting down next to me and putting an arm around my shoulders. "I've been trying to cheer him up but he isn't having a bar of it. It's you he wants to see," she said.

"I know I should eat," I replied but didn't make a move to get up. "But I'm not sure it's me he wants. And that's the problem."

"Come on Candice," Mar prompted, ignoring my last statement and I nodded. She got up then pulled me to my feet and we both went in to dinner. She walked in the door ahead of me, smiling and waving at Zach. But when I saw Tobias sitting by himself, my heart ached and I stopped dead in my tracks. He looked terrible. He looked terrible and it was all my fault. Could I really do this to him? Could I do this to myself just because I was scared of possibly getting hurt?

He looked up at me and swallowed hard then looked back down at his food. I went in and sat down next to him.

"You look terrible," I said softly, putting my hand on his. He looked at me and smiled sadly. I went to take my hand away but he gripped my fingers in his.

"You look amazing," he said back and a piece of my wall crumbled. His thumb rubbed the top of my hand gently.

"What have you been doing since I saw you last?" I asked him.

"You mean other than think about spending an amazing day and night with you, falling asleep with you, kissing you and then finishing it off by fighting with you?" he countered, almost bitterly. I had never seen him like this. I couldn't believe I was running away just because I was scared. I didn't say anything for a moment and he took a deep breath.

"I'm sorry," I said finally, quietly. He turned and rounded on me.

"Since when have you ever backed away from something because you were scared of being hurt?" he asked me and I looked at him surprised. Again, it was like he knew what I was thinking and feeling.

"I don't know," I answered. Was he right? Was I running away for the wrong reasons? I looked down at his plate, it was empty. "Can we go for a walk and talk?" I asked.

"So you can slap me again when I kiss you?" Tobias asked, staring at me. "No thanks." Wait, he still wanted to kiss me after how I had behaved? Why did I pathetically like that idea?

"Please Tobias," I asked and he sighed again.

"I can't Candice."

"Please," I asked once more. I couldn't stand to see him so haggard. I had to make this better. But could I make him happy at my own expense? I needed to work this out.

"Fine," he said eventually, "but after you eat something." I rolled my eyes at him.

"Fine," I replied and put some food on my plate and after a few mouthfuls, I asked, "Why did you kiss me?"

"You want to have this discussion here?" he asked and I looked around, hesitated, then nodded. I needed to know. I needed to have the facts if I was going to make a decision about where to go from here with Tobias. I needed to know if it was going to be worth the hurt.

"Please, help me understand," I said.

"Can it wait until we go somewhere?" he asked me and I looked at him.

"Ok," I said softly.

"If you give me a chance and just trust me, I will answer all of your questions and take away all of your fears Candice," he said and I felt another piece of my wall disappear. Damn him. Why was he so damn wonderful?

"Ok," I said again and stared at my food. I wasn't sure I could eat but I wanted to know.

"Eat," he said and I gave him an unimpressed look. He actually laughed at me and I was relieved to see him laugh.

"Fine," I said and took another mouthful.

"Fine," he said, trying not to snort while he was laughed at me.

Eventually my plate was practically empty. "Good enough?" I asked.

"Good enough, you ready?" he asked and stood up. I nodded and followed him. We walked to a different part of the compound than I had seen since I had been here, until we entered a set of out of the way sleeping quarters.

"Where are we?" I asked, looking around.

"These were my quarters when I was a trainer here," he answered. "Apparently no one has moved into them yet," he added. "I thought it would be a good place for us to talk uninterrupted."

"Sure," I said, suddenly nervous. We sat down on the edge of the unmade bed. "How did you know they were empty?" I asked him.

"I went for a walk. I needed some space to think."

"I was a bit the same," I admitted.

"Seems we were both rather affected by what happened," he said and looked at me knowingly.

I wondered if this room brought back memories for him because I was having some odd sense of dejavu but what I mostly remembered was being hurt. I somehow knew Tobias wasn't the cause, that he was a source of comfort. Was this a memory? Or was my mind just making things up? Was my mind trying to rationalise being here with him in this situation? Being scared of being hurt although something made me think the last time was physical not emotional.

"Are you ok?" he asked me, taking my hand in his.

"I think so," I answered. We sat there in silence for a minute and his thumb began stroking my hand again. "So answer my question," I said taking my hand out of his and crossing my arms tightly across my chest.

"Which one?" he asked and I saw the hint of a smile play at his lips. He just wanted me to say it.

"You know which one," I replied, narrowing my eyes and this time he did smile.

"I do not know what you're referring to," he said, faking aloofness and I started to smile back. He poked me in the ribs, tickling me and I giggled, shrieking and pulled away, dashing off the bed. He was quick as a flash.

"Come on Tobias," I said giggling as he came after me. "Stop tickling me!" He chased me around the bed and caught me around the waist and tickled me again as I giggled uncontrollably. "Tobias!" I protested again and he stopped his ticklish torture, though his hands stayed on my waist. I remembered how warm they were and I could feel their warmth now through my shirt.

"I'm just trying to make you laugh," he said softly as he pulled me back to him.

"I hate how much it's working," I replied as we sat down again. "So why did you kiss me?" I asked him again.

"Because I wanted to," he answered, I felt unsatisfactorily. He must have noticed the somewhat sour look on my face. He didn't say anything and I thought about what else I wanted to know. This didn't really say much for his "I will answer all your questions and take away your fears". Short answers like this didn't do much for either of those points.

"Do you still want to kiss me?" I asked

"You know I do," he breathed and I flushed.

"Why?" I asked.

"Because I like you."

"Why? Is it because you think I am her?" I asked and held my breath. Please don't be because you think I am her or you wish I was her.

"No Candice," he said and pulled my hand to his lips and kissing my knuckles. "I like you because you are smart and kind and caring. You are fiery and mysterious and stubborn and frustrating. Regardless of having similar traits to Tris, I would have fallen for you anyway." Well that was a revelation.

Ok, so that wall that I said was crumbling… what wall? It was now non-existent.

"But you don't even really know me," I said, still futilely trying to fight the inevitable.

"You know that's not true," Tobias said softly, pulling me into his arms. "We both know each other more than you think." It was true, I did feel like I knew him deep down, even though I had actually only known him for a couple of weeks. How else would I feel this way about him?

"Fallen for me?" I asked. He smiled down at me. I was fishing and we both knew it. I wanted him to say it.

"Yes, Candice. I have fallen for you. This last week apart from you has been ridiculously difficult. Perhaps it wouldn't have been as hard had we not spent a night together. And had we not kissed. But we did and we have. And I can't stop thinking about kissing you again."

"Are you sure it is me that you want and not Tris," I asked, protesting one last time.

"I want you. Just you," he said and brought his lips to mine and I was lost. His arms wrapped around me tightly as his body enveloped mine as we lay back on the unmade bed. He pulled back an inch and looked at me. "I couldn't bear the thought of losing you," he said, his voice hoarse with emotion. "You know I will always find you. Always!" he said emphatically.

"I know," I said and somehow it was true. I did know he would always find me.

"So are you still afraid?" he asked me.

"How could I be?" I replied and he smiled.

"Good," he said and brought his lips back to mine. Then I stopped to look at him.

"I have something to tell you. I might be in love with you," I said, smiling a little, repeating words that sounded familiar to me, "I'm waiting until I'm sure to tell you though." Tobias looks at me, completely startled. Are the words familiar to him as well?

"That's sensible of you," he says, smiling back at me. "We should find some paper so you can make a list or a chart or something." His response sounds similar, like something I would say. I laugh into his chest.

"Maybe I'm already sure and I just don't want to frighten you," I add. He laughs, the sound rumbling though him and he hugs me.

"Then you should know better," he says, grinning. The conversation is sounding very familiar. Then his gaze changes and he moves his hands to cup my face, staring me square in the face. "I love you," he says then whispers, "I've always loved you," his breath tickling my ear before he kissed just underneath my ear before trailing down my neck and across my collarbone.

"I love you too Tobias," I whisper and then completely lose my train of thought as our kisses become all-consuming. We are so devoted and ardent in our affection for each other, so totally consumed by each other that we didn't notice the room filling with people.

A group of people in masks burst through from all directions and a bunch of them started shouting orders menacingly. Who the hell did these guys think they were? How did they breach the compound? How did they find us in an unused section of the building? What did they want… or who? Us? They were dressed all in black and most moved with the grace of athletes or fighters… or both.

"Get down on the floor and no one gets hurt," said a man with a deep voice. Something about the voice tweaked a memory but I couldn't work out what it was. Tobias and I instinctively went into defence mode and started fighting back. I landed a few good hits on the two who were trying to pin me but a third joined them and they managed to get the drop on me.

I was pinned on the ground with my cheek on the mat and someone's knee buried in my back forcing my arm forwards, straining at my shoulder painfully.

"Let me go," I said, struggling against them in vain. "What do you want with us?" I asked.

"Candice," Tobias yelled as he saw me hit the floor.

"Unless you want her hurt, you will do exactly as I say," the man said again and I saw Tobias look at me anxiously, still resisting. "Now Tobias!" the man bellowed.

"Don't hurt her," Tobias said and gave in to their demands. "Down on the ground Tobias," the man said and Tobias was "assisted" to the ground next to me. Tobias reached out for me. My mind raced about how we could get out of this situation and work out what was going on.

I felt something cold and sharp press against my neck as they injected something into my neck and everything went black.


	19. Chapter 19

From LostInYou-TDG

Yes... sorry but I love a good cliffy! I'll try not to leave you hanging too much!

* * *

Chapter 19

TOBIAS

I woke up with a headache and Candice asleep across my chest, snuggled into me. What on earth? Where were we? What had happened? My mind tried to make sense of it as I looked around us carefully, trying not to disturb the sleeping Candice. We were on a bed with a blanket draped over us. There was a lamp lit in the corner of the room. The room was clean and tidy and there was a night stand next to the bed that contained a glass of water.

I let my mind drift back. I had been kissing Candice. We admitted how we felt and essentially made up. Then what? Think, Tobias. Oh right, the men wearing masks. My hand lifted to my neck. There was a small lump that was quite warm to touch. Not painful exactly, but rather uncomfortable. I smoothed Candice's hair back away from her neck. She had the lump too. What had they injected us with?

I found it odd, that despite their menacing appearance when we were taken, we weren't tied up, chained or restrained in any way. We were quite comfortable on the bed and didn't appear in any immediate danger.

"Candice," I whispered. She didn't stir. "Candice," I said again, louder and she groaned then her eyes flicked open and I saw her take in her surroundings as I had. We both sat up.

"What? Where are we?" she asked, as confused as I was.

"I don't know. Remember the men in masks?" I asked her and she nodded, her hand going to her neck.

"So where are we?" she asked.

"I don't know," I replied and unwrapped my arms from around her.

"Shall we look around?" she asked and I nodded and we began to check out the room. There was nothing about the room that indicated where we were or even what times of day it was. The only window in the room was covered by thick curtains. Candice went to have a look out the window, and it brought back that memory of Tris being shot in my fear landscape. Actually, it had started somewhat similarly to this. We had woken up together though the location had been different. And we had woken up to noise before. But the fear of losing her again shot through me savagely.

"Don't," I said vehemently, forcing myself not to shout. Candice turned and looked at me and must have seen the fear and pain on my face because she stopped and came back over to me and wrapped her arms around my neck tightly, pressing up against me. My arms went around her and I crushed her to me.

"It's ok," she whispered in my ear, hugging me hard to her. "I'm here." She obviously read the flicker of my emotions well.

"I'm sorry," I said and my voice broke. I hugged her fiercely. "I just can't lose you," I said. The thought of losing her again almost broke me.

"I'm here Tobias. I'm not going anywhere. It's ok," she whispered again then kissed me. For some reason, that helped calm me down. "You ok?" she asked me afterward and I hesitated before nodding.

"Yeah."

"Shall we go check out the who, what and where of this?" she asked me and I hesitated. She pulled me with her to the door and we opened it slowly, peering around it defensively. I couldn't believe my eyes!

Andrew and Natalie Prior (Tris' parents), sitting there calmly waiting for us. They were chatting quietly to each other and smiling, sitting at what looked like the round table I saw in the landscape. Were they manipulating it from here? Did they have new personalities too? Or did they remember everything? Candice ran over and hugged her mother.

"We apologise for the appearance of brute force," Andrew Prior said, "but we needed to make it seem like we were foe not friend in case you were being watched."

"So even if we had resisted, if **I **had continued to resist, you wouldn't have hurt her?"

"Of course not. She's my daughter. Plus I'm not sure violence is ever necessary," Andy replied and I smiled slightly. That was very typical response of the Andrew of Abnegation that I remembered.

"Was that a test?" I asked, unimpressed with their antics. "To see if I would allow your daughter to be hurt on my account?"

"No dear," Natalie said gently and somewhat apologetically. "We already know how you feel about our daughter. But we needed to contact you properly. Both of you," she added. Properly? Meaning they already had? Were they FourTris? It explained the ForTris then FourTris correction I mused. As her parents they would do what they could for her. The FourTris would have been more so to catch my attention and it certainly did.

"So Mr and Mrs Prior, you're back?" I asked and they smiled at me.

"I guess you could say that," Andrew said. "I'm Andy and this is Natalia," he explained. So if they were new personalities then it meant they couldn't be FourTris. They would only know Tris as Candice and me as Tobias. Though how they knew me at all, I wasn't sure.

"Do you remember before?" I asked and Natalia winked at me. I guessed that meant that they did. Was it that they weren't going to give me the information in front of Candice? I changed tactics. "And if I said FourTris?"

"You would be correct," Natalia answered, letting go of Candice to sit down at the table. Candice came back over to me, standing closely to me and put an arm around my waist. She definitely wasn't Tris right now. There was no way Tris from Abnegation would show any kind of affection in front of her parents – even just an arm around my waist.

"Can someone please explain this to me?" I asked, frustrated. No one ever gave me any real information. I always felt like I was trying to make a house out of matches in the dark.

"What would you like to know?" Andy asked.

"Where are Cara and Matthew? Are they safe?" I asked, my tone bordering an accusation.

"They are here, and yes they are safe. Would you like to see them?" Natalia answered me patiently. She wasn't affected by my tone at all.

"Yes please. Are there any more of you?" I asked, trying to make my tone more civil. Andy gave a nod, I thought in answering my question, but turned out he was nodding to someone who was watching. And in walked Lynn, Eric, Cara and Matthew.

Cara ran over and hugged Candice. I barely noticed. I was too distracted by Eric. I wasn't sure I liked the idea of Eric being here. In fact I knew I didn't like the idea of Eric being here. The only thing that prevented me from charging across the room to restrain him, was the fact he looked more like the Eric in my landscape. The one who had prompted me to admit that Tris was back. I also saw Matthew walk over towards me.

"Are you alright Cara?" I asked her, without taking my eyes off Eric.

"I'm fine. It has been good getting to know the leaders of FourTris," she said and Eric smiled at me. I narrowed my eyes.

"What about you Matthew," I asked.

"I'm well thank you Tobias," he replied and put a hand on my shoulder briefly, giving it a squeeze.

"My name is Liana," Lynn said, coming over to shake my hand firmly. Her hair was still as short as ever. "And this is Ethan," she added, introducing Eric. I would be very surprised if Ethan wasn't the same as Eric always had been given that all the others were the same as they had been. Although Eric did look much better with the long, greasy hair. He almost looked presentable now.

"Good to meet you Liana," I said, ignoring Eric.

"I know all your prejudices and preconceived ideas about me Four," Ethan said, "but please know that that cruel persona does not accurately portray me now."

"I'll believe that when I see it," I said and Ethan grinned at me.

"Good," he said and I was a little confused. He was actually willing to prove it? Perhaps he actually had changed. Only time would tell. I tried to think of what I could ask and how I could ask it, without upsetting Candice. If she thought I only wanted her because she reminded me of Tris, she would be hurt again. She didn't yet know that she **was** Tris.

"So why did you take Matthew and Cara?"

"They were being hunted by the Revolutionists. We needed to make it look like they were taken hostilely so they would no longer be in danger," Andy explained.

"As annoying as it has been to be hidden from our friends and family Tobias, it has been a necessary evil. We have been safe here. And we have deduced some of the motivations behind the Revolutionists. I am sorry to tell you Tobias, that it seems Christina is involved," Cara said and put a hand on my arm.

"I can't believe she would betray us like that!" I said, outraged. Candice looked at me surprised. I hadn't really spoken to her about Christina and the two of them hadn't yet met. I actually hadn't seen Christina in weeks. "So what have you deduced?"

"Well as you know, they have been claiming we have the technology and the programs in place to wipe peoples' memories and "implant" them with the memories we want, calling it Project Tabula Rasa – the Blank Slate. This would allow us to create soldiers of a particular faction with the personalities, prejudices and memories that we like. It would also allow us to create and control political leaders and essentially do whatever we want. We of course don't have that technology and wouldn't create it," Matthew explained. "It would put a whole new spin on the memory serums we have been developing and would look at long term engagements rather than short transmitter bursts. It would be similar to the serum used in the Faction War."

"We believe that the Revolutionists do have some of this technology and there were rumours of them wanting to abduct Cara and Matthew to further develop this technology under duress," Natalia explained.

"So where does Christina fit into all this?" I asked.

"She seems to be a source of information for them. We believe she is the one supplying information about who would be able to develop the technology and how to transport in and out of the city. We also believe she is a go-between, delivering information to different sources all over the city and using the cover of her current position in relocating residents to achieve it relatively unnoticed and without arousing undue suspicion."

"So what do they have to gain by making the people believe we are the ones with the technology?" Candice asked.

"We believe it is so that once they develop the technology, they can implement it causing a two pronged effect. One that they can cause the issues or changes that they like with the technology and two that they will have the general public rebelling against us, keeping us busy while they do or take whatever they like, and think that they are the heroes. It would give them unprecedented control over the people and technology," Ethan/Eric said, adding his view.

"And who came to that conclusion?" I asked, feeling the scenario a little far-fetched or perhaps that was wishful thinking.

"I did," Ethan said and I nodded knowingly. Once an evil mastermind, always an evil mastermind.

"So what are we doing about it?" Candice asked.

"We are trying to get someone on the inside. We feel that is the only way to understand their organisation for us to get a step ahead of them."

"And where are we at with that?" I asked.

"We have two operatives who are working their way up through the ranks and gaining trust and influence. But it is a slow process. We are still trying to work out who is behind the group," Andy said.

"Any ideas?" I asked.

"Nothing at the moment. We don't seem to know enough about the organisation to even guess who the mastermind behind it is," Liana said.

"And so why are we here?" Candice asked, taking my hand.

"We wanted to fill you in on what we know and show Tobias the extent of our organisation in its current form," Natalia said.

"So once we leave, how will we contact you?" I asked.

"I believe I can answer that," Cara said proudly. She pulled out what looked similar to the tablet that David gave Tris with her mother's journal, but it is a smaller. It fits easily into the palm of Cara's hands. Cara taps the screen and it lights up. There are multiple applications and files on the tablet. She plugs it in to another device and suddenly it projects up on the wall. "I thought it would be easier to give everyone a tutorial at once," she explained.

"So you will all be given one of these. I tweaked the design and technology from the Bureau. This will allow us to all have access to the same files – publications, photos etc. We can all updated the files and add files to it, but only I have access to delete files. You can use the device to call or message anyone on the network, or multiple people at once. I felt this would be the best way for us all to keep in contact," Cara explains, running through the multi-use tool.

She passes one to each of us and we have a bit of a place with it. It's quite intuitive so we all find it quite easy to use and practise a conference call from different rooms. It has all the current information and photos on it of known operatives of the Revolutionists and is fantastic. We all meet again in the room with the table.

"Tobias, I will give you extra ones to distribute to those you see fit," Cara says and I nod.

"So what are we doing from now?" Candice asked.

"Continue to gather information and await their next move," Andy said and we nodded.

"What do we know about Vladimir Bostok? And do we know what he has to do with Johanna?" I asked.

"Only that he is working for the upper echelon of the Revolutionists. Not sure what he has to do with Johanna but we will start looking into that," Natalia answered.

"I think they have some kind of hold over her. That may assist you in working out who is running the show," I said. "Some of her reforms have changed lately, as have her priorities. And she seems to be more anxious now," I explained.

"Great, shall we get you two back now?" Liana asked. Candice and I looked at each other, then she nodded.

"Yes please," I answered and Candice went and said goodbye to her parents. I said goodbye to Cara and Matthew and then they injected something in our neck, catching us as everything went black and we fell to the ground.


	20. Chapter 20

Chapter 20

** Message from the author – Hey everyone! So sorry it has taken me so long to update. I've been really busy and away for a while. I'll try update more again soon!**

ZEKE

I woke up and turned to look at Shauna. I watched her sleeping, staring at her beautiful face. She was so peaceful when she was asleep. She no longer worried about the lack of use of her legs – not that that was an issue between us but when she thought I wasn't looking, I saw the haunted look cross her face after everything we had been through. And I worried about her. I wrapped my arms tighter around her, and cuddled back up to her. She groaned softly, waking. "Morning," she said as she snuggled back into my neck.

"Morning," I replied and kissed her forehead. I was getting used to this. I wasn't sure I would like the settled life, but I was really enjoying seeing Shauna all the time and waking up with her. Though we were alternating between each of our places and we kept a couple of nights free and alone so we wouldn't "crowd" each other.

But being so wrapped up in my life with Shauna meant that I had been somewhat out of the loop with what was going on with the outside world. I wasn't as focused on everyone else for a change. And that was both a blessing and a hindrance. I used to constantly have my finger on the pulse but lately I almost wouldn't have a clue with what was happening. I had kept out of it all lately and taken some time off work. Was about time I balanced the two and got back into it.

"Have you seen Tobias lately?" she asked me. I had filled her in on some parts of what was going on, though hadn't told her everything. She didn't know that Mar and Uri were back. Until we knew for sure it was them, Tobias, Amar, George and I agreed that we would keep it in-house. And so far that had worked. Majority of the trainees they were working with, weren't former Dauntless so it was a fairly minimal group that knew the others previously. So the situation had been very neatly contained so far.

"No I haven't," I replied and thought about it. I knew that he and Candice were at odds with each other for a while. Though they had spent a night together. But come to think of it, I had heard somewhere that they were missing. At first I thought they must be holed up somewhere working out their differences. But now I wasn't so sure. I had been out to his apartment a few times and tried his phone multiple times over the days and nothing.

"That's odd," Shauna mused, "you two had been spending a lot of time together. It's not me is it?" she asked, drawing the conclusion that he was leaving us be. Or that I was avoiding him because of her.

"No, I don't think so. I haven't been able to contact him. I might head in and see what I can find out. It's probably time I went to work anyway," I said and she giggled against me.

"Yeah it probably is," she said, still laughing. "What did he say when he found out?" she asked me a little nervously and I chuckled at the memory. Everyone that I had told had just smiled knowingly.

"He said it was about time," I replied and she smiled her shy smile. "I really should go to work," I said and she nodded. I reluctantly got up and showered before putting on what I wore to work most days – functional and practical clothes – and said goodbye to Shauna before heading into the Compound and straight into George's office. Amar was also there. Made it easy to catch up with everything with the two of them together.

"Have you seen Four?" I asked George and Amar.

"Haven't you heard?" Amar responded and I shook my head. "He and Candice were taken two days ago."

"What do you mean taken?"

"Like Cara and Matthew taken," Amar answered.

"Where from? Do we know anything?"

"They were in Four's old instructor quarters."

"FourTris?" I asked.

"Unknown. Reports are that they were different. Previously have been small groups, minimal violence, mixed clothing. This was a group all in black and a lot larger. Seemed reasonably violent and they were all wearing masks," George answered and I became worried. If they were violent and managed to get Four, they must be good. Or quite a large group indeed, because Four could certainly handle himself. That was a worrying thought.

"So what now?" I asked.

"Now we wait," Amar replied. "We have no leads, no means of contacting FourTris and no ideas of how to proceed."

"Right," I replied contemplatively. Was there a way I could contact FourTris? I didn't think that Four had managed to contact them and other than the obscure notes, they hadn't contacted him. Obscure notes! That was it. Maybe there was something in the quarters to let us know that they had taken Four.

"What are you thinking?" Amar asked me and I shrugged nonchalantly. I needed time to search it without being interrupted. FourTris had been very careful about where and how they left notes for Tobias.

"I hope they are ok," I replied and Amar and George nodded. "How are the other Protectors going without Candice?" I asked.

"They have just been told that Tobias and Candice are scoping out a location for an extended training activity," George replied and I nodded at the sense it made. I needed to search Four's quarters. If I ran straight out of here, chasing down a lead, they would inevitably follow me and I just wanted time to have a look myself.

I needed to take my time and push the thought from my mind. "So what's going on in the Fringe?" I asked, "Any news on Vladimir?"

"No news on Vladimir, he seems to have gone underground. Christina also hasn't been seen lately. The atmosphere in the Fringe seems to be becoming more tense and we are anticipating some kind of incident to occur soon. We don't imagine it would be too drastic at this stage but it is completely unknown."

"Definitely sounds like something is coming. What have we got in terms of eyes and ears?" I asked. We needed intel and it sounded like we needed it now if it wasn't already too late.

"Not a lot. We had Jack and James following Christina but they disappeared when she did," George replied, referring to two officers that were ex-Dauntless and now officers of the law.

"Any news on their safety?" Too many people were disappearing lately and I really didn't like it. I regretted spending so much leisure time with Shauna when this was the result. I should have been here to see the situation unfold and to stop it.

"Nothing."

"Wonderful," I said and ran my fingers through my hair in angst. "I need some air," I said and left taking the convoluted back way to Four's old quarters. I entered the room cautiously. The furniture seemed tossed but thankfully there was no sign of blood. Other than descriptions of the assailants in that they were wearing all black and a much larger more brute force group, nothing from the picture they had left behind said Four was in imminent danger.

I eyed the room carefully as I thought about the other clues FourTris had left – under a floorboard in Cara's bedroom and in the library books on Matthew's bookshelf. Where would they hide something in Tobias' room? Something to do with Tris maybe? Or his weapons/training?

Four had taken majority of his personal belongings when he had left here. His bed had remained, as had the Dauntless furniture of a locker, chest of drawers and so on. But there weren't really any personal effects here. I walked over to his bed and lifted the mattress, checking underneath it. Nothing. Next I checked the chest of drawers. Each drawer was empty but I felt along the underside of each one and on the bottom drawer felt something.

I carefully pulled it off. There was a letter. Not that it was legible. I sighed.

"_4 6 say fat hour lock weight."_

I tried to think about what it could mean. 4 and 6 were obviously Four and Tris. He had explained that after we found the books. Say fat hour lock weight? What did that mean? I finally worked it out when I said the words aloud. Safe at our loc. Wait. Ok so FourTris had them and so they were fine. Presumably they had wrecked the room so no one knew who had them. I wondered when they would be back.

Should I tell Aram and George?

I decided to sit on the information for now.

But what to do now? I couldn't do anything about Four but perhaps I could move forward with the rest while I waited for him to come back. I thought about what our main objectives were at the moment.

We needed more information on Vladimir and Christina. And where had Jack and James disappeared to? That still didn't make sense. The last time they had reported in, they were close to Christina's apartment. I decided to head over there and see if there was anything subtle that had been missed as it had at each other location so far. Notes from FourTris or this proletariat group.

Actually we needed more on the Protectors as well. We needed to establish for once and for all who they were. If they were indeed our fallen comrades and family or if they were just uncanny lookalikes. But how could I determine that?

Dammit I hoped Four was back soon. I needed to pick someone's brain about things and he was the only one who knew anything. Either that or I would have to confide in someone else. But who? Dare I drag Shauna into the danger?


	21. Chapter 21

CANDICE

I'm warm.

Too warm.

Hot even.

I'm sweating. The heat is stifling. I look around and I am in a brightly lit room with black walls. There are heaters lined the walls and the vent is blowing hot air. It is utterly stifling. The air is so hot it hurts to breathe in and I find myself holding my breath, looking around the room while fighting the rising panic. My eyes feel like they are burning.

My lungs were burning both from the heat and from the lack of oxygen. I could feel myself getting lightheaded from lack of oxygen.

Come on, think! I urged myself. Calm down and think!

The situation and fighting the rising fear and panic reminds me of something. Reminds me of what? Think and then something releases from my memory. "It's not real," I said out loud calmly, expelling my breath in a rush. Suddenly the heaters are gone and the temperature, though still hot, is much more bearable. I gulped in deeps breaths of air and I started to feel better.

It reminds me of…

Something. But what?

I took a deep breath and thought back to the other experience I seemed to have. Something that wasn't real. If it wasn't real, it was a simulation. Meant to feel real. "Simulation," I said, mouthing the word. Something about that was ringing a bell.

Simulation. Causing fear.

THE FEAR LANDSCAPE!

Wait… the fear landscape. When had I experienced that… as Tris!?

Suddenly so many images slammed themselves into my skull and the pain was incredible. My skull felt as if it was about to burst and I groaned, clutched my skull and sat up gasping. The pain was so intense, it felt like a white hot searing pain had just annihilated the inside of my skull and I had trouble concentrating or pushing past the pain. It hurt so much. I barely felt a hand on my shoulder.

I had been asleep with Tobias wrapped around me like a vine. That's why I felt so hot.

"Candace, are you alright?" Tobias asked me, sitting up and looking around anxiously. I had been asleep. We were both at Tobias' in his room. As the images slow and settled and my poor sensibilities began to place all the images and memories I just regained, the pain lessened and became more bearable. I looked around. I recognised the décor and setting from when we had watched the movie.

I held up a finger to make him wait a second and struggled to sort through both my emotions and the sudden influx of memories. The pain had lessened to merely a headache now.

"Your nose," Tobias said alarmed and my hand went to my nose. There was a bit of blood. Nothing exciting. And after the earth shattering revelations I had just received, I was surprised that was the worst of it. Seriously, I was sure my skull was about to explode, as intermittent as the pain might have been.

"Tobias," I said and he looked at me, concern etched in his handsome face. "I am Tris!" I said with conviction and laughed hysterically. All the anxiety I had felt as Candace about Tobias loving me because I was like Tris, when I really was her! I was practically cackling and very quickly my laughter turned to tears.

"Are you ok?" he asked, one head cocked to the side as he hesitated before pulling me into his arms.

"Oh Tobias," I said, "I remember everything. I am Tris. I am Beatrice Prior. Born to Andrew and Natalie Prior of Abnegation. I chose Dauntless and you and I uncovered the truth about Erudite before the Faction War," I gushed, my entire head feeling like it was going to split open with the sudden flood gate like opening of memories.

"I knew it," he said with conviction and that was the last thing he said before his lips were planted firmly on mine and I could no longer think even half coherently as he kissed me with such emotion, such need. I felt all of his grief and I felt mine at having being separated from him for too long. And for what he went through thinking I was dead.

Finally, we had both calmed down enough and we started discussing what was actually going on.

"Ok so the Protectors. Tell me about how that came about," Tobias said and I thought about it.

'_From the corner of my eye, I see David slumped over in his chair. And my mother walking out from behind him. She is dressed in the same clothes she wore the last time I saw her, Abnegation gray.' _ I thought she couldn't be alive. But I felt her cool touch. I asked her if I was done. She had taken me somewhere. I closed my eyes.

When I opened them next, I had been in a room that was sterile white. I was connected to an IV though in minimal pain. And I had amnesia. But I realised now, that the amnesia was brought on by something. Some kind of drug, not trauma. And so I had been prepared to come back here. Everything that I thought happened by chance, being at Fort Bragg, being "recruited" into joining the others, it was all done by design.

I explained this to Tobias as my mind wrapped around the concept.

"How though?" he asked. "We had your body. Your dead body. I had you cremated!" he said, almost angrily and his voice broke as he stood up.

"I'm sorry. I'm not sure how," I said, standing as well. I went to him and wrapped my arms around him. "There must be something about it that has forced events to come to pass," I said, trying to work out why half of us had been taken.

"I left Dauntless, started fighting with words instead of fists," he said, trying to think logically, though he was still shaking with emotion.

"What have you pushed through? What have you had a hand in politically?" I asked him.

"Communications and equality," he answered.

"So basically, everything the Revolutionists are trying to unravel," I said though more as a statement than a question. He nodded. "And if you hadn't been here to push that agenda?" I asked.

Realisation hit him like a ton of bricks.

"Then they would have walked in with no opposition. There would be less warning and the limited cooperation between all sectors would be non-existent. They would have everything they wanted and no one would be any the wiser," he said and I nodded in understanding.

"So now we just have to work out how to get the others to remember without anyone being any wiser so we can work out what to do from here," I said and he nodded contemplatively.

"What made you remember?" he asked. I laughed.

"Fear landscape," I said simply.

"Actually that makes sense. That's how Zeke and I knew a little of what was coming. We could meet you there," he answered. And that memory hit me. I was able to communicate with him there previously. But it would be dangerous to put anyone into the actual landscape. We weren't the only ones that could use it. "Think it would work for the others?" he asked.

"I'm not sure. But it's a dangerous game we play now," I answered and he nodded understanding. I had given him the idea that the landscape was no longer safe when I was in there last with him. "What is our first step?" I asked him.

"Zeke," we both answered. We both got up and got dressed and went over to his place. Tobias knocked on his door and there was no answer. We waited. Then knocked again.

Nothing.

Tobias went and knocked on the neighbour's door before I could react and I tried to stop him but it was too late. Then Shauna answered the door. She was looking straight at Tobias and hadn't noticed me yet. What was Tobias thinking? By doing this with me here, it was dragging Shauna into the danger and turmoil that she wasn't ready for yet. But I had missed her friendship. I quickly ducked into the doorway of Zeke's door, pressing flat against it.

"Hey Tobias, Zeke was looking for you. Wait is someone with you?" Shauna asked. I wondered if I had created a shadow from moving. Dammit.

"Uh," Tobias answered, appearing somewhat startled. Apparently realisation had just hit. I rolled my eyes. "No, just me," Tobias replied, recovering well and I felt Shauna stick her head out and glance down the corridor. "Can I come in?" he asked and there was a pause.

"Yeah sure," she said and a second later I heard the door close. I paused a moment, then ran silently passed her door and pressed myself into the next doorway, again pressing flat against the door. My instincts proved true as a half second later, her door opened again.

"Honestly, I'm on my own," I heard Tobias say as I held my breath. Then the door closed again. I quickly completed my trek down the hallway and downstairs, waiting for Tobias in a secluded area across the road from Zeke's building where I had a good vantage point, able to watch as I waited.

About half an hour later, Tobias emerged on his own and began walking up the street away from me. I watched the front of Zeke's building for another minute before I followed. Sure enough, Shauna followed a minute later. So I hung back and followed both of them.

Tobias moved at a leisurely pace, presumably trying to prove he wasn't hiding anything. I was hoping he knew I would be following. And I had a feeling he knew that Shauna was following him. She certainly moved well now on her prosthetic leg. Was so good to see. But then I wondered if the tech they had a Fort Bragg could help her? Most of us had made it through fatal injuries in their care and I had done some medical training there and knew they were ahead of anything I had seen anywhere else. Given I had no memories of anywhere else, this knowledge was instinctual. Now that I knew though, I questioned everything and saw most things with a new light.

And to be honest, I wondered if ignorance was bliss. As Candice, I was doing ok with Tobias and my life here. Was I better for knowing everything that had happened or that I had caused? Then I thought again about Tobias and knew I wouldn't trade the memories I had returned of us for anything. Neither had he. He hadn't given up on us and wiped his memory. Thankfully. I wondered if he contemplated it after my death. I knew, had our roles been reversed, I definitely would have.

Probably the only person that could have talked me out of it, would have been Christina. I wondered what she was doing now. Tobias hadn't mentioned her. And the info we received as the Protectors was completely task oriented… well so far training oriented.

Tobias entered a building, and cautiously, I watched Shauna enter a second later. I moved up closer to the building but on the other side of the road where I had a clear view through the glass door. He confronted her. I could see them both gesticulating wildly. Tobias was shaking his head and Shauna was pointing at him. After a minute, they both seemed to calm down. Shauna hugged him and left. I watched her head back the way we had come.

I was so busy watching her to make sure she had really stopped this time, that I didn't see Tobias leave. I looked through the door, and couldn't see him at all. I looked anxiously up the street and couldn't see him anywhere.

Shit. What was I going to do now? I tried to think of where he would head now but I wasn't sure what Shauna had told him, nor what they had just agreed on. Or where Zeke was. I would have the head back to Dauntless HQ and see if we could regroup there?

Yes. That's what I would do.

Suddenly there was a beeping from the thing that Cara had given us. Oh der, the tablet. I looked at it, flipping open the cover as I went. Tobias had sent me a message. I pressed Open.

"Look behind you," the message said and I spun around startled.

Standing there calmly, ignoring my rising panic, was Tobias.

And Zeke.

"Zeke," I said and launched myself at him, hugging him tightly.

"Hey Candace," he said, sounding surprised at my sudden delight and familiarity. I pulled back an raised an eyebrow at him. "Wait, Stiff?" he asked and I nodded. Then it was my turn to be launched upon. "So you are really them?!" he said, his voice breaking.

"Ease up Zeke," Tobias said and Zeke let go of me.

"Yes Zeke, but I regained my memories by accident. They haven't yet. We need to regroup and look at the big picture and how we can safely bring their memories back. And we need to talk about FourTris. We need somewhere we can go and talk safely," I said and they both nodded though I could see that was the last thing that Zeke wanted to do. "Hancock building?" I suggested and I saw Tobias pale slightly but they both nodded.

If only we had time to zipline. I sighed with longing as we ran and jumped the train on our way to the Hancock building.

"Start talking," Zeke said once we were on the train.

"Wait, tell me about Christina," I said and Tobias and Zeke both looked at each other, sharing unspoken words presumably about whether or not to tell me. "Tell me," I urged.

Tobias sighed. "We think she is in league with the Revolutionists," he answered. "All evidence points to her being the link between their operatives getting their information."

Damn. That couldn't be right. Surely?


	22. Chapter 22

Chapter 22

****Message from the author – thanks everyone for sticking with me! I know it's been way too long since I updated. Hit a little writers block! Please R&amp;R. Love seeing the reviews and thoughts!"****

TOBIAS

It was so good to have her back, and whole. And to know I had been right about my instincts. But that incredible transformation she had been through had fried her brain temporarily. Was it a good thing to have the others go through that? I could tell she was in the most intense pain and the pressure in her skull had been so extreme that her nose had even bled.

We jumped from the train and ran up to the Hancock building, trudging it up to the roof. After all this time, it still amazed me that the building remained empty. After we went and sat in a corner of the roof where we wouldn't be seen or heard, we continued talking.

I thought back to how this all started with the fear landscape and seeing her in there. She had talking about that damn nonsensical line "A time-symmetric event causes a warranted change and so we be chosen." And her frequent mentioning of "The Man". But she didn't seem to remember much of her time in the landscape. I wondered how she had even been in there at all.

"So Christina is working for them?" Tris asked for the hundredth time and Zeke and I just nodded. I could understand why it was a difficult concept for her to grasp. The best friend she had left, would never have crossed to the dark side. And Eric?! Who would have thought he would be on the good side this time?

"So Stiff, tell me. How do we get the others to remember?" Zeke asked her, obviously thinking foremost about his brother. "And how is it even possible?"

"I don't know how it is possible. We will need to try and figure it out. But as for the remembering, the fear landscape made me remember. I dreamt I was in it and it triggered concepts of the memories that made me remember. But that was our thing," Tris added looking at me. "We had our connection of the fear landscape. Who is to say that the others would remember from the same thing?" she mused and that put another spanner in the works.

She was totally right. Just because the landscape had caused her memory to return didn't mean it would work for the others. It was definitely an option though otherwise we would need to work out what would trigger it for the others. And that would be a lengthy process.

Zeke swore.

"So what do we do?" I asked her and her face puckered in thought. "After what you went through, the pain I saw on your face, is it worth it?"

"Try the landscape?" she said a while later. "It is the best lead we have at the moment. We can go in in pairs with someone to pull us if we need to," she suggested and I nodded, looking at Zeke. "Yes, the pain was fierce and intense. But I am so much happier remembering who you are Four," she said and squeezed my hand tightly in her small one.

"Okay, where?" I asked. Zeke took a deep breath.

"Here," he said and produced the vials and injector.

"What the hell?" she asked and shuddered. At the thought of the landscape? At him carrying them around ready to inject himself or someone else? I wasn't sure and didn't ask.

"It was the only way to see any of you," I explained and saw Zeke's eyes tear up.

"Okay, Zeke and I will go in with Uri and Mar and try and pull them back? Or maybe just Uri to begin with?" Tris said.

"If I need to pull you out in a hurry, better just doing one at a time?" I suggested. I was a bit nervous about having to pull too many out in seconds. Plus I was scared as hell about losing her again if she went in. "And what if you don't come out?" I asked her, my voice breaking as I gripped her hands hard.

"I will, I promise," she said and for some reason, I believed her. I took a deep, calming breath. We had a plan, now we had to action it and the sooner the better.

"I will go and get the others and bring them here. All four of them?" I asked and we all looked at each other. Zeke shrugged and we both looked at Tris.

"Yeah get Bill, Tyrah, Zachuriah and Marly," Tris said. "It will be better if we have the whole gang to fight whatever is coming. We are stronger together than we are alone," she said and smiled at me. I nodded and made a move to get up.

"No, I'll go," Zeke said. "You guys enjoy your time before we go in. I will leave half the serum here and take half with me. Just in case," he said and we nodded. We were in such a precarious position until the others remembered and until we worked out who "The man" was and how to stop the Revolutionists.

As Zeke left, Tris came and sat in my lap as I leaned back against the low wall of the roof, and I wrapped myself around her, cocooning her in my arms. "I've missed you so much," she said.

I couldn't even speak. Words just couldn't do justice to how it felt to have her back. While a part of me always had hope I would see her again, and then seeing her and hoping it was her and falling in love with her anyway, even if it would never be her.

"I love you," I said simply and then she kissed me and I was lost.

A while later, we sat contented being with each other and looking forward to spending time alone together where I could make her mine and get to know her body intimately.

"You really loved Candace as well, didn't you?" she asked me and I looked at her. It was true. I had fallen for Candace and not just because she looked like Tris.

"I will always love you in any form," I said and she smiled at me, content with my answer.

"I love you Tobias," she said and she snuggled back against me while we waited for the others to arrive. "I always knew that you'd come back to get me and you always knew that it wouldn't be easy. To go back to the start to see where it all began or end up at the bottom to watch how it all ends. You tried to lie and say I was everything, I remember when I said I'm nothing without you. Somehow I found a way to get lost in you, let me inside, let me get close to you. Change your mind, I'll get lost if you want me to. Somehow I found a way to get lost in you," she said.

"You always thought I left myself open but you didn't know I was already broken. I told myself that it wouldn't be so bad, you pulled it away you took everything I had. The pain of it all, the rise and the fall, I see it all in you. Now every day I find myself say I want to get lost in you. I'm nothing without you," I replied to her.

[Lyrics from Lost In You by Three Days Grace]

Just then we heard someone coming, and both stealthily moved to a better vantage point to see who it was. It wasn't Zeke. Or the other Protectors.

It was… wait… Christina? I looked at Tris and saw shock on her face as we silently watched her.

"There's no one here," Christina said into her headset as she looked around. She looked right at where we were hiding and I daren't move. I don't think either of us breathed. If we could see her, could she see us? Did she know we were actually there? "Yes, I am sure." Pause. "No. I have more information for Harry. Can you organise a meeting in the usual spot?" we heard her ask then pause. "Good. See you soon," she said, and wait… did she wink? Tris and I looked at each other then watched her leave.

"Should we follow her?" Tris asked me.

"I don't know," I replied and we both mentally weighed up the pros and cons. While we would be stronger with more intel, we would be stronger still with the whole team back.

"I think we should stay and wait," she said and I nodded having just come to the same conclusion. "So who is Harry?" she asked me. I had been wondering the same thing. It wasn't a name I knew. I racked my brain trying to think of every Harry I had met. Nothing was coming to mind. "Did she wink at us as she left?" Tris asked me and I gasped. Had she seen it too? What did it mean? Had Christina known we were there and covered for us? There were so many questions bouncing around in my head.

"I don't know," I said.

We waited in our new vantage point silently for the others to arrive, making ourselves comfortable as we seemed to be in for a long wait. It was seeming to take forever for them to come back. I kissed Tris again. I wished I could get to know her intimately now. I had missed her terribly. And we had never gone that far before she… died.

"I wish we didn't have to be wise," she whispered and kissed me hard, sighing against me as my fist bunched her shirt and began lifting it up. She didn't stop me and my lips moved their way down to her neck.

I removed her shirt and she pulled mine up over my head. I was so distracted by her that when I next opened my eyes and looked up, I frowned. I hadn't realised how much time had passed and now I was starting to get concerned. The sun was setting and dusk setting in, turning steadily to night as the sky darkened. I lost myself in kissing her again, the feeling of her in my arms and my lips on hers, much stronger than my thinking ability.

It was very quickly getting dark and I waited for my eyes to adjust to the dim light. The moon was nearly full so there was quite a lot of light shining down that I could still see Tris quite clearly.

"Should we call it a night?" I asked Tris and we looked at each other, both contemplating our options again. And being able to not be wise, in the comfort of my room. Then she sighed and shook her head.

"No, I think we should give it a bit longer. Under the cover of darkness is clever considering someone already knows we have been here," she said and I nodded. Coming from an intel background with Dauntless, that should have occurred to me but the place had changed so much that I hadn't really needed to think tactically lately and the muscle memory had faded.

"You're right," I said softly to her then we heard something again. We both silently put our shirts back on as we watched, waiting for the next person to come into view.


End file.
